#if you actually read the second part i love you

[jade-jini]

https://www.tumblr.com/jade-jini/736010537938403328/im-sorry-for-not-posting-in-like-forever-but-im?source=share

PLEASE WRITE THE SECOND PART I BEG YOU

(This pic omg I wanna gnaw on her shoulders, Also I want to apologize for how long this sht is. )

Warning: Smut, multiple times. G!P reader.

14k fuckin words 😭

Somebody commented it on the first part but sigh how do I write this. Aeri and lactation kink, yes there I said it (also I’m sorry if I sound ignorant, idk much about this-). My bad, I got carried away with the lore.

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Let’s picture this; rich girl! Aeri, as in Diva Giselle. Bad bitch who always gets what she wants, and what does she want? You.

As daddy’s girl, she’s spoiled af, but not stupid nor ignorant to stuff. In fact, she’s her dad’s best counselor when it comes to certain decisions about the company, but she prefers to keep it as an unofficial position, Aeri loves her free time too much. That was, until she saw the new employee (at least she thought you were new ‘cause she had never noticed you before in these floors and offices that were rather for the more important executives).

Ah, so you were the one she’s heard about. That one employee who started at a rather lower position and was able to expand and work with this big idea (idea that Aeri actually proposed:D) to such level that you were offered a nice promotion.

“Hm, one with brains, that’s a first…” Aeri thought as she was eyeing you for the first time, up and down “I like that.”

You were nervous. Only recently you went from some executive’s rookie assistant to being offered a position ABOVE him (😭), and currently also a project manager.

Now, you were having this type of unofficial meeting with 2 directors, a senior manager, and the CEO of the company, Mr. Uchinaga, who had brought his daughter (who was none other than the person who proposed and planned the project that gave you the chance to prove your potential). Thankfully, the three other people you were working with (and who you knew were close with the boss) were kind and supportive, knowing you had potential but not so much experience with such a heavy position. You weren’t expecting the team around you to be so kind and cooperative, not with what you’ve heard of powerful and rich people. But you were thankful that you got lucky enough to have that good environment around you.

The short meeting at the CEO’s office went nice and smooth, just clarifying some points and expectations. You knew the boss was carefully listening to your words, with a strict look, but pleased with the answers you were giving so far. You learned he was a serious and straightforward person, but always respectful and clearly with the best intentions for his company and employees. That helped your nervous state, but the way his daughter was quiet the whole time as she just stared at you with a look you couldn’t read… didn’t help much. It was intimidating, to say the least. She wouldn’t stop eyeing you up and down, making you feel so exposed that you had to adjust yourself on your seat and clear your throat (and gulp lmao) multiple times throughout the conversation. You thanked God you brought a file for the project, which she and her dad quietly read, giving you a break from her intense stare. However, her face was so unexpressive you didn’t know if she liked or hated what you worked on. Or maybe simply didn't care. She seemed to approve though, because she gave a nod to her dad, and one of the directors slightly grabbed your leg and winked at you with a smile, so you assumed this was a very good sign.

You covered a sigh of relief once the others got up and started saying their goodbyes to both the boss and his daughter, who respectfully but uninterestedly did the same. You tried to pay attention to what your superiors were saying as you four walked down the hallway, the senior manager asking you to stop at her office so she could give you some documents to work on, and you nodded to it, but your mind was stuck on Aeri. In the way her leather skirt slightly moved when she crossed her legs. You shook your head, scolding yourself mentally. You didn’t want to allow your mind to go there about a girl you just met. Specially not a girl in her position. “Too dangerous” you told yourself.

————————————————————————

“Yeah. She seems like a brilliant young lady, a lot of potential right there.” Mr. Uchinaga commented to his daughter when she asked about you, excusing it with wanting to know a bit since she’s never seen you before.“she’s still on probation, though. She did good with your project idea, now it’s her time to show if she’s stable and responsible enough for this position. Not just some lucky strike, you know what I mean?”

“You seemed satisfied with every answer she gave you earlier though” she reminded her dad with a smile “almost like she could read your mind. And you were doing your best to play it off. So mean, daddy” she giggled. Mr. Uchinaga rolled his eyes at his daughter.

“Well if I react too much, people are going to think the bare minimum is enough to satisfy me. She did very good, but I need to make sure they all know it’s not an easy job and they gotta do beyond their best. That’s how you incentivize them.” He said as he poured himself a cup of coffee and gave it a good sip, letting out a satisfied and happy sound “Except this coffee. This coffee always does a perfect job. No notes!"

Aeri rolled her eyes as she smiled and shook her head, looking at one of the documents you left in the office for them to review.

“Plus, I don’t know what you’re scolding me about. You didn’t even talk to the kid. Honestly if you weren’t checking those documents like you KINDA cared, I would’ve thought you were about to abandon this building in the middle of the meeting, dear.”

“I just didn’t have much to say. You know I don’t like meetings or any of this office stuff, daddy” Aeri said nonchalantly.

“Oh I know” the old man sighed “I still appreciate you decided to join this one. Come here!” He said as he caught her daughter by surprised with a bear hug lol. Aeri complained, but couldn’t suppress a giggle.

“Dad, you’re causing almost as many wrinkles on my clothes as the ones you have on your face. Put me down!”

————————————————————————

For someone who has been spending so much time thinking about Aeri, you sure as hell looked surprised when the literal creator of the project you’re the manager of appeared in front of your office with questions about it.

“Hello? did you hear me?” She called, waving her hand in front of your face “can I come in or not?”

You shook your head and cleared your throat, getting out of your trance and moving out of the way for her to enter “of course! What can I do for you?” You stuttered as you nervously rubbed your hands together. “Would you like some coffee? Let me get you some coffee-”

“Ms. Y/l/n I can get that for you” your secretary kindly suggested. You were still so not used to having one, but Eunjoo was so patient and kind, and around your same age, so it made it easier.

“Oh no no don’t worry, I don’t wanna bother you” you said with a nervous giggle.

“It’s my job, ma’am, No bother” she insisted already getting up, but Aeri stopped her.

“Don’t worry, Eunjoo. I already had coffee earlier, just make sure nobody bother us will ya? Thank you. ” Aeri said with a smile you weren’t sure was genuine or not. Your secretary simply answer with a ‘yes Ms. Uchinaga’ and sat back down to continue her job. Aeri closed the door and walked inside your office as if it was hers. But that’s how she walked and acted everywhere, like it was hers. That’s that confident attitude she had. That intimidating behavior and charisma flying through the air whenever she was present.

She wondered how exactly to start the conversation. I mean, she didn't wanna be to aggressive about it, but honestly she also wasn't one to care much how people took her words. She was gonna tell you what was on her mind, and you could do whatever you pleased with that. When she received a few new pages of the edited project just the day before, she noticed the changes you had made, and decided to talk to you about it personally. I mean, it was the project she started, and she never saw mistakes on her plans, so why did you make so many changes? and why did she care much anyways? maybe an excuse to see you again. No wonder she had been around the office more often the last week. It made her dad happy though.

The young woman stared at you, like she was waiting for something. Confused, you looked away and back to her “yes?”

“You’re not gonna sit down?” She asked with an obvious tone. Nervously, you quickly sat on a small chair close to the door. Aeri sighed and you looked at her getting worried.

“What?” You asked, not understanding why she was staring at you like you were doing something wrong.

“Don’t you prefer to sit somewhere else? I don’t know, on your own chair and desk maybe? since this is your office?” She asked sarcastically while pointing at the objects, finding it ridiculously funny how clearly new and unfamiliar you were with your new position in the business hierarchy.

“Ah! of course! Heh..” you nervously laughed as you hurried to your corresponding seat. “My chair, with my desk” you patted the table in front of you “in my office.” You smiled so innocently that it made Aeri’s eyes shine with how cute you were. But she didn’t wanna show that side. The Japanese girl simply sat in front of you, putting the same project binder you gave her and her dad some days ago. Aeri had actually been studying it in more detail (well-), and caught a few details that you seemed to have changed from her original idea. You looked at it as it rested on your desk, frowning your eyebrows a bit as you now looked at Aeri, waiting for her to start.

“I’ve noticed you took certain.. creative freedom with my project, right?” She started, opening the documents and going through it. “For example, here. It seems you have an interest in adding trade shows. This company is already well known, y/n, we don’t really need this” she remarked, as if the subjection of investing time and any effort on it was absurd. However, this is something you had discussed with the other members that were working on the project, and they seemed to agree very well with your subjection, that’s why you were so sure to add it to the project.

“Well, yes of course the company is one of the most popular in the country and even internationally wise but, since we’re taking such a different path here, presenting something so new for this business, that’s why with the other managers we discussed it and thought it would be good to invest in new relations and marketing strategies” you explained to her, with a kind and shy smile as you spoke. You could already tell she seemed to take it a bit personal when other people change whatever she initiated.

Aeri simply “hmm” at you as a response, as she continued passing the pages. “Ah! here as well. What do you mean the design and location of one of the first stores ‘didn’t make any sense’?” Yeah. That one she took personal.

“Ah..” you nervously giggled as you looked down, a bit embarrassed at the way you wrote that note down. “Yes, about that.” The girl looked at you, as if waiting for a completely different response “we did a geographic study of the business, and locating a store in that part of the city just wouldn't really work. You see even though it's a centric zone, it's already saturated with a completely different market, the only available space is really small, and it wouldn't even sell well. It wouldn't be profitable there, Ms. Uchinaga. At least not this product." you explained to the young woman, hoping kinder words would get a better reaction out of her this time. "Anything else you would like to ask about?"

"Anything else?" she scoffed, a bit sarcastic, making your smile fade away. Aeri picked up a couple pages from the folder, holding them a bit too rough in your opinion " you added pages and pages of changes to the project." she exclaimed, letting the pages fall on the desk abruptly.

"J-just a few corrections nothing too-" you tried to clarify, a bit nervous with her attitude, picking up your notes and organizing them.

"Corrections? did I make that many mistakes?"

“Of course not, ma’am, but-” she interrupted you again.

"you might as well just make a new project from scratch if you think I'm that uncapable, you know? I mean- " She challenged and stood up as you looked up at her, gulping. Her high heels made her look way taller than you remembered. What was this girl's problem??

“With all due respect, Ms. Uchinaga” You interrupted her this time raising your hand, making Aeri stare at you surprised. "I understand that seeing so many changes in something one started might feel a bit insulting, but I assure you ma'am that any decision made is with the best intention for the project and the company, and of course, after discussing it with the rest of the team." You weren't sure how you didn't stutter saying all that. You felt like your tone was a little too defiant, even when you weren't trying to be so. But you didn't want to just stay quiet and agree with everything without considering what really was best. "Your project is good, really good, and it's great to work on it and see it getting developed, but no matter who created it, what I care about is seeing it out there with its full potential, no matter how many corrections we have to do to it, which really wasn't many. I know how those documents might look, but most of it are notes, not corrections. Here, please. Take another look." You handed her the notes, making sure she notices that there's stuff written in the back of the pages as well (lol).

Aeri felt whatever she was going to say stuck in her throat. She wasn't familiar with the feeling of people leaving her speechless, and she didn't know how much she liked that. Not used to other employees standing up for themselves like you did, even if it wasn't too big of a deal or argument.. it really made her more curious about you. Aeri took the papers from your hands, this time being more gentle, and put them together with the rest inside the folder.

"I'll review this a bit more, and see you in the next meeting." the Japanese girl simply stated, as she started her way out. You licked your lips, and nodded as you processed what happened. You felt like you guys were there for hours, even though you were sure it was just a few minutes.

"Yes, ma'am."

“And it’s Aeri.” she firmly said, looking at you over her shoulder.

"Excuse me?" you asked, not processing something so obvious as her telling you her name, dumbass.

"My name, smartass" she said as if it wasn't obvious (told you) "we must be around the same age, so just call me Aeri" and just like that, she left foreal this time, closing your door behind her.

"Aeri..." you whispered once you were alone in your office. You groaned, clearly disliking how you were feeling "she even has a nice name too?! goddamn it!"

————————————————————————

Aeri lied to you.

She didn't wait until the next official meeting to see you again. Almost everyday of the following weeks you could find her in your office, working and reviewing the details for the project together. Heck, you guys would even have lunch together in your office. At some point, Aeri's dad could swear he could hear laughs from inside your office. His daughter's laugh. That careless laugh that would make him smile the second it resonated. It's been a minute since he's heard Aeri laugh like that with somebody, let alone in the company. Nonetheless, he was happy to know his daughter seemed to have found a good friend in this environment. He looked at your assistant, who was probably just slightly younger than you, and asked her.

"Tell me, Eunjoo, are those two always laughing like that?"

Eunjoo looked up a bit shy that the big boss was talking to her, but after listening to the question she relaxed a bit and gave him a smile as well as she nodded happily "yes, sir. At least the last few days since they have been spending more time together. I can tell they work well together." Mr. Uchinaga listened attentively, happy to hear that her daughter found somebody who motivated her to work and care for something.

"You know, sir" she added, catching the older man's attention again "with all due respect, I wasn't used to see Ms. Aeri in the office so often, but since she started coming again, Ms. y/n seems to have been feeling more comfortable. More confident too" the young girl said, her cute smile appearing once more. Eunjoo had grown fond of you, and she was genuinely happy to see you grow confident, she herself knowing how nerve-wracking can be.

"I'm glad to hear that. I'm sure this is good for both of them" he commented, receiving a nod from the young girl "please, let them know the meeting will be soon, ok?"

"Of course, sir." and the man started walking back to his own office.

————————————————————————

"Oh my God, calm down already, y/n!" Aeri dramatically sighed as she grabbed the girl in front of her by the shoulders. She was trying her best not to laugh, but the girl just looked too funny panicking since Aeri told her that an important investor was gonna be in the meeting they were having today. "It's gonna be fineee!"

"You dont know that!" you said, your voice denoting your anxiety "w-what if I mess up, or if I say something wrong or if he isn't convinced or-" she interrupted you, her cold hands holding your face now.

"Read my lips, since your ears are clearly not working" she said, rolling her eyes "It. will. be. fine. We've been reviewing the details for days now, and everybody already gave their thumbs up about it. It the senior executives are chill, why not you?" She asked, her words slowly helping you "Besides, the meeting is in a few hours, you have time to review a few more times and-"

"Excuse me, ladies" you heard Eunjoo's voice through the phone "Mr. Uchinaga asked me to inform you that the meeting will start soon~"

"Oh shit, I guess I was wrong" she giggled, and you groaned as you started walking around your office again, clearly not feeling ready. Aeri lost count of how many times she had rolled her eyes at you today. 'God how I wish I could shut her up somehow, she's driving me crazy. Why can't she just relax?!' she thought, and that's when an idea hit her.

Aeri and you had grown closer (even flirting jokingly sometimes), talking about each other's lives often. One afternoon, for example, you guys were talking about your sexual life, and you talked to her about what's in your pants. Her reaction was very positive, more curious than anything. You confessed to her that even though you weren't a virgin, you haven't had that many experiences. In exchange, Aeri told you about how she started to be sexually active back during her last year of high school. Since she came from an important family, and was going to a prestigious school, she constantly had that stress on her shoulders to have perfect grades. As a senior, that stress just got worse, but she decided she couldn't live feeling like this. So during a sleepover with a friend at the time, she opened up about how she felt. Her friend offered help, and as several teenagers finding their new reckless, hormonal selves, she accepted.

Aeri quickly learned how good it felt to relieve stress in that way. A way that till this day she still uses often, having casual hookups from time to time. She even joked once that if you ever got too stressed, she'll help you too, but you guys just laughed it off. Maybe this time she didn't need to treat it as a joke, not when, to be honest, she never even wanted to treat it as such.

Aeri couldn't deny to herself her attraction for you, and she wasn't sure if you noticed, or if you were too oblivious, but the tension between you guys... sometimes it felt crazy. But she wondered if that was all in her head. After all, she also learned from you that you hadn't been that sexually active in your life. However, today Aeri was more than willing to take a risk and confirm if you wanted her too.

"Sit down, y/n." she ordered, and you stopped walking to look at her.

"Sitting?!" you exclaimed, throwing your hands in the air "we gotta get going, Aeri! I-I need to make sure the documents are in order and we need to rush and-"

"Sit. down. Now, y/n." she repeated, and by her tone and look, you could tell there was no choice, but to follow. So you went to the couch on your office, and sat down, waiting for her to just do or say whatever it was she was going to. You guys were going to be late and you knew you'd be the one to blame because who in the world would blame the daughter of THE boss of the company?!

You looked at the girl in front of you as she slowly started walking towards you. Confused, you lowkey side-eyed her, wondering what was she planning.

"I think we need to.. relax a bit, before going to that meeting, don't you think?" she suggested, her voice feeling softer than usual, almost like velvet, almost.. coquettish?

"I told you, Aeri. I can't. I'll just push through it, it's ok. C'mon I don't wanna be late." You sighed, just accepting your faith and getting up. But you fell back to the couch, Aeri had pulled you by the shoulders, sitting on your lap to make sure you didn't try to get up again. You gasped quietly, shocked by the girl's actions "w-what are you-"

"It's not gonna be good for neither of us to go to that meeting all stressed and believe it or not, your anxious ass is contagious, so now I'M stressed too." She scolded, her voice for some reason making you shrink into the couch. "I think it's only logical and fair that we.. help each other before we go, yes?"

"Aeri, I dont know if-" you stuttered.

"Let me help you relax, yes?" she sexily whispered next to your ear, and you could feel your member already getting excited inside your pants. Aeri gave you a mischievous smile "I think one of you guys already have an answer, huh?"

"We-we're gonna be late..." you gulped, not wanting to miss such important meeting, but incapable of rejecting the girl. I mean c'mon, she had been in your mind since the day you first saw her.

"Then let's hurry. The faster you get to relax, the faster we'll go to your precious meeting"

"But I dont have any condoms with me I-" You tried to explain.

"It's ok, I take pills. C'mon I know you want this just as much as I do"

Aeri started undoing your shirt a bit, just enough to have access to your neck, which she started kissing as she grinded on your lap. The friction feeling so good with her lips on you, that you gave up to her. You started undoing your belt and pants, and you could feel her smile against your skin. You softly scoffed with a smile 'help me relax, sure' you thought to yourself.

Once your already hard member was out and free, you moved her miniskirt a bit, and then her panties to the side, so you could rub it against Aeri's clit, wanting to make sure the girl was wet enough so you wouldn't hurt her. But the moment you made contact with her, you could tell she was more than ready.

"You're so wet already, for how long have you been this horny?" you teased her, the sensation so good, her fluids covering your cock as you kept rubbing it in between her lips. Aeri whined, so impatient to feel you but annoyed at your teasing.

"S-shut up and put it in already..."

You laughed, and did as she said, slowly getting inside her pussy and enjoying how she wrapped around you, how warm she felt. You both moaned as you got deeper and deeper.

"It's actually bigger than I imagined..." Aeri said, struggling a bit to talk as she adapted to your size.

"So you've been fantasizing about it, huh?" you smirked, as if you hadn't done the same. Aeri complained, and punched your shoulder, making you laugh at her reaction. You decided to tease her more, just in a different way. You got close to her ear, and whispered "It's ok, I have thought about you too, you know? And you feel even better than I could've ever imagined. So tight around me, and taking me so, so well~"

Aeri gasp loudly, almost forgetting that there probably were people outside your office. But all that was in the back of her mind, you felt too good for her to worry about that.

Once you were completely inside her, you let her take control, moving once she felt ready. That didn't take long, Aeri knew you guys had no time to waste. That is, of course, if you were still planning on going to that meeting, and Aeri knew you weren't gonna miss it for anything.

So she started riding you, going up and down on your dick at a pace not too fast, but not too slow. Your hands went to her waist, keeping her steady. God, she looked so hot like this, on top of you, focused on making you reach those spots inside her that she liked so much. You were hypnotized by her, lost in the pleasure you yourself were feeling as she sped up each time. You held her by the waist, and kissed her deeply, catching her off guard. Normally, Aeri's sexual partners in their majority have been those who think kissing is rather intimate, not for something like a 'quickie', which sometimes disappointed her. So she grabbed your face, and reciprocated the sweet, hungry contact. She could feel you moaning in her mouth, and smiled as she separated a bit, biting your lip in the process. She rested her forehead against yours, and bit her own lip. You looked so into it, into her. She always loved to feel wanted, needed, desired.

"Does it feel good?" she whispered caressing your face, knowing the answer just by looking at you, but wanting to hear you say it.

"uh-huh.." you mumbled as if your brain was off, making her giggle.

"Are you feeling more relaxed?"

"Yes, r-relaxed, sure..." You said in between teeth as you held her waist tighter, making her jump faster and harder on your cock, reaching as deep as you could. Aeri left out a cry "Fuckk~ you feel so good, Aeri" you groaned, already almost tasting the sweetness of climax.

"Ms. y/n, everything ok? The meeting is about to start" you suddenly heard Eunjoo's voice through your office phone. You panicked, trying to reach the phone without stopping what you guys were doing, which was impossible. You looked at Aeri, but she just aggressively shook her head.

"Dont stop, I-I'm close, dont you fucking stop!" she ordered in between moans, fucking herself on your cock. Fuck. You got up, carrying Aeri with you, and sat her on your desk as you pressed the speaker.

"We're al-most ready, Eunjoo!" you said, trying to sound as normal as possible, but clearly out of breath.

"I'm coming!~" Aeri whispered, hugging you tight.

"Shhh!" you whisper-yelled at her, and she bit your shoulder to keep herself quiet.

"Yeah, we're coming, just give us a minute!" And you hung up. "Jesus, you cant be saying that when somebody is literally listening, you know?!" you scolded her, the adrenaline making you fuck her harder, making her come so hard you almost thought she was gonna bite your shoulder off. But you didn't care about the pain, not as you came hard inside her, emptying yourself inside her pussy so good you felt your heart in your ears once you finished. You stayed inside her until you both were breathing normal again. Your brain felt on cloud 9. What just happened between you guys, it was such an experience. You looked at Aeri once she looked up from resting on your shoulder, and you both giggled. You moved a bit, letting her get down as you got your boxers and pants up.

"God, I don't remember the last time I came that hard" you admitted out loud, causing a giggle out of Aeri as she pushed your shoulder "Auch! careful, I think you fractured it you know?"

"Oh my God, shut up! make yourself look presentable so we can go." She told you, fixing herself in front of the mirror you had in your office.

"Go where?" you asked innocently, as you stared at her.

"To the meeting, where else?!" she said, frowning and confused at your answer. Did she fuck you into amnesia or what??

"..."

"y/n? hello?!" she shook your shoulder.

"... Oh my God?! hurry up!!" you yelled at her, rushing in between dressing up and getting your documents.

————————————————————————

Needless to say yes, you made it a few minutes late to the meeting, but the moment Aeri entered the room behind you, all eyes went to her, and you swore you heard someone gasp. Some knew that Mr. Uchinaga's daughter developed a particular interest in being properly involved in this project, probably because she started the idea. But nobody was expecting her to willingly participate in official meetings. They seemed to had forgotten you guys were late, and you were thankful for it. It made sense, though. Aeri's presence always made time feel unreal.

"Ladies, thank you for coming" one of the other managers said, trying to suppress an excited smile as she held her hands together. "Take a seat please, we were about to start".

You nodded with your head as a silent thank you, as you were about to sit next to one of your colleagues, but Aeri had a different idea, and nonchalantly pulled you by the sleeve as she walked both of you to the front, her sitting next to her dad, and you next to her. Some were a bit shocked by this, including you, but Aeri couldn't care less about other people's reaction.

————————————————————————

It really took just a taste of you for Aeri to want you almost everyday.

you guys kept having those passionate encounters, these becoming so frequent that more than two days without it was already weird for you guys. Nothing was discussed about it, you weren't official, or exclusive, and didn't think you wanted to. Or well, to be honest both of you have been enjoying whatever was going, and also busy with work, that you genuinely haven't thought too much about formalities. However, you were around so often that even her friends knew you, due to Aeri deciding that you were worthy of keeping her company even if it wasn’t related to sex (at least, for part of the night).

The group of friends already knew how casual Aeri tended to be, not being a fan of relationships nor commitment. She never really brought any of their hook ups around. So, naturally, they were a bit weirded out when they noticed that the person she had earlier introduced to them was clearly more than a friend.

“Aeri??” Ningning said, an incredulous tone in her voice “Uchinaga Aeri. Our Giselle. Getting serious? Bitch please, YOU be serious.”

“Oh fuck off.” Karina responded with a frown  before pointing at you and the Japanese girl who were moving around the dance floor “look at them. They look so.. comfortable with each other, and still-"

“That means nothing, Gigi looks comfortable with us too all the time” Ning affirmed wanting to make her point too, her arms crossed in front of her chest looking like a smartass. That’s until Minjeong caught the girls’ attention. 

“Damn, well I don’t know about you guys but Aeri has never done *that* to me” she pointed out at you two. At some point in the conversation, Aeri dragged you to a little corner, both of you probably too drunk to notice it was not that secret or away from your friends. Aeri decided she needed to kiss you, to touch you, and she couldn’t wait until she was home. Dancing with you just affected all her senses. And the taste of your lips mixed with the alcohol she had earlier was the perfect killer combination. 

“Aeri you horny ass.” NingNing said with fake disgust, while Karina was laughing her ass off and Minjeong was just staring at you guys with her mouth open “Minjeong, please, go get them before we get kicked out for indecency”

“No no give them a minute, they seem to be having fun…” the young girl said while licking her suddenly dry lips. NingNing’s fake disgust face lowkey turned into a real one. She slapped the back of Minjeong's head, and pushed her a bit.

“Bitch now!”

“Aww man you’re so boring…”

————————————————————————

"So... you and y/n, huh?" NingNing started, the other two girls staring at Aeri as she was confused.

The four girls met the morning after to have coffee together at Aeri's. Of course, without notifying her first lol. Aeri was still asleep when they got there, but you were on your way to work and opened the door for them.

"... oh- good morning, y/n" NingNing said, bowing a bit once she got out of her shock. She wasn't used to seeing Aeri's hookups stayed for the night. Karina suppressed a smile, in her eyes this was just more evidence that you and Aeri were probably growing closer.

"Good morning, girls" you responded kindly, though a bit nervous since the women in front of you looked a bit surprised to see you "Aeri said she was coming to the office later so she'll probably wake up any minute. I was on my way already, but I made some coffee! feel free to have it, just please leave some for Aeri~" you asked, and they nodded, looking at each other discreetly. You all said your goodbyes, and just as you left the big apartment, a sleepy Aeri was coming out of the room, only using her panties and a shirt that clearly didn't belong to her. She was calling your name, her husky voice sounding rather sweet, which made her friends give each other looks again.

Now the three of them were sitting on the couch, drinking the coffee, while Minjeong terrorized Aeri's fridge.

"Me and y/n what?" Aeri asked her back as she took a sip of the coffee you made, a satisfied noise escaping her lips. Just the way she liked it.

"Don't play dumb, bitch. What's going on between you two."

"Yeah, you bring her around often, you dont kick her out before morning. You use her clothes to sleep!" Karina highlighted, using her fingers to enumerate.

"She even knows how to make your coffee! that's cute!" Minjeong yelled from the kitchen, a little hard to understand 'cause her mouth was full of sandwich.

"Swallow your food before speaking!" NingNing scolded pointing at Minjeong, who frowned at her.

"No!"

Ning tsked, and got up to scold Minjeong a bit more (and steal some food herself), making the blonde girl pout.

"I don't know why you guys are so surprised. She's good company and a good fuck, nothing less and nothing more." She assured her friends, not wanting this conversation to become such a big deal.

"Hey, isn't this your birth control?" Minjeong said after picking up a medicine box that was on the floor next to the couch. Aeri gasped, she had forgotten where she left it.

"Shit, thanks baby." Aeri said, making her way to the kitchen.

"Are you seeing other people besides y/n?" Karina asked, joining her friends in the kitchen and getting some fruit for herself. Aeri shook her head "Then why are you taking these?"

She looked at her three friends, raising her eyebrows with a look that explained everything without needing words (Author too lazy to make this explaining g!p scene, they got it and were like oh :0 and then didn't care.)

"Lately I've been so busy with work that I keep forgetting everything" she said nonchalantly as she got some water and swallow the pill.

"Be careful, Uchinaga. You know with these things you can't just be silly and forgetful" Karina reminded her, a frown in her face as she watched her friend take the medication.

"Relax, It's not like I'm gonna get pregnant." Aeri laughed at her friends, they worried too much sometimes.

————————————————————————

"So... apparently I'm pregnant." Aeri confessed the next time the four friends were together in her apartment.

The three women in front of her in her living room went quiet, as if not moving nor breathing could make what their friend just suddenly dropped not real.

"... huh?" Minjeong was the first to speak, her voice high pitched and shaking, not sure if she heard right, if Aeri was foreal, or real, or if anything was real.

Aeri looked at her friends, not even sure how to explain it. She herself couldn't believe how careless she fucking was with those stupid pills.

(Flashback ig)

You and Aeri hadn't seen each other in so long (literally two weeks only), you went away with a group as representatives of the company to this important event, having a lot of work before and after the trip. Aeri had been texting you often about missing having you in her bed. So when you finally coincided in the company, she needed you. Right there and then. You saw each her on an empty hallway, shocked to finally be on each other's presence, and almost ran to hug you. You giggled a bit, thinking the reaction was cute, and a little unfamiliar coming from her. You thought she was gonna drag you to her office, but Aeri had a different, riskier idea. Looking around to make sure nobody was seeing you, she pulled you inside a janitor's closet (haha classic jade-jini).

"Wow, I missed you too" you said, laughing while she locked the door. This reminded you a bit of that time a cousin of yours told you her and her lover once did it on a janitor's closet, what was the girlfriend's name? Sana, was it? anyways.

"Why the fuck did you have to go on that trip?" Aeri complained, as she quickly started undoing your pants, kissing you before you could even answer. You held her face, sighing as you realized how much you missed those lips.

"It means they're trusting me more, it's a good thing" you said against her lips as you made her sit somewhere, getting comfortable between her legs. Your hands traveled to her buttoned up shirt, wanting to rip it off her but deciding not to.

"I hope that doesn't mean you'll be away for this long often." she pouted, making you giggle. Once her chest was exposed, you immediately went to one of her nipples, sucking on it thirstily. Aeri moaned at the feeling of your tongue against such sensitive skin, one hand caressing your hair while the other one was masturbating you, your member getting harder and harder in her hand.

Both of you needed to compensate for the wasted time, and let's say nobody saw you for a while.

.

.

“More..” she moaned in your ear as she softly grabbed the back of your head “harder”. You could feel Aeri again getting tighter around your dick, reaching for her climax once more.

“If I go harder you’re gonna get louder again, we can’t get caught like this, can we?”

“We both know you’d be the one getting loud. Out of everybody with a dick that I’ve fucked before, nobody gets as whiny and moans like you.

“Hmm..” you groaned at her teasing “I don’t wanna hear about the other people you’ve fucked”

“Don’t worry, you’re probably in my top of decent hookups anyways” she said with a mischievous smile, clearly trying to tease you even more.

“Not even one of the best?” You asked as a pout adorned your lips, your hips not stopping the pace you marked, but knowing you’ll go faster if she didn't stop teasing you.

“Hmm, we’ll see. Maybe, if you listen more, maybe.” Lies, you were the best she’s ever had and she knew it, but Aeri was not gonna admit that to you. "Be a good girl, and fuck me harder. I know you wanna come inside me again" she whispered in your ear, to then bite it softly. You grabbed her by her ass, going so hard on her you could both feel tears in your eyes. You weren't sure how many orgasms you had given each other already, but you were so sensitive. It just felt too good. Aeri felt herself coming just as you emptied yourself inside her once again, filling her up to the point you were going to have to clean the floor once you finally finished your intense encounter. But who gives a shit? you felt amazing inside her. It was like an addiction.

A dangerous addiction, because as mentioned before, with so much work and things in her mind, Aeri didn't exactly prioritize her strict schedule to take her birth control pills.

Fucking great. Fucking genius.

And that's why, sooner than later, she started feeling constant nausea the following month, not to mention how her period decided to not show up that month either. Expired food? stress? please God literally anything but that? that's what was rushing through her mind as she waited for the 5 pregnancy tests to show the result. And they all showed the same.

Fucking positive. Congrats, Aeri!

"Oh my God.. Oh my God?!!" she screamed from her bathroom.

.

.

Aeri decided not to go to the company for a couple days. She needed some peace, some space. After not seeing her for two days, you contacted her, but she simply responded with being too busy with 'stuff'. You decided not to push, even though you wanted to see her, and not just to fuck. But you knew you had no right to ask much from her. You guys weren't really 'a thing', so, what to do. Whenever you missed her you'd just sigh, and do your best to focus on the mountain of work you had.

A few days had passed since she took the pregnancy tests, and that's how now she was in front of her best friends, giving them the news.

"WHAT THE FUCK UCHINAGA?!" Karina screamed, getting up her chair as she started anxiously walking around the room, her hands shaking, going to her hair, chaos I dont know "I FUCKIN TOLD YOU, I TOLD YOU TO BE CAREFUL OR THIS WAS GONNA HAPPEN! OHH-"

Aeri looked at her friend, not knowing how to respond to it, but probably Karina wasn't gonna listen anyways.

"No no no no no this can't be happening!" Minjeong repeated over and over again, hugging her knees to her chest as she rocked herself.

NingNing was just speechless looking at nothing, her mouth making a big O.

"I thought i jinxed it, I thought I could make it go away, but naaah!"

"We're too young for this we're too young for this we're too y-" she could hear Minjeong from the floor.

"What are you gonna do? what are we gonna do?! have you told your dad? how about y/n? WHERE EVEN IS Y/N RIGHT NOW, HUH? HUH?!" Karina scolded, and Aeri started to feel too overwhelmed.

"I don't know!" Aeri snapped back, her voice breaking, a sign that she was going to start crying. This made her friends react and look at her. Silence was dominating the apartment again, that's until a sob involuntarily escaped Aeri. "I-I don't know what to do. I didn't plan for this to happen, I don't know how I was so stupid to forget" She said in between sobs, shaking and crying in such a way that broke the three girls' hearts. They quickly rushed to hug her, trying to comfort her. She was their friend, their sister. It didn't matter what happened, they would always be there for her.

"Hey, hey, it's ok." NingNing said as she caressed the girl's hair. "we're here for you, no matter what. You're not alone in this, Gigi."

"Yeah, we'll always be here, no matter what you choose to do... but what do you think you'd really want to do?" Karina asked, letting the girl rest on her shoulder.

"I dont know.." Aeri responded with a soft string of voice "I don't think I wanna get rid of it, you know?" she confessed, making her friends looked at each other a bit shocked, but they weren't lying when they said they'd support her no matter what.

"Then I guess it's time to start going to auntie classes so we can be ready" Karina joked, getting a soft giggle from Ningning and Minjeong,and a smile from her friend, whose eyes were still covered in tears.

"I mean, at least you know two things for sure" Minjeong said, making her friends look at her curiously "the baby's gonna be born rich AND good looking." she continued with a smile. This made her friends laugh, which they all really needed at the moment "but foreal, though. You'd be a great mommy, if that's what you end up deciding on, we promise to always make sure you guys are ok."

"Thank you guys" Aeri said, sincerity filling her words as she cuddled more with her sisters.

"Have you told y'n about this?" NingNing asked once she noticed the girl stopped shaking so much. Aeri just shook her head.

"No, we haven't talked in a couple days".

"Why?" Minjeong asked curiously. " You genuinely seem to enjoy having her around."

"I just needed some space to process all this" she expressed, pointing at her belly. Minjeong nodded at her words, understanding.

"How about your dad?" Karina questioned carefully. Aeri just sighed.

"I guess I'll have to go visit and deliver the news..."

————————————————————————

"I'm so glad you came to see me, dear" Aeri's dad said as he placed some tea for him and his daughter in the little coffee table between them. They were currently in the big garden in his house. "when I asked y/n where were you and she said she hadn't seen you in the office in days, and when I called you and you said you just didn't feel like going, after being so involved in your project. I mean, I know you're a free spirit, but" he softly giggled with his raspy voice.

The mention of y/n made her heart jump. She still haven't contacted you. In these days that she hasn't seen you, she hoped the words and courage to tell you about the pregnancy would sprout. But they didn't.

"I just needed some days off, dad" Aeri started, trying her best to cover the nerve-wracking fear in her voice "Something really big happened and.. and I just needed to process it."

"Hmm? What do you mean, darling?" the man asked, taking a sip of his cup.

“I’m not really sure how to explain this…” the young girl murmured, looking at her father as he put the cup down, looking at his daughter with a frown, worried. Very worried.

"Aeri, whatever happened, you can talk to your dad about it. I'm here for you, my love" Mr. Uchinaga said, offering his daughter a smile. Aeri breathed in and out, thinking she should just be done with it. There was no point on dancing around the subject.

"Dad... I'm pregnant." she finally said "You're gonna be a grandpa" she also added with a bittersweet intent of a smirk, hoping she made it sound at least a bit better.

"...What?!" didn't seem to work- "A.. a baby? oh Aeri that's- I mean-" he was so speechless. I mean of course he loved the idea of being a grandpa one day, but he didn't think it would happen so soon, and he expected to see a ring on his daughter's finger first. Why was she telling him this alone? "Darling that's.. I mean it's great of course but.. I didn't know you had this in your plans I mean.. so soon after college?" the old man was going through a series of millions of emotions, all rushing through his mind.

"I know it's very shocking but-" the young girl tried to speak.

"Was this something you even had in mind? You didnt even tell me you were with somebody" but it didn't look like her dad was listening much at the moment.

"Well, not exactly but-" She was feeling more and more overwhelmed by the second.

"Did you even plan for this?!" he insisted, his own forehead feeling sweaty as the realization hit.

"No I didn't plan for this, dad, ok?! but it happened and I-I'm trying to take responsibility about it and deal with it how I can, and I'd really appreciate if you could please, please calm down a bit and let me at least speak."

"Calm down?! my youngest daughter is pregnant! Not married, not even compromised, but with a baby on the way and the father nowhere to be seen in this house!" he snapped, as if asking him to tone it down a bit was absurd "you wanna talk to me about responsibility? hm?! responsibility would've been avoiding a situation like this. THAT would've been responsible."

Silence covered the place, the echo of their voices resonating against the wall, accompanied by their unstable breathing. Aeri felt so fragile and small in front of her father. He saw hurting in her eyes, and he hated the idea of ever making her kids feel this way.

"He could've at least come see me with you, you know?." Mr. Uchinaga then said, a much more calm tone in his voice now, and less accusatory too.

"I-I can't bring this person, dad. At least not yet.."

“Don’t tell me you don’t even know who the father is…” the old man pleaded, and Aeri shook her head.

“Oh I know who it is, dad, please. And you know her well too”

“…her?” Mr. Uchinaga repeated, clearly confused. Aeri sighed, and signaled for him to sit next to her on the couch inside.

“Please sit down for a moment, dad”

————————————————————————

“I can't believe it. And she looked so shy at first" Mr. Uchinaga clicked his tongue. "And she put that baby there?!"

Aeri had explained to her dad that you were the other parent of the baby she was expecting. At first he was shocked, I mean yeah he thought about how you could be a good partner for his daughter. You had a good future, a good job (at HIS company mind you.), brains, you seemed like a very kind-hearted girl, and he could tell you guys had a lot of chemistry. But never in a million years he thought you were gonna get her pregnant, asshole.

“Dont say it like that, and yes. She's the mom. As I said, she's the only person I've been seeing." Aeri explained.

“I didn’t know you guys were together”

“We aren’t” Aeri murmured, and quickly regretted it knowing how worse it sounded that she was not only pregnant before getting married but pregnant to somebody she didn’t even consider her official partner. Her dad raised an eyebrow, not liking what he was hearing. Again.

“No no, wait! We are- We are together. We just didn’t really… plan for *this* to happen” Aeri said, trying to fix the answer she gave. "But yeah, we are together and.. serious, yeah." The man nodded, kinda buying what his daughter said, kinda not.

“Well, now you two are going to have to get married” he proclaimed after finishing his cup of tea. Aeri almost choked on hers.

“Married?!” her dad had said it so calmly that it took her a second to process what he even said.

"Yes." he responded as if it was the most obvious thing. "You guys are having a baby, Aeri. You know how it can look if you have it without being married. Plus if you guys are already together and serious, then why not? it was just a matter of time."

Aeri felt her pressure going up and down. Marriage?! hell nah.

"Marriage wasn't in our plans either, dad, and you know how I feel about it."

"I want you to bring her here so we can all talk about this. This is a family situation now, and if she's the mom of your kid, then that makes her family whether you like it or not." the older man stated firmly. Aeri was massaging her temple, knowing her dad wouldn't take a no for an answer, but she just wasn't ready to talk to you about all this.

"Dad I don't think this is-"

"You are bringing her here, Aeri. End of discussion."

————————————————————————

Aeri could feel the panic traveling through her whole body.

She was sitting on the couch, waiting for you. Her leg bouncing impatiently. You were gonna be there any minute. She was feeling so impatient, and at the same time was praying something could rip time and space so she'd never have to have this conversation with you.

"This is ridiculous. We’re not even dating, I haven't even told her about the baby, and now I have to also bring her to my family home to talk about marriage?!" Aeri thought out loud, clicking her tongue at how unbelievable her situation was "How am I supposed to do this?!"

"Do what?" A random ass Minjeong casually asked as she came out of Aeri's room.

"JESUS!" the japanese girl screamed, her already accelerated heart almost jumping out of her "what the fuck, Minjeong?? how long have you been here?!"

"About two, three hours maybe. I came to see you but you were gone so I made myself something to eat and then passed out in your comfy comfy bed" the blonde girl yawned, stretching her arms.

"You guys are too comfortable coming to my apartment." Aeri complained, but the younger girl just smiled at her.

"It's called being family." she replied, sticking her tongue out "anyways, did you bring anything? I'm starving" Minjeong added as she rubbed her tummy.

"No I didn't bring shit and you need to leave, y/n is coming any minute and-"

*knock knock* (like Twice)

The two girls looked at each other, Aeri already feeling her hands shaking.

"I think she's here" Minjeong said, and Aeri rolled her eyes as she walked to open the door, you were outside with a takeout bag.

"You think?!" Aeri exclaimed, sarcastically. But Minjeong didn't catch the tone.

"Yes yes! She's right there! Hi y/n~" the blonde girl pointed and then waved at you, with a big smile on her face. You were a bit lost but reciprocated her smile, it was too cute to not be contagious.

"Hi Jeongie~" you replied as you entered the apartment, whispering a little 'hi' to the owner, who simply gave a little smirk. You could already tell she wasn't in the best mood.

When Aeri texted you earlier, she wasn't really clear about what was the reason she suddenly contacted you, asking you to come to her apartment. It has been days since the last time you two spoke. At first you thought maybe she was finally free with whatever it was that kept her so busy, and wanted to have some fun with you again, but when she mentioned that she actually needed to talk to you about something important, you worried that maybe something bad happened. When you asked for details, she simply replied with "We'll talk once you're here, just come. Please.. I need you here."

So you quickly picked up a jacket and your keys, stopping for some food on your way to her place. Something from a restaurant Aeri mentioned multiple times before. How sweet of you.

"What you got in there? it smells amazing" Minjeong curiously asked as she freed your hands. You sat on the couch as you witnessed the little blonde thief undoing the bag.

"It's just some pasta with-"

"Oh! my favorite!" you heard her said from the kitchen, as she took the first bite, satisfied with the flavorful taste.

"I thought it was Aeri's favorite" you pointed at the mentioned girl, who just shook her hand.

"She was gonna say 'my favorite' no matter what you had in there" Aeri explained, and you simply nodded as your mouth did a O.

"I'm gonna get this out of your way, you guys are gonna be too busy to eat anyways. I'll be on my way!" Minjeong quickly said as she made her way to the door, your bag now becoming her dinner.

"Wait- but the food!-" you tried to stop her but it was too late.

"Byeeee!" and with that, she closed the apartment door behind her. You sighed, just accepting that you were going to have to order delivery now.

"Wow~ she really left with it. What are we gonna eat now?!" you asked in between giggles, but Aeri seemed to stay serious even after her friend's shenanigans.

"Don't worry about it, I'm sure you'll lose your appetite in a minute." You stopped laughing, now looking at her a bit worried. You could see in her face, whatever the reason was for you to be there right now, it was clearly important.

"What's going on, Aeri? did something happen, are you ok?" you questioned, softly holding her arm as she sat next to you.

"I'm ok.. well, kinda." She tried to explain, but that answer didn't help at all.

"Just tell me what is it, I'm here ok? whatever it is you need help with, you can count on me" you smiled at her, hoping you could give her some comfort. It couldn't be that bad, right?

"y/n..." Aeri took a deep breath. 'here goes nothing..' she thought.

right?

"I'm pregnant..." Aeri finally said, doing her best for her voice not too shake as much as her hands.

"..."

"y/n..? Did you hear what I said?" she asked, shaking you a bit as you stared at her, your face completely absent of any thought or emotion.

"..."

————————————————————————

"Pregnant... PREGNANT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN PREGNANT? WHAT DOES SHE MEAN PREGNANT? HOW THE FUCK? WHEN THE FUCK? Oh my God but she said she was on the pill?!!!! How the fuck did I let this happen? I'm gonna be a parent?! But I'm too young... my parents are gonna kill me.. HER DAD IS GONNA KILL ME. DOES HE KNOW ALREADY?! I would be dead if he knew..."

————————————————————————

"So.. you're pregnant." You said, still not fully processing what the girl in front of you had told you. After Aeri told you about her pregnancy, you passed out for a bit, not really sure how long. So she used the 'making you smell alcohol' method, and had some water for you.

"Yes." Aeri said, sitting next to you on the couch, face to face.

"And it's mine" You said, almost as a question.

"It might surprise you but all this time I've only been sleeping with you, so yes, it's very yours."

"And.. are you.. gonna keep it?" you asked, as careful as possible but bitch, how you ask something like that?? Aeri looked at you like she couldn't believe your shit.

"Are you fuckin serious right now?"

"Wha- i think this is a very valid question!" you tried to defend yourself, your hands up.

"This is ridiculous, what do you think, y/n?!" ok clearly the answer was obvious. And you felt so bad for asking such thing.

"Ok ok I'm sorry!" you apologized, panic clear in you "Jesus, I didn't mean for it to sound like that, i just meant that it is your body and your decision, and whatever you decide i support you and I'm here for you and honestly i don't hate the idea of having a baby but i just didn't think it was gonna happen during these circumstances! I never planned for it!"

"And you think i planned for this?!" she yelled at you as she stood up, feeling like you were accusing her.

"That's not what I'm saying!" but you just felt like crying.

"I know that's not what you're saying! but what you said earlier wasn't a good response either!" you stood up as well, feeling so overwhelmed with this argument. You hated arguments.

"Well I'm sorry then!" you yelled, matching her tone. Your breathing felt irregular, just like her. For a second, there was just silence "...I'm sorry"

Aeri looked at you, and as reality hit both of you once again, she looked like she was really gonna cry, so you quickly wrapped her in your arms, letting her be as vulnerable as she needed. She sobbed against your chest, and you felt your heart shake. It pained you, seeing her so.. scared and fragile. And you hated thinking that any of your words made it worse.

"I'm so sorry." you repeated as you held here in your arms, caressing her hair and back "I'm here ok? I'm here with you, and I'm not leaving. We're together in this. We're ok, it's gonna be ok."

You felt her nodding against your chest, still crying. So you kissed the top of her head, letting her take her time. After some minutes, she looked up at you, and you looked back at those beautiful dark eyes.

"I feel insane, being so.. scared, but not hating the idea of having a baby, you know?" she voiced, with a bittersweet shadow of a laugh.

"...I don't hate the idea of having a baby, either." you confessed, catching her a bit off guard, but it seemed to have been a good answer "plus, if it's with you, they're gonna come out beautiful" a sweet smile adorning your lips as you mentioned this, which made Aeri smile as well as roll her eyes "I'm here, Aeri. and I'll be here when that baby's born. I know we've never really discussed what we are and I know you didn't mean for it to become anything serious… but I am here. For and with you. I promise."

Aeri stared at you in silence, feeling moved by your words. She really needed to hear that from you. Your embrace, the honesty and determination in your voice and eyes, it made her feel... safe.

Then she remembered what her dad had told her.

"Yeah, about that…" she said, separating from you and playing with her hands. You looked at her confused. Was there something else she hasnt mentioned? surely it couldn't compare to the baby, right?

"My dad wants to talk to you, so we gotta go to his home"

... right?!

"And it's related to... marriage." she finished, now anxiously playing with the ends of her hair.

"…" silence. Your mind felt like it exploded.

"Hello??" Aeri shook you by the shoulder when she noticed you were paralyzed once more. The girl clicked her tongue, what a bad habit of yours "why do you always do this?"

"I'm jumping through the window."

"Get in the car, y/n."

————————————————————————

Things didn't go easy with Mr. Uchinaga. So much scolding, the speech about how you guys were careless like two teenagers, and the marriage conversation. Ouh the tension was ugly. But trying to be positive, it didn't go that bad either. After so much yelling, you guys seemed to have touched a good nerve. The old man didn't dislike the idea of being a grandpa anyways, and at least you weren't some good for nothing. He liked you for his daughter, he just wished you guys didn't do it this way. But what was done was done. You all got to an agreement, as in you told him kinda what he wanted to hear, and bought Aeri and you some time to really figure things out. You guys grew fond of each other since the moment you met of course, and you had a strong attraction too (clearly), but you two never really.. thought of a relationship, let alone marriage. And a kid didn't change that either (for now MUAHAHAHA). You brought Aeri back to her place after talking with her dad, you two were currently sitting on the couch, staring at the ceiling.

"What are we gonna do, y/n?" she asked, and you could feel the emotions in her voice. The doubts. The confusion. The fear.

"I don't know..." you answered sincerely, trying to find the words to comfort her. "But that's ok, Aeri. We're together in this."

"y/n, we're not even dating, how do you think this feels?" she questioned you, making you look at her as you stayed quiet for a bit.

"...But we could."

"What?" she asked, not sure what she heard.

"C'mon, why not give it a proper try? we're having a kid. I don't think it's gonna kill neither of us to see how it feels to be a couple. We can start by being girlfriends!" you suggested, your excited tone made her giggle "or! if you want, we can start easier. I'll court you or whatever is called. I'll win your affection!"

"what, you're gonna take me on dates? I think we already skipped a few steps here, didn't we?" she said sarcastically, pointing at her tummy.

"Hey, we gotta start somewhere if we're going to maybe get married! just because the final level is already happening doesn't mean we can't enjoy the.. side quests..?"

" the side quests?" she repeated, trying her best not to laugh.

"Listen, you know I'm not good with my words sometimes, but I'm trying, ok?" you replied, a pout on your face that made her finally laugh "What I'm trying to say is, I'd like to treat you to these things we didn't do before we started what we had. Who knows, maybe exploring these things together will help us take a decision about how our relationship will be. Maybe we'll see new sides of each other that we can learn to you know, embrace and more. I'm more than open to it, and if you need time, then I'll be as patient as you need me to be."

Aeri listened to you with a soft smile on her face. You were so sweet sometimes. With anybody else, she'd probably feel like throwing up. But hearing these words from you... it made her heart feel different. It felt good, and warm, and comfortable.

"You are sooo cheesy, y/f/n." she teased. You dramatically got up and started walking to the bedroom, surprising her but making her laugh once again.

"You're sleeping on the couch tonight for that comment!"

————————————————————————

It didn't take long for you guys to grow even closer. I mean, you were already comfortable with each other so, honestly, you just needed to break that barrier that was stopping you from opening your hearts and welcome each other more into your lives. For you it was rather easy, you were such a lover girl. But Aeri... you knew it was gonna take some work, but you didn't mind. Honestly, you were happy with it being a slow process. It felt like.. somehow really close friends, but so much more to each other. Still, it felt so hard to give it a name.

But Aeri was so grateful you wouldn't push or rush her. You really were there for her without expecting anything. Aeri even felt comfortable enough to go back to the company, and you'd spend your lunch together basically everyday again. And thus, the sweet laughs from your office came back. Mr. Uchinaga would hear them sometimes whenever he was around that floor, and he'd just shake his head, a smile threatening his lips.

————————————————————————

So going back to what we’re here for. breastfeeding kink (😭). It started rather earlier in Aeri's pregnancy. And she, or well, her tits would get so so sensitive. She wasn’t sure how to deal with it until a light bulb appeared on top of her head; you, as her (un)official partner, were obliged to help her with her struggle. I mean after all it was your fault she was going through it.

Yeah, she saw it once in a video. Hey! don't judge her. She was trying to find some information about how to deal with the sensitivity in her breast, and ended up in very.. graphic websites. But anyways, Aeri knew she needed to get that milk out of her body. But there was no baby yet, until

“Hi baby!” She said with a very suspicious and big smile as she stood next to you the moment you entered her office. You looked at her with a raised eyebrow. Aeri normally doesn’t call you by any pet name, at least not outside the bed.

“Hello?” you answered with a slow, careful tone. Aeri had called you earlier that day to discuss something about a doctor’s appointment, but of course, she forgot she did. Now she was simply staring at you, still smiling. You sighed, knowing where this was probably going “Ok, what is it?”

“Oh, nothing~” she sang in a very fake innocent tone.

“Aeri…” you said with a threatening-but-not-really tone, just wanting her to admit whatever it is she needed you for this time.

“Nothing that you wouldn’t enjoy” she corrected herself. For a second, though, she looked up reconsidering her thoughts “well, hopefully.”

————————————————————————

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” You asked her, needing confirmation once again.

Aeri had sat you down on her office couch, massaging your shoulders as she straddled you. Your hands were tied up and resting against your chest. That was for no particular reason, Aeri just thought it was hot. She started speaking in a relaxed (relaxing) tone, explaining what she needed from you. The idea of sucking on her titties right there and then was an offer you wouldn’t even have to consider once, you’d just do it. But she did need to let you know why she needed it so bad right now, even though you never asked for an explanation when it came to stuff like that. Once she mentioned her breast had started producing milk though, your thoughts slowed down a bit, and you started to seriously listen to her words. She explained how her body, specially her chest, was very sensitive. And she really, really needed your help.

This was a completely new experience for you. You've never really experimented much kinky stuff before in your life, the riskiest things you've done have been the almost daily occasional sex at the office with Aeri. So naturally you felt a bit nervous a first.

However.

Once Aeri started slowly undoing her shirt, her tits looking even bigger, more appetizing than usual... your mouth got so watery and your brain felt funny, you didn't need to think about it too much. There was something about Aeri lately, you wanted to take care of each and every need she had, both in and out of bed. Maybe it was the closeness between you guys now, 'cause whether you guys admitted it or not, she was yours and you were hers. Or maybe it was the pregnancy hormones. I mean of course they affected her, she was the one pregnant- but it also affected you. You wanted to make sure she was ok, happy, satisfied, all the time. Like it was your mission in life. And you had to be honest, you desired her even more everyday.

"I'm sure, yes" she answered, her voice so soft in your ears, so sexy "Do you wanna back off? I can untie you-"

"No!" you quickly interrupted, not expecting to sound so desperate. Aeri looked at you with a raised eyebrow, finding your reaction so entertaining. You cleared your throat before speaking again "Don't look at me like that, I just wanna help if this is really what you need. You know how much I like helping you... relax" you said in a suggestive way, Aeri catching your little reference. She let a soft laugh at your comment.

"Right, I know." her hands opened her shirt, getting her chest closer to your face as she pressed down on your lap, moving against your already hard member. You groaned softly, lifting your hips a bit, wanting to be inside her already, but Aeri shook her head, patting your head.

"Ah ah ah~" she stated "You give me what I need, I'll give you what YOU need. Needy baby."

You pouted at her teasing, but simply nodded as you started kissing and sucking on her nipple. Aeri hissed, the familiar feeling of your tongue against her sensitive skin hitting just right. She could feel her clogged breast finding some relief in your mouth. Her moans didn't wait either, but her volume was the least of her worries, she was too focused on your lips.

Aeri looked down, the image of you sucking on her tits turning her on tremendously. You looked up at her, your cute puppy eyes shining as you eagerly sucked and taste the sweet liquid coming out of her. God, if you knew how good this was, you would've thought about getting her pregnant earlier.

"You s-seem to be enjoying yourself, aren't you?" Aeri mumbled between moans, her mouth slightly open as she tried to stabilize her breathing. "Does it taste that good?".

You felt on cloud 9, your body and mind discovering new feelings as you swallow the girl's sweetness.

"It's so good... tastes so good." you forced yourself to stop for a moment to speak, a drop of milk on the corner of you lips as you licked them, feeling yourself getting thirstier than before. Like a whiny baby, your begging eyes were asking her to let you please her more, you kept thrusting your hips up, making her feel your neediness against her clothed core. Aeri clicked her tongue, but the truth is she needed you just as much. Urgently freeing your cock from your pants, she sat on it, tightly gripping on your shoulders as your big size stretched her. You wanted to growl at the pleasure you were feeling, you could never get used to the way Aeri's tight pussy felt around your cock. So warm, welcoming, so wet. It was just perfect. And Aeri loved it just as much, no matter how often you guys fucked, you always stretched her so good, the perfect mix of pleasure and a pinch of pain. It drove her insane each time.

"Why d-did you stop?! I didn't tell you to stop" she groaned, pushing your head back to her breasts. You quickly went back to your task, you tongue feeling tingly. You wanted to hold Aeri tight against your body, knowing your thrusts could go faster. But if she wanted you like this, completely under her control, then you were more than ok with it. Adrenaline was overtaking you completely. You were happy it was lunch time and the floor was mostly empty 'cause there was no way that somebody outside couldn't hear what was going on inside that office. Between skin slapping against skin and Aeri's loud moans, the room was a mess of obscene noises.

"Ah! just like that~" Aeri would cry as you hit the right spot "Fuck, yeah.. right there, y/n.."

"Yeah? Does my cock make you feel good?" you groaned against her breast, swallowing and letting your tongue make a mess with her oversensitive nipples. Your fast, rough pace was ruining Aeri's mind. She could feel how hot and hard you were inside her.

"Mhmmm fuuuck, baby~" Aeri felt tears in her eyes 'cause of how good you were fucking her. She loved giving herself to you 'cause you really knew how to treat her right, how to make her feel like she was reaching heaven. She half-opened her eyes, just to see how some of her milk was going down your chin, and she felt herself getting so so close to her climax "Please don't stop, please don't stop" she begged in between whimpers.

"Fuck.. I wanna come, Aeri" you said, your focused expression almost looking like you were in pain. You wanted to make her finish first, but you were just so turned on, and she felt so good on your dick, and the taste of her milk in your mouth. You weren't gonna last much longer. That didn't mean you wouldn't keep going for her though "hmm I wanna come inside you, please.."

It almost sounded like you were asking for permission, as if whatever she said was orders for you. And it was like that in the moment, and Aeri knew it. Her hands traveled to your face, kissing you deeply, almost stealing the air from your lungs. At the same time, she started riding you even faster than before, making you moan and whine.

"Fuck, Aeri.. more.. please~" you repeated over and over again, until you finally came so so hard, filling her up 'till you couldn't anymore. It felt beyond good, your thighs were shaking under her, and you could barely open your eyes. But Aeri didn't stop. The feeling of your cum inside her pushed her closer and closer. You were surprisingly still hard, and she needed to come. She fucked herself on your dick, focused on nothing but reaching her sweet climax as well. "Aeri, w-wait.. not so fast p-please, I'm-" you couldn't even speak properly. Your dick was so sensitive, and she was overstimulating you.

"S-shut up... fuck~ you g-get to come, and I don't? I don't think so.. ah.. fuck, so good~" she said in between desperate moans, her forehead sweaty. You couldn't even argue, you'd be crazy to. So with tears in your eyes because of how sensitive you felt, you enjoyed the painful pleasure her tight pussy gave you. "Close.. fucking close.." she gasped, her whimpers getting higher and higher as she came undone on top of you, almost sounding like she wanted to cry 'cause of how good her orgasm hit her.

Once your breathings became normal, you looked at each other, and couldn't help but laugh at the realization of the things you've done. You looked at her, and you wondered how somebody could get more and more beautiful every time you looked at them.

"Can you.. untie me now? my wrists hurt a bit."

————————————————————————

"I'd do anything for you, you know?" You whispered as you caressed her hair. Aeri was lying on your chest, comfortably resting and listening to your heartbeat, only your jacket covering her.

"It's not like fucking me is a challenge for you, is it?" she muttered, making your chest elevate a bit as you giggled.

"True, but I didn't mean just that. I wanna make you happy, I wanna be here for you always. I think.." you carefully considered your words before speaking out loud, but there was no doubt in you "I think I've fallen hard for you, Aeri"

Aeri stopped breathing for a moment, processing your sudden confession. She could feel her heart happily jumping against her chest, making way for a warm, cozy, beautiful sensation to travel everywhere through her body.

"I think I've fallen just as hard, if not even harder."

————————————————————————

The closer you and Aeri got, there was no denying how much you started to feel for each other. There was so much more than just passion between you two. In short time you guys were already calling each other "girlfriend", and surprisingly you'd catch Aeri giggling and giving you dreamy smiles whenever you refer to her as that. After a few months, the f word was already being used.

Fuck.

KIDDING! Fiancée lol

Mr. Uchinaga didn't need to insist or push you guys, because once you let your barriers down and open your hearts to each other, there was no stopping what was happening between you two. So eventually, you proposed to Aeri. You guys started basically living together a while back when you became official, so you prepared the apartment one afternoon. You did it in private first of course, not wanting to put any pressure on her about it, even though her answer felt obvious. But after the "yes", the kisses, the crying, and the celebration in the bed, you planned on doing a nice dinner with friends and family soon. Even though you guys already knew the news, you couldn't help but to cry again as everybody screamed and celebrated in the restaurant.

And of course, the day of the wedding, tears and tears as you put the ring on her finger, kissing her knuckles and then sharing the sweetest kiss ever. The crowd exploded in applauses and congratulations.

"My shaylaa~" you heard Karina cry next to you guys.

"You and Minjeong when, Jimin?" NingNing teased, and Karina pushed her while trying to dry her tears. Minjeong was just sobbing like a baby while clapping, so happy for her sister.

"When are we eating the cake?"

————————————————————————————————————————————————

Once in your bed after the wedding, resting on each other's arms after a passionate encounter that could probably make Aeri pregnant if she already wasn't- you guys were cuddling and talking about life, about the honeymoon, and about the future as a family.

“So how are we gonna tell our kid that we created them in a janitor’s closet?”

“Why the fuck would we ever tell them that?”

.

.

.

I swear this was supposed to be a short thing about sucking boobies and milk and- yeah anyways goodnight.

[wendichester]

.ೃ࿔*:･ safety distance²,

summary. sammy's left for stanford and dean loves to play to overprotective older brother role

pairing. s1!stanford!dean winchester x reader genre. fluff ; college au

wordcount. 777

notes. was thinking of maybe doing a part 3? 👀

⋆.˚ ★— read part 1

The sun hangs low in the sky, warm and lazy, casting golden streaks over Stanford’s campus. The grass is cool beneath you, the scent of freshly cut blades lingering in the air. Your textbooks are open, notes sprawled across your lap, but you haven’t gotten through a single page in the last twenty minutes.

Because Dean Winchester is a menace.

He lounges beside you, one arm propped behind his head, the other tossing a small pebble up and down like it’s the most interesting thing in the world. His jacket is long discarded, sleeves rolled up to his forearms, and he’s got that same damn smirk on his lips—the one that tells you he knows exactly how distracting he is.

"Are you always this disruptive?" you ask, glancing at him over the edge of your book.

Dean lifts a brow, looking far too pleased with himself. "Disruptive? Sweetheart, I’d say I’m enhancing your study session."

You let out a dramatic sigh, flicking a piece of grass at him. "Yeah, sure. ‘Cause relentless teasing and completely derailing my focus is so helpful."

He grins. "Exactly. Studying is bad for your health. Stress levels, blood pressure—y’know, all that science stuff."

You shake your head, biting back a smile. He’s ridiculous. Infuriating. And yet… the warmth in your chest is impossible to ignore.

And Dean—well, he tells himself he’s still here because of Sam. That’s the whole reason he came to Palo Alto in the first place, right? To keep an eye on his kid brother. Make sure nothing supernatural was creeping in on Sam’s new life.

But if that were really true, then why is he here? Sitting next to you, watching the way the wind catches your hair, throwing out lame excuses just to hear you laugh?

He refuses to answer that question.

Instead, he reaches over and plucks your pen from your fingers, twirling it effortlessly.

"You’re impossible," you mutter, reaching for it.

Dean grins and holds it just out of reach. "Nah. Just charming."

Before you can retaliate, your phone buzzes between you. You glance down, and Dean watches as your expression softens. His easy smirk falters slightly when he catches the name on the screen.

Sammy.

Shit.

You pick up without hesitation, tucking the phone between your ear and shoulder. "Hey, you."

Dean watches, heart hammering as if he’s the one caught sneaking around. Which, technically, he is—but not in the way Sam would ever guess.

"Hey," Sam’s voice crackles through the speaker. "Where are you? I was gonna grab coffee before heading back to the dorm—figured I’d see if you wanted to meet up."

Dean’s stomach drops.

Oh, hell no.

Your brows lift slightly as you glance at your pile of books. "Yeah, I’m still on campus, actually. By the—"

Dean doesn’t even think before he moves. One second, he’s stretched out next to you, and the next, he’s sitting up so fast he nearly trips over his own damn boots.

Your head snaps toward him at his sudden movement. "Uh—" Dean clears his throat, scrambling for an excuse. "Crap, I, uh—I just remembered I gotta… take care of something."

Your brows furrow. "Right now?"

"Yeah, yeah, totally slipped my mind." He’s already standing, grabbing his jacket like it’s a lifeline.

You blink, confused. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah! Yeah, it’s fine," he assures quickly, waving a hand. Too quickly. Too unnatural. "Just—important… business."

You squint at him. "Business?"

"Yup. Very important. Super top-secret. You know how it is." He throws in a crooked grin for good measure, but he can feel the sweat beading at the back of his neck.

Sam’s voice on the phone reminds you of his presence. "Who’s that?"

Dean freezes.

You glance at him, confused, before turning back to the call. "Oh, just—"

"Just a guy," Dean blurts before you can say his name.

Your eyes narrow. "What—"

"Okay, gotta go! Have fun with, uh, studying! Or Sam! Or whatever you end up doing!"

And with that, Dean bolts.

He doesn’t look back, doesn’t pause, just shoves his hands in his pockets and beelines it toward the parking lot like he’s got hellhounds on his heels.

By the time he reaches the Impala, heart still hammering from the ridiculous close call, he watches from a distance as you gather your books, phone still pressed to your ear, completely oblivious to his panic.

And then Sam appears, his familiar tall frame moving toward you with that easy, clueless smile.

Dean slumps against the hood of his car, exhaling hard.

Close. Too close.

He tells himself it won’t happen again. That this was just a one-time thing.

But deep down, he knows better.

ꔛ. navigation 𓂃˖ ࣪ all drabbles ; compatibility readings ; support my work .ᐟ

want be part of the taglist.ᐣ ⋆.˚ ★— @iloveeveryoneyoureamazing ⋆ @deans-daydream ⋆ @taurus0queenie33 ⋆ @ambiguous-avery ⋆ @krabog ⋆ @itsdearapril ⋆ @nymphet-quenn ⋆ @bluemerakis ⋆ @titsout4jackles ⋆ @lyarr24 ⋆ @hauntedrose555 ⋆ @chevroletdean ⋆ @dulcescorderitas ⋆ @blackmarketfruitrollups ⋆ @impala67rollingthroughtown ⋆ @rulesareshadesofgrey ⋆ @nervoussystems ⋆ @daryls-luvrr ⋆ @sunnyteume ⋆ @drakelover78 ⋆ @angelblqde ⋆ @mostlymarvelgirl ⋆ @whisperingdaze ⋆ @funkenniffler ⋆ @bossyblondie ⋆ @lieutenantchaos ⋆ @iluvnewtie ⋆ @dyhsversion ⋆ @lovewolfspirit ⋆ @kayleighwinchester ⋆ @s0urw00lf ⋆ @cursednevermore ⋆ @onelonelybitch ⋆ @americanvenom13 ⋆ @iluvdeanwinchester ⋆ @idk6505 ⋆ @devilslittlehelper ⋆ @cloverleaf20 ⋆ @giggles1026 ⋆ @idontwannabehere7 ⋆ @beakaleak32 ⋆ @ocelotlist51 ⋆ @lelapine ⋆ @pwin098 ⋆ @lacysretribution ⋆ @globetrotter28 ⋆ @i-love-gvf ⋆ @lemonswinchester ⋆ @4k1vrr ⋆ @bejeweledinterludes ( continues in the comments )

[grandmaster-paradox]

I would go so far as to say Obi-Wan was significantly closer to Cody than either Padmé or (especially) Satine?

I’m not saying he didn’t love both women as well. However, Satine always felt like she came out of left field to me - more a teen romance that remained on a pedestal and didn’t mature with age rather than his greatest love interest. And there was definitely love and respect between him and Padmé but from what I’ve seen/read I’m not sure how close they actually were? Between how short a time they actually knew each other (it’s implied in the second movie that they hadn’t seen each other in ten years and then the war happened) and their respective jobs keeping them focused on other things, they didn’t seem to have that much time to actually get to know one another, personally. Plus, Padmé a was always with Anakin when she was with a Jedi.

(Related, I’d assume there were Jedi he was closer to than either of those two (in fact, why wasn’t Ashoka on that list? He never got confirmation that she survived, did he?) so why wasn’t anyone else on that list?).

Compare that to OnI-Wan’s relationship with the clones - Commander Cody in particular but not exclusively. They lived together, they worked together, they fought and bled and died together. They learned to rely on each other and trust each other. Whether you want to look at things with ship goggles on or not, there is a bond there that would be so much stronger than anything Obi-Wan would have with either Padmé or Satine.

In fact, given the hierarchical and parental/guardian nature of his relationships with both Anakin and Qui-Gon, there’s a good argument Cody in particular was the closest Obi-Wan ever had to a long-term work partner who was his equal. Yes, he out ranked Cody as a High General, but he also out ranked very nearly everyone he worked with during the war as well (ever seen one of those scales that showed just how hilariously much Obi-Wan outranked Anakin as General of a Systems Army compared to Anakin’s single battalion?). As Marshall Commander, Cody was at the highest ranking a clone could get - so far as I can tell - and it’s obvious in the show that he has a lot of freedom and authority to work with. And also that Obi-Wan trusts and relies on him to use that authority as needed.

There’s no chance they weren’t extremely close - friends, lovers, brothers, however you want to look at it, it doesn’t really matter. The point is the bond between them, not the nature of that bond.

Clone erasure - Cody erasure - by Star Wars authors is incredibly meta in a weird way that I’m not sure how to articulate but it both depresses me and pisses me off. In-story, most of the Galaxy sees the clones as little more than a single monolith made up of millions of interchangeable parts - no single one of which is of any particular value. We, the audience, get to know individual clones as the singular entities they are - with their unique personalities, relationships, hopes, dreams, and more - so we know better. We love the clones individually. Yet somehow, many official SW authors fall into the same trap as the in-universe characters who dismiss the clones’ importance as people effecting the story rather than objects being effected and ignore their relationships to the main characters* entirely. I’m not sure what that says about these authors - I’m not sure it says anything at all - but given how the SW fandom has long cottoned on to the slave-army implications inherent with the clones very existence, being so quick to dismiss or ignore them to highlight more “important” or “unique” characters is rather disturbing.

I’m not sure where I’m going with this. This whole post is a rambling mess. I’m sorry.

* I asterisk because I see Satine more as an object affecting things than many of the clones. Even in the episode she’s in, she’s a plot device more than a person - though she was somewhat better in the ya novel. Yet somehow Satine gets to be a named character in Obi-Wan’s list of lost loved ones while no clones - better fleshed out characters within the story - are named. It’s baffling.

I've been seeing this quote from the Claudia Gray line from "Master and Apprentice" go around:

Every person Obi-Wan ever truly loved—Anakin, Satine, Padmé, and Qui-Gon himself—came to a terrible end.

And, like, okay, maybe unreliable narrator, but. Tell me you don't know any combat veterans without telling me you don't know any combat veterans.

Because after three years of war, Obi-Wan is going to truly love at least some of his men to the same level as he loves those four.

Christopher Cantwell's Obi-Wan comic gets it. Three of the five issues — which cover more than just the Clone War — show how deeply Obi-Wan cares about the clone troopers he led and served with. And, ahem, how he misses Cody to this day, to be precise.

And, if I'm allowed to get a little "conspiracy Charlie" meme, if "so it goes with my friends, it seems" refers to Anakin also trying to kill him, then Obi-Wan puts his relationship with Cody on the same level as his relationship to Anakin, ergo canonically Obi-Wan also loved Cody in his own way. QED.

[kingkat12]

unclean (Roman Godfrey x reader)

WARNINGS: angst, jealousy-schemes, mentions of sex, weird biblical references lol, ANGST (ouch ouch ouch)

summary: will you ever feel clean again? this has become too much-- how are you supposed to make a decision when the people in your life are pulling you in different directions? all you can do is try not to break.

word count: 6,150 (warming y'all up for the last chapter oop)

PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12, PART 13, PART 14, PART 15

a/n: THANK YOU FOR 1K FOLLOWERS!! enjoy the second-to-last chapter and the calm before the absolute shitstorm;) MWAH, thank you for all your support my lovelies!!<333

"Think you'll ever be clean again?"

Roman's words echoed in my mind over and over; I realized that my answer was no.

I felt dirty.

Dirty, unclean, and filthy, all the fucking time.

The hallway was loud today, but Letha walked beside me like she was floating through a quieter world, untouched by the noise, untouched by all filth. She always had that kind of ease, that effortless grace that made people part around her without her having to ask them to. Was Letha maybe the modern equivalent of Moses? 

... That was an odd thought; certainly not one I wanted to think again.

Then again, it was either weird biblical references or thoughts about Roman. The weirder my thoughts were, the more they interfered with anything Roman-related that could bring forth a hefty blush to my cheeks, or a feeling of doom settling in my chest.

I was unclean.

And I felt like a dirty fucking whore.

I kept my head down, tugging my jacket higher over my shoulder, conscious of the way the collar barely covered the faint smudge of the hickey Roman had left on my neck from our time in the library. I did my best to conceal it this morning, but I was still terrified the blooming colors were shining through-- Letha hadn't noticed it yet, and I wanted to keep it that way. I had even tried to scrub the hickey off in the shower despite knowing it wouldn't work; I was getting desperate. I had cried, brought my hands over the marks over and over, like I was begging them to go away and disappear.

Marked.

Unclean.

Filthy.

Filthy fucking liar.

"So..." Letha started, brushing a strand of golden hair behind her ear as she smiled knowingly. Immediately, I sensed that this wasn't going to be good. "There's this guy... his name is Jack, and he told me to tell you that he's into you."

I blinked. "What?" Who?

"I also told him I'd ask if you were interested," She cast me a sideways glance, beaming at me like she was serving me the best news of the century. "I think you should be."

My stomach twisted. "Letha!--"

"Don't say no yet!" She looped her arm through mine, warm and insistent. "He's sweet. You need someone sweet!"

I didn't want someone sweet-- I wanted the devil reincarnate that haunted my every waking moment, also known as Roman Godfrey. "Jack... Wang?" I tried. "Which Jack are we talking about?"

Letha bit her lip to contain an excited giggle, squeezing my arm; "Jack Edwards!--"

"No!" The words slipped past my mouth before I could stop them. I cleared my throat, hoping to recover from my outburst. "Not him... He's one of Roman's friends. That's really fucked up."

Letha sighed; disappointment read all over her face. "You'd never have to actually like the guy," she pressed. "Just... entertain it for a little while. Give Roman a taste of his own medicine. Don't you think he deserves it, after keeping... that from you?" 

She couldn't say the word out loud in the hallway-- upir.

Because that was the reason we were in this station in the first place, the fact that Roman was a upir.

The idea of making him taste his own medicine made my stomach twist, and not entirely from disgust. I hated the thought of stooping to his level, playing some shallow game... But the image flickered unbidden through my mind; Roman's dark eyes snapping toward me across the room, his smile dropping as I lean just a little too close to some other guy, making him watch me the way I had been forced to watch him too.

I squeezed my eyes shut, shaking away the thought. "It's childish,"

"He's been childish since the day you broke up! Why should you have to be the bigger person?"

If Letha knew the real truth of what Roman had actually done after we broke up, she'd have a heart attack. There was no way in hell I'd tell her about what happened in the library some days ago. My heart thudded unevenly in my chest; maybe I was being the bigger person because I wanted to be? Because I still loved him, even though I hated him for everything he had done to me, even though he had been a upir all along. Despite my attempts at staying calm and neutral, Roman's voice echoed in my head, images of him curling his fingers inside me with that evil smirk on his face flashing before my eyes; "Think you'll ever be clean of me again?"

Never.

Never.

Letha watched me disassociate and shudder, and her eyes gleamed like she already knew she had me hooked. "This will help you get over him, y'know? I only want what's best for you,"

I exhaled slowly through my nose, fingers curling into fists. It was a terrible idea-- reckless, messy, everything I wasn't supposed to want. But God, how I wanted him to hurt too, for all the lies, all the girls, and for the pathetic mess he had made of me in the library.

Maybe this would scrub me clean of the mess we'd made?

My silence was enough of an answer for Letha. Her smile turned smug as she leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms. "There ya go,"

I shot her a glare, but she only giggled under her breath; "It's perfect," she purred, voice teasing. "It'll drive him crazy!--"

"Shouldn't you maybe be a little more worried about your own life?" I snapped. "Why are you so obsessed with mine?"

It took me a second to realize what I had just said. My eyes widened at the same time as Letha's, and her hook around my arm lessened. Oddly enough, there was something satisfactory about seeing her like this-- I had no idea what came over me when I continued; "Instead of setting me up with more guys, why can't we talk about who you're fucking?"

"No one!" Letha huffed, retracting her arm. "What's come over you?!"

The more I watched her bewildered and offended expression, the more I wanted to dig my thumbs into her eyes and split her skull open; that way, I could maybe finally get to see what she was plotting in there. "Don't you have anyone running around you? You always do,"

"Not--" Letha cleared her throat, attempting to save face. "Not recently, no."

"Are you sure?"

"I-- Seriously, I don't get you!" Letha stopped walking in the middle of the hallway, staring back at me in disbelief. "I'm trying to be nice and keep you distracted, and this is how you repay me?"

I placed myself in front of her, folding my arms over my chest. "Why are you getting so defensive?" It felt like I had found an odd rope in the forest, and I was pulling at it with all my might-- I had struck gold, hadn't I? 

Letha's lips parted, wanting to argue, but nothing came out. A shadow flickered over her face-- too quick, too subtle, but I caught it. There was something there. For a moment, I thought she might actually tell me. But then, just as quickly, she smoothed out her features, letting out a soft, breathy laugh like I'd said something ridiculous; "You're impossible," she muttered, shaking her head.

I cocked a brow. "I'm... impossible?"

"You're just lashing out because you don't want to admit I'm right," she teased, looping her arm back through mine like I hadn't just cornered her. "But I get it. It's scary, right? The idea of actually moving on?"

My pulse stuttered. I opened my mouth to push again, because I knew I was right, I could feel it-- but Letha was already moving, already steering the conversation back onto safer ground.

She gave me time to let her words sink in, studying my face with that keen, knowing gaze, like she was waiting for me to break.

"Letha--"

"I just want you to be happy," Letha murmured, reaching forward to put her hand on my shoulder with an earnest touch. "And I know you won't be if you keep waiting for Roman to change."

If only she knew I wasn't waiting for him to change-- I was waiting for the end of the week, when I hoped my answer would come stumbling into my mind with no effort at all. However, it was such a clean, practiced shift in her tone, that for a second, I doubted myself; had I really imagined that flicker of something in her eyes? Was I reading too much into this?

Letha wasn't the enemy here.

She was my friend.

... Right?

"I have to go," she eventually said, giving me a final squeeze before slipping away. "But think about it, okay? Being seen with a friend of Roman would fry his crazy nympho brain." Letha didn't wait for a response-- Letha Godfrey never waited for anyone. She was already blending back into the flow of students, graceful as ever, like she hadn't just left a rock lodged in my throat.

I let out a sharp exhale before I turned back to find my locker, shaken up by the conversation. This was nuts-- was I supposed to let one of Roman's friends flirt with me? Why was he even interested in me? Roman didn't have that many friends in the first place anyway, so I��knew this was risky.

With shaky fingers, I worked the combination of my locker, still rattled from the conversation--

Until my body froze.

There was torn page splayed on top of my unorganized heap of books. Someone had snuck it in between the cracks of my locker.

I pulled it out slowly, staring down at the words, ink sinking into the delicate paper; it was a passage from The Picture of Dorian Gray.

You have killed my love. You used to stir my imagination. Now you don't even stir my curiosity. You simply produce no effect. I loved you because you were marvellous, because you had genius and intellect, because you realized the dreams of great poets and gave great substance to the shadows of art. You have thrown it all away. You are shallow and stupid.

What... 

... The actual fuck?

I held back a gasp of shock and disgust, fighting the urge to crumple up the page and throw it to the floor to stomp it. It was clear as day that Roman had left me this-- who else would assume this was a good thing to leave the girl you're begging to take you back? 

Was he trying to prove a point?

Was he trying to tell me that I was shallow and stupid for thinking about throwing everything between us away?

With an angry huff, I stuffed the page into my back pocket-- I was definitely going to burn it when I got home.

... Maybe then, I'd feel clean?

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

I had been angry before, yes; but nothing could beat the tsunami of rage ravaging through me after seeing that stupid passage.

I sat on the bleachers during lunch the next day, tucked into one of the higher rows, the sun casting sharp shadows along the field below-- I angrily picked at the edge of my water bottle label, trying to drown out the chatter of the students scattered around the stands. Letha sat beside me, legs crossed, her chin delicately propped on one hand; "Don't look now," she murmured, voice soft and secretive. "But... I think your admirer is on his way."

My head snapped up to look at her before I could stop myself. "There's no fucking way," I hissed under my breath. "He's here? Now?"

Letha's grin flickered, bright with amusement. My stomach turned as I followed her gaze-- and sure enough, there he was. Jack Edwards, one of the jocks from Roman's cocky friend group. He strolled across the field with some guys I recognized from before, hands stuffed into his pockets, cutting through the groups of lingering students like he owned the place.

My pulse quickened. Panic rose in my chest as I glared at Letha; "You didn't,"

"I might've... suggested you needed some cheering up today," Her eyes sparkled, wicked and bright. "He was more than happy to oblige!"

"Cheering up?! Letha, I didn't agree to this!" With a groan, I buried my face in my hands, hoping the ground would open and swallow me whole. I didn't want anyone but Roman anyway-- fucking hell, I should've been more clear with Letha.

On the other hand, she looked proud as ever; "I'm the best, aren't I?"

Heat flooded my face. I gripped the edge of the bleacher so tightly my knuckles ached. "Letha, I'm two seconds away from lobotomizing myself with my fucking water bottle because of you!"

"Oh, come on," she whispered, leaning in close. "It's just a little harmless fun! You need some distractions, we talked about this!"

But there was nothing harmless about the way Jack's eyes locked onto mine as he climbed the steps.

Unclean.

Filthy.

I felt dirty-- I shouldn't be indulging in this.

Trapped, pinned beneath Letha's gaze, I tried to contain my panic; "Why the fuck is he even into me? He's, like, very close to Roman, no?"

"Well..." Letha cleared her throat, shooting Jack a sweet smile as she waved him over to us. This would've been the perfect time to catapult myself out of my seat and up into the sun's orbit. "Men are primitive, y'know? If they think they can get laid, they don't really care how or with whom."

"Ew, Letha!" I was sick to my stomach just imagining that I'd sleep with anyone that wasn't Roman. 

"Relax," she cooed, brushing her fingers lightly against my arm. "It's only a game! You don't have to do anything but lead him on a bit."

I couldn't breathe.

And then Jack approached-- standing just below our row, flashing a grin that made my stomach flip. "Hey, girls," he murmured. "Need some company?"

I wished the ground would swallow me whole. Before I could even muster up a half-hearted response, Letha was already smoothing down her skirt and rising to her feet. "You bet! I'll leave you two to it," she said sweetly, flashing me a look that was both knowing and victorious before slipping down the steps like she had just orchestrated the most harmless, innocent thing in the world.

But it wasn't harmless, not when my stomach was twisting itself into knots, and definitely not innocent.

And then, like a twist of fate, I felt a shiver run up my spine— I knew that feeling like I knew my own breath. There was a tingling sensation at the front of my brain, sending repeated signals to turn my head.

... Oh no.

I knew who could be doing this to me.

With a pit in my stomach, I turned my head slightly, pulse pounding in my ears, and sure enough, there he was.

Roman appeared at the far end of the field with the rest of his friends, just beyond the fences, half in the shadows of the trees. The upper button of his shirt was unbuttoned, his hands shoved deep in his pockets, but his posture was rigid, unreadable.

Except I could read him.

The tight set of his jaw, the slight flare of his nostrils, the way his head tipped, just barely, like he was daring me to keep looking at him. 

I opened my mouth (whether to call out to Roman or to breathe, I wasn't sure), but before I could do either, Jack's voice pulled me back; "So," he drawled, taking the empty space beside me. "What's a pretty thing like you doing all the way up here, huh?"

I barely heard him. My eyes flickered back to Roman instinctively, but--

He was already gone.

A cold wave of panic crashed over me. I sat up straighter, scanning the field, searching, aching--but there was nothing. No sign of him, like he had never been there at all.

Except he had been, and he had seen everything. He had seen Jack sitting down next to me, he had seen the hungry look in his eyes; I had an inkling that this was going to bite me in the ass. I had screwed over my one-week truce with Roman, all because of Letha's convincing. Swallowing the thick rock in my throat, my mind raced with everything unsaid, everything unfixable. What had I done?

I turned to Jack, not bothering to sweeten my tone; "Let's cut the bullshit, yeah? What are you doing here?"

Blinking, he let out a shocked laugh. He fixed his hair in an oddly familiar manner (it wouldn't surprise me if he had picked it up from Roman) before he recovered. "I've been... trying to get your number for a while. Before Roman got to you, actually,"

... What? 

I felt my face soften. "Oh," 

Jack chuckled, shaking his head as he darted his gaze to the field in front of us. "Godfrey called dibs out of nowhere," he explained. "And if we are to follow bro-code, I had to pull away."

"This isn't very bro-code friendly, though?" It was true-- I had seen Jack hanging out with Roman recently, so they couldn't have had a falling out. "Roman could rip your throat out for this." 

He could. He genuinely could. 

I held back a shudder as I watched Jack, and the way the sun reflected off his pitch black hair. Eventually, he spoke; "Roman's been preoccupied with other girls as of late, so I figured I'd shoot my shot," He was smiling at me now, so smug, so sure of himself-- it was almost charming. "I mean, I had to see if the rumours were true."

I blinked at him, barely processing. "What rumors?"

Jack only grinned wider; "That you're finally over Godfrey,"

My stomach dropped.

Over him? Over Roman?

The laugh that almost escaped my throat was so bitter I had to bite down on my lip to keep it in. I had spent every second of every day thinking about him, hurting over him, wanting him. There was no version of my life where I just moved on.

I should have shut Jack down immediately. I should have told him to go find some other girl to bother, that I wasn't interested, that Letha had put him up to this for her own amusement-- but instead, I just stared at him, hollowed out, my hands tightening around the hem of my skirt as my mind spiralled.

Had Roman lied to me? Was he actually preoccupied with other girls? Was he maybe so desperate to keep me around because I'd be an easy lay? Maybe he was scared I'd tell his secret to people if he didn't keep me close?

I felt my breath constrict in my chest; "He's sleeping with the cheerleaders, isn't he?"

Jack blinked. "Roman?"

"Is he?" Please, please, no. If he had lied to me about this, I would die on the spot.

Something in Jack's charming eyes changed, but I didn't need Sherlock Holmes to decode that look for me-- they softened with the realization that I would probably never be over Roman. I would always be Roman's girl, just like every other girl at this school that had ever been involved with him. Therefore, I watched as Jack sighed, shaking his head; "Nope. I would've heard the details by now, if so,"

I instantly felt my heart fall into its right place. "Thank you," I whispered.

Jack sank back into his seat, looking back at the field in front of us while he nodded to himself. I peeked the small smile; was he maybe relieved to get a proper answer? "Sorry to bother you, then," There was a certain ease about him that made me feel beyond comfortable-- he wasn't snappy about this becoming a failed attempt (unlike how a certain other blonde asshole would react), but he was simply accepting of the facts before him. In another universe, I would've probably gone for someone like Jack, someone confident, someone quietly strong.

I had no idea what came over me when I suddenly found myself smiling too; "You didn't bother me. It's kinda nice to talk to someone that isn't Letha,"

Jack glanced at me with a flirty chuckle. "She's a bit intense, right?"

"A bit, yeah," 

"I think she gets it from that Rumancek dude," Jack continued, shrugging matter-of-factly. "They're always hanging out, the both of them. Did you know that the guy once threatened to gut me for being a bad group partner during a lab project? Funny man... I don't get what she sees in him, but I guess the weirdos gotta find love somewhere too, right?"

... Wait.

What?

I straightened up in my seat. "Peter?"

Jack's eyes widened with intrigue-- "Why do I sense this is news to you?"

"They're not together like that," I huffed. "That'd be nuts. If Peter and Letha were sleeping together, Roman would have a field day chewing them out to the bone."

"Okay..." With a cocky laugh, Jack shrugged again; "I might've misinterpreted it, then. They hang out a lot behind school, that's all I've seen... looking all gooey and shit."

I had to put a stop to this rumor before it got to Roman. Knowing him, he'd jump to conclusions, and Letha could really, really suffer; "No, no... Even if they talk, then it's nothing like that,"

"Alright," Jack snorted. "Don't come running to me when you see that I'm right, though."

The sun, now dipping lower, cast long shadows across the field. It felt like the calm before a storm, and my ease began to settle into a rhythm. I was about to say something, maybe even something nice, but then, I heard it; the unmistakable sound of heavy footsteps approaching. The air instantly grew colder, and I turned my head, dread pooling in my chest. My eyes locked on him-- Roman.

His presence was like a sudden freeze, like he was the shift in the atmosphere. He moved with a quiet intensity that made the world seem to shrink around him; I wanted to shrink into nothing as well, sucked into a black hole where I could hide. 

Before I could process it, Jack spoke again, his tone lowered, almost conspiratorial. "I don't know what it is about you two," he muttered under his breath, just loud enough for me to hear. "But you both always act like you're untouchable... and with him hanging around, I suppose you'll always be."

When Roman eventually reached us, he was completely still, frozen in a way I had never seen before. His jaw clenched, his eyes narrowing ever so slightly as they passed over me, barely acknowledging my presence. I felt my pulse quicken, my breath catching in my throat. There was something about his stoic expression that made my stomach flip, and it made me feel like I was about to be disciplined for acting out, just like the old days in elementary school. 

It was as if Roman couldn't quite let go of the distance between us, eyes flickering back and forth for a good second or two. Then, his gaze darted to Jack with unnatural speed-- upir, upir, upir. "Seriously?" Roman said, snapping his fingers at him as his condescending tone fuelled my anxiety. "You've really got nothing better to do than this?"

Jack froze for a split second, and I could almost hear the gears turning in his head, trying to process the shift in Roman's tone. His voice hadn't risen; it was the kind of tone that made it clear he wasn't in the mood for games, but it wasn't outright threatening-- just... annoyed.

However, to my surprise, Jack shot a grin. "Well, well, if it isn't the big bad Godfrey! Finally decided to join us, huh?"

Roman didn't seem amused at all by his antics-- quite the contrary. "She's not your problem, dude,"

Jack shrugged, undeterred, but his words were sharper than before; "She's not your property either, Roman,"

I held my breath. I really, really didn't want to be here. Little by little, I started sliding down my seat. Maybe if I hit the ground, I could slither away?

But the confrontation wasn't over-- Jack's grin became little more pointed with every second. "You sure you're not just holding onto her out of habit, man? You seemed pretty done before, when you were talking to Jessica,"

That name made me want to barf right down on Roman's shoes, and for my vomit to burn through the leather of his shoes. Jessica, the same girl that had tried to flirt with him at a party a while ago-- Jessica, the same girl he had threatened with his lighter, saying he'd burn her extensions off if she didn't shut up about me. Was he really that mad at me? Was he so mad that he was actually talking to a girl he despised just to get revenge for the heartbreak I had caused him?

Roman's jaw tightened, but he didn't immediately respond-- I knew this was the Godfrey look of mortification. It was clear that he didn't want me to know that he had talked to Jessica at all.

To make matters worse, Jack sensed this and kept pushing. He pointed between Roman and I, biting down on the look of glee spreading through his face. "I mean... you two aren't even together anymore, right? So why do you care if I'm talking to her?"

I could see that he was getting to Roman. A part of me wanted to grab Jack, shake him, and warn him that he was going up against the most dangerous carnivore on the planet, a upir, yet... another part of me wanted to see if Roman would actually snap. After his illustrative show of his control in the library last week, I wondered how this would apply in real life the second time around. 

Roman's chest tightened for a split second, and for just a moment, I was sure he'd flip, I was sure he'd just lunge at Jack to get it over with.

But alas--

"We might not be together anymore, but we still fuck,"

... No.

Oh God, no.

There was a beat of silence. 

My heart sunk in my chest, and I felt the blood drain from my face. It wasn't just the words-- it was the coldness in his voice, like he was speaking in a way that made it clear that pursuing me wasn't something Jack should even be thinking about.

On the other hand, Jack's grin faltered as his gaze flickered between Roman and I. I wondered whether he imagined when we had managed to have sex, where we had done it, what the timeline was-- that must've been a mortifying thought to think. I was certainly not jealous of him. Still, he opened his mouth to say something, anything, to salvage his pride.

But Roman cut him to it; "Maybe you should ask your little friend here what depths of desperation one must sink down into to get fucked on a library floor?"

I felt like the air had been sucked out of me, and it got to a point where I started pondering whether to get up and push my stupidly pretty ex-boyfriend down the bleachers. Then, my next thought was that it probably wouldn't hurt him at all. I hadn't expected to, but I missed thinking about other things, like whether Letha actually was the modern-day Moses or not. And Jack...  poor Jack's face went pale. 

Roman's eyes never left him, and I spotted the evil shimmer in his eyes, the look of complete and utter evil glee. Beyond happy with himself, he let out a huff of pride before he stuffed his hands into his pockets-- "Get lost, dude," he said, his tone final, deadly. "This one's mine."

Jack didn't say another word. He was quick to get up, muttering something under his breath that was unmistakable; "Freaks," 

I sat frozen to my seat, my heart still racing, trying to process what had just happened as I watched him leave, huffing as he disappeared down the bleachers. It felt like someone had just poured a bucket of cold water on me, and now I was left to shiver and shudder.

Eventually, Roman turned to me with that same evil smirk I secretly loved; "You should stop talking to guys like that," he cooed, his tone soft with false concern. "You know they can't keep up, baby. Shoot a little higher, if you want to get over me so bad."

If I could kick the bleacher seat away from me when I shot up, I would. Stepping closer, I buried my pointer in Roman's chest; "Fuck off," I hissed. "You don't get to do this!--"

"No, I do," In an instant, his smirk was wiped off his face, and it revealed the bitter glimmer in his eyes as he grabbed my hand, urging me to get my fingers off of him. "We decided on a week's worth of peace, did you forget?"

Angered, I yanked my arm away from Roman with a groan. "You decided that! You cornered me with your fucking fingers inside me! How the fuck do you expect me to think clearly in that state?! On top of that, now you've managed to tell Jack we fucked, so congratulations! Letha will probably find out in an hour or two, and you've screwed me over again!"

Getting all of that in his face didn't seem easy-- Roman broke eye contact, letting his gaze fall down to his newly polished shoes. "Jack won't say anything," he mumbled. "And if anything, you simply deny it. I won't tell Letha anything if she asks me."

It took me a minute to really feel the weight of what he was saying. At the start of my whole journey with Roman, he was dying to tell Letha everything, and he would do anything for an opportunity to rat me out and get me in trouble-- but now, he was protecting me. From now on, I was sure he'd always want to do that. This snapped me out of my anger, and I retorted to a simple nod; "You owe me, by the way,"

Roman's eyes peeked up, his eyebrows raising-- "That's my line,"

I struggled to bite down on the smile that immediately threatened to crack across my lips. This was highly ironic. "Stop it," I whispered, carefully nudging him. "You owe me forty-nine ninety-nine."

Roman's cheeks seemed to warm from my touch. "What for?"

"The, uh..." I swallowed hard. "The plan B." 

It took him a few seconds to figure out what I had needed that for. Had he forgotten that he had come inside of me? Seemingly not; "Oh," Roman's hand shot to his pocket again, finding his wallet. "You took care of it?"

That line annoyed me to the point where the following words simply slipped past my mind-- "Of course I did! You're crazy if you think I'd have babies with you,"

Roman's hands froze as he reached for the dollar bills in his wallet. It wasn't for many seconds, and I would've missed it had I not been watching his every move. I felt like I had punched myself in the gut, and now I wondered whether he felt that way about it too. In silence, he gave me fifty dollars, not looking me in the eyes anymore. 

"Don't look so sad," I breathed, feeling my heart clench. "Roman, I--"

"I would've been happy," His jaw tightened, and he shoved the bills into my hand with more force than necessary, like he couldn't stand to have them in his grasp a second longer. "If it were with you... I would've been happy."

Roman didn't wait for a reply-- he didn't dare to. Turning on his heel, he stormed off down the bleachers, the sound of his boots echoing in the empty space. 

The fifty dollars burned in my hand. It felt like they were about to turn my flesh into burning lava, making a hole in my palms. I let Roman walk away, I let him leave; what else was I to do when I was this shell-shocked? 

I crumpled the dollars into my pocket, sniffling. 

When had the most beautiful relationship in my life managed to become... this?

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

There comes a point when you have nothing more to say. There comes a point when it doesn't feel worth it anymore, when the pain becomes too much to bear, and your body materializes it-- most days, I could feel the sorrow like a ball in my hands, vibrating, ablaze in a cloud of fire, burning my fingers before slipping through them.

Being without Roman felt like waking up in a dead man's bedroom. Empty. It used to be a place filled with life, with love, yet now it was abandoned, destitute. I used to be a person filled with life, with love, yet now I was alone, rotting. 

I had done it all to myself. This was my own doing, and I had done it while wielding the sharpest of swords, forged just to fight the scariest of beings--

But Roman wasn't scary?

He wasn't even a full upir, something Letha had failed to mention.

If I closed my eyes, I could still see him kneeling before me, clutching onto my body as he sobbed into the fabric of my shirt. Pleading, crying, begging, begging, begging. The broken look in his eyes, the way his fingers trembled against me, holding me like he was breathing his last dying breath and wasting it on me. 

In my mind, when I visited the memory, I'd sink down to the floor with him. I'd bury my fingers in his hair and let him cry into the crook of my shoulder. I'd caress him, hold him, tell him everything was going to be alright, and that I loved him like I had loved no one else. 

Roman Godfrey used to be scary. Now, he was just a boy.

Wailing for comfort.

Begging for forgiveness.

Pleading for another chance to get back the life he had once led, the one I had so cruelly ripped from his trembling arms.

I couldn't breathe. Maybe it was the fact that I didn't want to? Maybe if I stopped breathing for long enough, I'd no longer have to feel the pain of being conscious? I could die of my own volition, on my terms, in my own time.

Yet then I'd...

I'd leave him.

Roman would be alone.

He'd continue walking this earth with no one by his side. He'd wander through centuries alone, he'd eat alone, he'd cry alone, he'd live alone, he'd be alone.

So I whispered; "I don't want you to be alone,"

I adjusted my phone where it lay on my pillow, making sure he'd be able to hear me when he got this voice message. "I don't want you to be alone... All those years, when everyone you know is dead. That was the most heartbreaking thing about all of this, Roman, that I found out that you're destined to live forever if... if you kill yourself..."

My lower lip quivered as I shifted in my bed, rubbing my tears into my skin. I shouldn't have bothered-- I had already drenched the pillow.

"So, whatever I end up choosing, Roman, you need to live," 

Please.

Please.

"You need to go on, and you need to stay strong... and make your heart steel if you must. Do whatever you need to do, just-- just don't do what would need to be done for you to... to be a full upir. Don't ever think about it. Don't even consider it. Could you promise me that?"

I blinked away my tears, rubbing my forehead in a circle with my pointer to hopefully alleviate the pain. 

Nothing ever did.

Nothing ever would.

"You said I'd never be clean of you," I whispered. "But you're not something I need to wash off my skin, Roman." 

Sniffling, I shifted-- I wondered whether he'd be able to hear the shuffling of my bedsheets. "I just want you to be happy. I really, really want you to be happy. So, if we don't end up together... think of me once in a while?"

I hoped he would.

I so desperately hoped he would. "... Please?" And with that, I broke. Letting into a loud hiccup of a sob, I hung up on Roman's voicemail. In the bleak dark of the night, I caught the time; 02:04.

And at 02:27, I got a twenty-three minute long voice message back.

I pressed play over and over;

"I love you,"

A whisper. Barely there.

"I love you, I love you, I love you,"

Again and again, soft, rhythmic, almost like a prayer. Like if he just said it enough times, it would make things right. It was the only thing he could say.

My thumb hovered over his name, over that tiny glowing green button. Roman was awake. I knew he was. Somewhere out there, he was awake with his phone still in his hands, maybe just waiting... maybe just hoping?

I choked my sobs against my pillows, my whole body trembling beneath the weight of the crushing heartbreak-- it didn't matter. None of it mattered, because I couldn't call him.

So I played it again.

And again.

And then I saved it twice; once on my phone, and once on my USB the next morning, just in case I ever forgot how it felt to be loved like that.

"I love you... I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you,"

Roman loved me...

But would that be enough to save us?

At least I had until Friday to figure it out-- at Jasmine's party.

(a/n: AHHH I can't WAIT for y'all to see what's gonna go down at the party!! this was like a teeny tiny little appetizer... omfg. thank you so so much for reading this far!! 🥹💕)

here are all the chapters!!<3: PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12, PART 13, PART 14, PART 15

loveliest taglist of all time:

@mentallyscreamingsincebirth @putherup @corawithfanfiction @vladsgirlxx

@iamaslytherin0 @sexualparkour @the-universe-is-complicated @heavenly-bratt

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[anniflamma]

Okay… I’m going to rant about a book that I read a while ago.... And I can’t deny it anymore… it was a bad book.

The Passion of Sergius and Bacchus by David Reddish. It’s a romantic retelling of the Christian saints Sergius and Bacchus.

To tell the story briefly about these saints, Sergius and Bacchus were third-century Roman soldiers and Christian martyrs. The oldest record of their martyrdom describes them as erastai (Greek for “lovers”). Scholars believe they may have been united in the rite of adelphopoiesis, a kind of early Christian same-sex union. When their Christian faith became known, after they refused to attend sacrifices to Zeus, Sergius and Bacchus were arrested and paraded through the streets in women’s clothing in an unsuccessful effort to humiliate them. The reason it failed was that the duo didn’t feel humiliated being dressed as women. After that they were both executed. Bacchus was beaten to death and Sergius was forced to walk in inward-iron-spiked metal shoes to another town and there was executed.

So, of course, when I found out there was a book retelling about them, I bought it immediately and obviously ignored the negative reviews. I read it with rose-tinted glasses on and loved it! Sure, I could see some red flags, but I ignored them, and to be honest, there are some parts of the book that is very good.

But here’s the problem with it: Reddish’s way of portraying women is… very questionable. For example, there are only two named female characters in the book. Only two. The first one is Helen, whose personality traits are that she’s pregnant and stupid. Im not kidding. Not that she actually does anything dumb, the narrative just tells us she’s stupid. She don't do anything, like she takes parts in some conversations with the other male characters but other than that, nothing. But the book itself and the maincharacters acts like she is the most dumb person there is. Later in the book, she dies, motivating another male character to make irrational decisions out of grief. Her only purpose is to serve as a plot device when she dies.....

The second named female character is Miriam (I remember right...), and she’s a homophobe. She does have a small arc where she recognizes she’s wrong, the next chapter she’s back to being homophobic again, and the narrative nor other characters doesn’t acknowledge her regression.

Trigger warning for the topic of rape.

Then there’s another female character who appears in the book. She doesn’t have a name. She’s basically just a narrative device to show that Sergius is a good person. There’s a scene where Sergius finds a group of Roman men raping a 14-year-old girl. He kills them and saves her. He doesn’t speak to her, she have no speaking lines, and then… Sergius just leaves and continues with whatever he was doing before. The plot moves on, and it’s never mentioned again....This entire scene happens in less than one page. At first, I thought it would come back to bite Sergius, you know, because he just killed four Roman men.... but nope! It was just there to show that Sergius thinks rape is bad and that he’s a skilled fighter who can take down four men at once. That’s all. Wtf?

This is why I hate stories that use rape as a tool to make a male character look good...

And then there’s the moment when Sergius and Bacchus were forced to be dressed in women’s clothing… In this retelling book, it’s portrayed as deeply shameful. Sergius has a long inner monologue about how awful he feels seeing Bacchus in women’s clothing, blah blah blah.

Like… this book shits on every single female character it has, and when it reaches the part where, in the original story, the men proudly embrace being “Brides of Christ,” it does the exact opposite. Yet Sergius is described as empathetic toward women’s suffering, that guy have inner monologues about how much he thinks that women should be treated better but at the same time he’d rather be physically tortured than wear women’s clothing.... And Sergius nor the narrative never questions why Sergius feel that way.... Talk about the irony... a modern retelling of an ancient story about two men who proudly embrace becoming "Brides of Christ" which leads to their death, yet in this version, it’s portrayed as something shameful.

How do you, as an author, take an old story from the freaking third century and potray it like this? There is no women in the legend so all these female characters are made up by the author... I can't help it but it feels like this author just simply don't like women... I really wanted to like this book... but once you see it without the redtinded glasses... it's really hard for me to recommend it... Stay away guys.

[fullsunstrawberry]

Waittt you gotta continue with what happened after haechan dressed up as the pirate 🫣

Haechan Doppelgänger (part 2)

(Click here for part one)

word count: 1.9k

cw: Pure Smut! No plot (unless you read the first part), teasing, cursing, shitty pirate talk, cunnilingus, no condom mentioned, cumming inside, and more

authors note: Loooong overdue but you ask, I deliver MWAH 💋 here you go ;)

[nct dream masterlist]

Haechan stared at the text, heart pounding.

When the doorbell rang an hour later, Haechan was pacing in his living room. The costume had arrived thanks to express delivery, and he was now dressed as a pirate, feeling equal parts ridiculous and smug. The ruffled shirt hung open at the chest, the black pants clung to his legs, and the boots added a couple of inches to his height. He even put on a faux leather belt with a plastic sword tucked in for good measure.

When he opened the door, You stood on the other side, wearing a big T-shirt and pajama pants, expression shifting from skepticism to sheer amusement. “Oh my god,” you said, laughter bubbling up uncontrollably. “You actually did it.”

Haechan leaned against the doorframe, trying his best to look cool. “You said you’d sleep with me if I dressed like this,” he said, his voice low and teasing. “So, here I am.”

You stepped inside, closing the door behind you. Crossing your arms, your gaze sweeping over him. “You look ridiculous,” you said, though the slight redness climbing your neck gave you away.

“Ridiculous enough to follow through on your promise?” he shot back, raising an eyebrow.

You hesitated, confidence slipping as you realized you might have underestimated the effect of your teasing. There was something about the way Haechan looked in that costume—like he’d stepped out of a cheesy porno.

Haechan watched you closely, the corners of his mouth tugging into a grin as you hesitated. You were flustered—a rare sight for someone so quick with your comebacks.

“Cat got your tongue?” he teased, adjusting the plastic sword at his hip for dramatic effect.

You narrowed your eyes at him, the competitive side kicking in. “You think you have the control, pirate boy?” You shot back, stepping closer. “Let’s see if you’re as bold as you’re acting.”

The shift in the air was noticeable. Haechan’s grin faltered for a split second as you invaded his space, your chin tilted up. His pulse quickened, and though his teasing had been in good fun, he suddenly wondered if he’d bitten off more than he could chew.

“I didn’t buy this costume for nothing,” he replied, his voice softer but no less confident.

“Oh, I can tell,” you said, gaze flicking to the open collar of his shirt. Your teasing grin returned. “You even left the shirt undone. Nice touch. Adds to the…realism.”

Haechan chuckled, his confidence returning. “Well, is it working? Are you getting all worked up?”

You rolled her eyes, but the smile played on your lips. “Fine,” you said, crossing your arms again. “Prove you’re not just a guy in a costume. Give me your best pirate impression, and maybe I’ll follow through with it.”

Haechan’s brows shot up. “You’re joking.”

“Do I look like I’m joking?” You challenged, cocking your head.

For a moment, he hesitated. Then he stepped back, pulling out the plastic sword with a dramatic flourish.

“Aye, lass,” he roared, adopting the worst pirate accent you’d ever heard. “Ahoy there, love. Ye stand before the most daring swashbuckler to ever conquer the seven seas—and hearts. Careful now, or I might just plunder more than yer treasure tonight!.”

You doubled over in laughter, clutching your stomach. “Oh my god, Haechan, stop! That’s terrible!”

He pointed the sword at you, his grin widening. “Terrible enough to make ye surrender?”

“Surrender?” You managed between giggles. “Never!”

“Then prepare to be boarded!” he declared, dropping the sword and lunging for you. You squealed, trying to dart away, but Haechan was quicker. He grabbed you by the waist, spinning you around until they both collapsed onto the couch in a heap of laughter.

“Okay, okay, I surrender!” You said breathlessly, still laughing.

Haechan hovered over you, his hands resting on either side of you. The laughter faded, replaced by a silence that buzzed with unspoken tension. His eyes searched yours, the teasing glint replaced by something softer, more earnest.

“Still think I look ridiculous?” he asked quietly.

Your smile softened, hand brushing against the ruffled fabric of his shirt. “Maybe a little,” you admitted, voice barely above a whisper.

Haechan smirked, leaning down just enough to close the gap between them. “Good thing I don’t care what you think,” he murmured.

Before you could respond, his lips met yours in a kiss that was equal parts playful and demanding. You froze for half a second before melting into it, your fingers curling into the fabric of his costume.

When they finally broke apart, you both were breathless, faces inches apart.

“Guess the costume wasn’t such a bad investment,” Haechan said, his voice laced with victory.

You laughed, shaking her head. “Shut up, pirate boy.”

And for once, Haechan happily obeyed.

Laughter still hung in the air as Haechan's gaze searched yours, a silent question passing between you. Without a word, he leaned in again, capturing your lips in another kiss that was filled with a newfound hunger and desire. The playful banter was forgotten as the heat between you intensified.

With unspoken agreement, you both rose from the couch, lips never breaking contact as you made your way to the bedroom.

Haechan's hands were gentle yet firm as he pressed you against the bed, his eyes never leaving yours as he slowly lifted up your shirt. He let out a low groan as he saw you weren’t wearing a bra.

Your hands reached to finish umbutting his shirt.

“got to get this awful costume off you.”

Haechan chuckled, helping you tug the ruffled shirt off of him before pulling you into another kiss.

“Thought you liked this pirate costume?” He teased, between kisses.

You playfully swatted at his chest, a mischievous glint in your eyes. "I like what's underneath it better," you replied, hands tracing the muscles beneath his skin.

Haechan's breath hitched at your touch, his eyes darkening. Without breaking eye contact, he reached for the strings of your pants, slowly pulling undone and down your legs. You kicked them off, never once looking away from him.

Your hands grabbed at his belt in a hurry, fumbling with the buckle in your eagerness. Haechan's grin widened at your impatience, his breath was hot against your skin as he helped you undress him.

After most of your clothes were thrown on the ground, Haechan took a moment to look at you.

“Fuck…” He groaned “You look so fucking good.”

You felt a rush of heat to your cheeks as you met Haechan's gaze, knowing that he was referring to more than just your appearance. Your heart raced as his hands traced the curves of your body, his eyes never leaving yours.

"You have no idea how much I need you right now," Haechan whispered, his voice rough.

“Than hurry up and fuck me already!” You demanded, your voice shaking slightly. Haechan's eyes widened at your boldness, but he didn't hesitate. His hands gripped your hips as he moved to plant his face near where you needed him the most. Planting soft kisses on the inside of your thigh.

“Haechan…Stop teasing me.” You moaned out, your hands gripping his hair. “I need you right now!”

Haechan grinned against your skin, “Be patient baby, I’m going to make you feel good first.” He whispered, right into your ear.

You couldn't help but moan at the sensation, your hips bucking against his touch.

Haechan's hands grabbed at your thighs, pushing them apart. He leaned in, his breath hot against your skin as he traced soft kisses up and down your thigh. Your heart raced as you felt the anticipation build.

Haechan's fingers gently touched at your entrance, teasing you. Your moans grew louder as he continued, his fingers deftly preparing you for what was to come. Your hips bucked against his touch, desperate for more.

Finally, Haechan slid them inside of you. You cried out in pleasure, your hands gripping the sheets as he began to move inside of you, adding another finger. Each thrust sent waves of goosebumps down your, your moans growing louder with each passing second.

Adjusting your thigh for a better angle, Haechan trailed his lips over your most sensitive spots, teasing with soft nips and lingering kisses.

Haechan’s fingers moved in and out of you as his lips roamed, each touch sending shivers through you. You cried out, gripping the sheets while he kept teasing and pleasing you.

"Haechan… I can't take much more…" You whimpered, the pleasure building deep inside you.

"That's okay sweetheart," Haechan murmured against your skin, his voice deep and husky with desire. "I want you to enjoy this."

Haechan began to move faster, his fingers thrusting in and out of you harder as his lips continued to work their magic. You were on the edge now, every touch sending you closer to the edge.

"Haechan, I'm going to-" You cried out, your body trembling.

"It’s okay baby," Haechan whispered, his voice rough, "Let me see you cum for me."

And just like that, you let go. Pleasure washed over you in waves, your body shaking as you cried out in ecstasy. Haechan's fingers continued to thrust inside of you, milking every last drop of pleasure from your body.

Finally, he slowed down, pulling his fingers out of you gently. You collapsed onto the bed, panting heavily as you caught your breath. Haechan's eyes never left yours as he leaned in for a soft kiss, his hands gently tracing along your side as he did so.

"That was fucking amazing," you whispered against his lips.

Haechan laughed softly, his eyes soft and full of affection. "We’re not done yet." He murmured, gently kissing your forehead. "Are you ready?"

You nodded eagerly, “Please!”

Haechan’s eyes were full of longing as he slowly removed the rest of his clothes, leaving him completely naked. Your breath caught in your throat, your heart pounding as he moved closer, crawling on top of you.

“You sure?” he asked, his voice low.

You nodded, biting your lip as you felt him position himself at your entrance. “Stop teasing me and fuck me.”

Without another word, Haechan thrust inside of you in one smooth motion, filling you completely. You cried out in pleasure, your body adjusting to his size.

Haechan's lips crashed into yours as he began to move inside of you, each thrust sending pleasure coursing through your body. You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him closer as it built inside of you.

Your moans echoed around the room as he continued to thrust, his eyes never leaving yours.

"Fuck me harder," you pleaded, your voice shaking slightly.

Haechan's eyes darkened at your request, his movements becoming more aggressive. You felt a new wave of pleasure build inside of you, your body desperately needing release.

"Shit, I'm so-so close," you cried out, your hips bucking against his.

"Wait," Haechan gasped, his thrusts becoming more rushed as he tried to push himself deeper inside of you.

Finally, you reached the edge, your body trembling as pleasure washed over you in waves. "Haechan, I'm gonna cum!"

Haechan's eyes rolled back, his own orgasm building inside of him. "Cum for me," he urged, his voice deep and hoarse.

You cried out as your orgasm hit, your body shaking uncontrollably beneath him. Haechan's eyes were filled with desire as he watched you cum.

His name escaped your lips as each wave of pleasure crashed over you. Haechan's own release was close. He thrust hard one last time, groaning as he came deep inside of you. Your eyes never left his as he rode out the aftershocks of his own orgasm, his breath hitching in rhythm with his movements.

After a final kiss to your lips, he collapsed beside you. Both of you panting heavily. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you close as he kissed your forehead.

"Express shipping was so worth it."

nct dream/general taglist: @johnnysuhbmarine @haechansbbg @chenlesfeetpic @lostinneocity @naqkja @anaisalive @jaeminnanaaa17 @zen00016

[enjakey]

Beneath the Blue

Pairing: marine engineer!Jake x marine biologist!Fem!Reader

Hey guys, I realise this fic is like really long (24k). I’m so sorry but it’s just something I’ve been holding out on. Life’s been stressful and writing was the only thing that kept me afloat and I kinda belted this out during my sleepless nights. This is definitly not proof read.

So I guess I wanted to give you guys like a guide on how to read the fic. Each section or chapter is marked by bolded words in the beginning of a paragraph (you’ll understand when you read it). If you’re only here for the cutesy stuff, you can go ahead and skip to the fourth chapter but you’ll loose all context of the story and how everyone is related to each other. The first two chapters is just a lot of world and character building. The third chapter is where things actually start.

If you’re interested in marine biology and sea creatures, this is a perfect read. I talk a lot about sharks and whales and sea creatures. There’s a lot of insight on what marine biologists do in general. There’s suggestive stuff in the end of the seventh chapter and smut in the tenth chapter if you want to skip to that. Jay, Heeseung and Jay are a huge part of the fic (but not the plot?). There is mentions of PTSD and a storm.

I want to mention that this story is not just about Jake and Y/N’s romance but about a group of people’s love for the ocean. The other characters are important for me too and the world I’ve built is dear to me. Hope you guys enjoy! I Put a lot of time effort into this! Please like and reblog and comment.

Summary: taken under the wing of the great marine biologist Henry Sim, Y/N finds herself getting close to him and his family. She’s friends with his first son, Jason, but is apprehensive of his second son, Jake. Jake, who is notorious for his bad behaviour and disappointing decisions, finds himself being drawn to Y/N and her undeniable love towards the ocean. When the two are put together in a group of researchers for an expedition for three months on the ocean, she doesn’t expect herself to fall for him- let alone, fight storms for him.

Y/N was one of those unfortunate kids who had to be in a hospital during her birthday. She was eleven at the time, the age where she was learning to read and write on her own and didn't fuss with her mother to help her bathe or dress up. She considered it her golden age where she was just starting to learn about her interests by surfing the internet through her father's phone and transitioning from cartoon shows to movies. At school, she would talk about action films, starring Tom Cruise or Angelica Jolie, rather than the deemed childish Disney movies where the Jonas Brothers were thrown into a music camp or in which a girl hides her identity by switching wigs.

An unwanted growth, widely mistaken as a malignant tumour by many doctors, was manifesting on the bone just above her eyebrow and she had reached the age where surgeons could successfully remove it without life-threatening complications. Y/N was initially scared, refusing to get out of bed in the morning and crying while she was taken to the Operating Room. In that moment of panic and fear, she didn't feel like the brave and mature girl she thought herself to be but somewhat similar to the girls on the playground who still talked about Barbie dolls and played around with make-up sets as though they could ravishingly decorate their faces with cheap lip gloss and colourless eyeshadow.

When she woke up from an anaesthetic daze, she took a moment of silence to compare herself with the other children in her class. If any kid was in her situation, being taken into surgery by a group of a dozen strangers who were only trusted because of a piece of paper- their certificate- that was meant to credit their skill, they would flail the way she had. The girls she avoided, the mean and blonde-haired ones who snickered at anyone who didn't wear skirts and pink bows in their hair and bragged about their powerful daddy's luxurious car, would probably react the way she did, perhaps even a little more dramatically. The boys she arbitrated, the cocky and lanky ones that talk about Fortnight and whatever online games they played, would probably wail like babies. But Y/N was different, whatever that meant for a girl her age, withholding herself from succumbing to middle school's criteria for popularity and burrowing herself into a circle of comfort. She was the girl that wore glasses and carried around a thick book about animals to read during lunch and she was the girl that only had one friend because they were both weird and quiet. She was the girl that cried before the surgery because she didn't trust the surgeons and not because she was convinced her parents were selling her to an organ-harvesting cult.

While she assumed most children her age would be amused by artistic renditions of unicorns and rainbows painted on the wall, she found them rather tacky. Their eyes were too shiny and their smiles were too wide and the only thing she found realistic were the tiny chips of paint in the bright colours. There was a painting of Jake the Dog from Adventure Times sitting right above her hospital bed, staring down at her with lifeless and beady eyes while she tried sleeping during the night because the hospital wanted to keep her for observation for a day or two after the surgery, increasing the service bill at the same time. Then, there was the poorly mimicked roar of a lion stained to the wall on the right side of her bed, making her wonder if these paintings were done by previously admitted children. To the wall on the right side of her bed, right below the window, was the painting of a grinning shark and a randomly doodled jellyfish.

"That looks like the Black Sea Nettle," she pointed at the jellyfish with her nimble finger.

It was early in the morning and her mother had willed her awake from her slumber so one of the doctors could check on her vitals and change her bandaid. Y/N chewed on a green apple slice her mother handed her because she refused to eat the red apples, and patiently waited until the doctor, or Doctor Karev, as he called himself, could finish writing on a piece of paper they called a chart and changing the cotton wedged between her eyebrow and white gauze. She glanced at the painting from the corner of her eye, finding it eerily similar to a picture she saw in the book her father gifted her on her ninth birthday- The Encyclopedia of Animals.

"And that looks like a Bull Shark," she said and shifted her finger slightly so it was pointed at the cartoonish shark with a bulging stomach.

"Oh, yeah?" Doctor Karev scoffed and grinned similarly to the painted shark. His gaze didn't lift from the writing pad he held towards his face, a pen scribbling information that probably wasn't important. Her mother stood beside her, a proud smile on her face as she brushed Y/N's hair with her palm. "What can you tell me about it?"

"I know that their bite is much stronger than the Great White," she offered, shrugging and looking at her lap.

"Really?" Doctor Karev almost sounded sceptical. "Where'd you learn that?"

"A book," Y/N mumbled and pursed her lips.

Doctor Karev bent his knees enough to reach her level, tilting his head affectionately to grasp her attention. His pen was now hanging in his pocket, his writing pad pressed between his hand and thigh. "You're a smart girl, aren't you?" He praised her, impressed by her skill of comprehension. "You wanna become a marine biologist?"

"Marine biologist?"

The pair of words put together were foreign to Y/N but somehow, they sounded like they were meant to be beside each other, creating the word for the profession she had been dreaming of since she saw the picture of starfish lounging on a sea bed. Her eyes were filled with somewhat of a fascination, a sparkle reflected by what she considered a discovery and fate of luck and her smile grew ten folds, stretching her cheeks until the corners of her lips reached her ears. She looked like she was watching the stars while she looked at him, blinking and burning from a close distance as she marvelled at the masses.

"Yeah," Doctor Karev enthused. "You know, study the ocean and sea creatures and all that jazz."

"I'm gonna become a marine biologist!" She nodded, giggling like a baby that had been handed a lollipop bigger than its face. Except Y/N's lollipop was a profession, a dream to chase until it was fulfilled. Her mother laughed with her, shaking her head at her antics. "Mom, I wanna be a marine biologist!"

Doctor Karev chuckled and stood straight, making his way to the door of her hospital room and looking over his shoulder to steal one last glance at the girl he might have just paved a future for. "By the way," he said. "Happy birthday kid."

It was a crystal blue sight Jake could never get used to, and it was the fact that his family owned it that he could never wrap his head around. The aquariums ranged from floor-to-ceiling tanks holding hundreds of litres of water and aquatic species to small fish bowls holding the tiniest, most common breeds of fish. Any type of fish he could think of- sharks, whales, stingrays, eels, jellyfish and cephalopods- it was probably all there, confined between glass walls, concrete and artificially plated corals. And it could all be placed in the palm of his hand, the happiness of customers and livelihood of every creature in the building he stood in, under his control.

In all of Jake's life, he had only ever seen his father angry four times- three of those incidents pertaining to tragedies faced in The Marine Foundation of Korea, his most prized possession.

The first was when he was forced to step into court for the first time in his life. During the first week that it opened, a kid tripped and fell into an eel tank and was almost choked by a Black Spotted Eel. The kid was lucky they weren't electric but Henry Sim was still faced with a million-dollar lawsuit which they won after giving security camera footage that showed the boy clearly wandering off into prohibited territory and climbing ladders into the opening of the tanks. It wouldn't be the first lawsuit they faced as a similar one followed two years later when a little girl started crying because her necklace fell into the dolphin pool and one of them devoured it.

Two years later, one of three Whale Sharks had passed away in front of a live audience causing the building to rumble as the carcass made contact with the forged ocean bed and children to wail in confusion as one of their favourite shark buddies was sinking to the floor. Hundreds of people took videos and the news went viral online, causing critics to criticise the maintenance and care for the captive creatures. As this information circled to tourists, they didn't have customers and a proper flow of income for the following six months until they announced the new exhibit for the endangered Vaquita Dolphin. Jake remembered the terrible nights of those six months when his father would come home drunk or would shatter glasses onto the walls. He wondered how his mother coped with him. He wondered how he and his brother didn't perceive him as a monster yet.

A year later, The Marine Foundation of Korea would face another tragedy. One of the shark tanks exploded in the middle of the night, causing Hammerheads and Tiger Sharks to swim through the halls of the first floor in shallow waters. Guards were panicking and emergency services took hours to reach the aquarium before they could assess and plan a rescue. The aquarium was shut down for two months and they spent time reinstating the shattered shark tank and brewing up safety measures for when similar situations would occur again. That night, they lost two Hammerhead Sharks and one Tiger Shark and had to pay thousands of dollars as compensation. Though his father didn't violently drink, he had become dangerously silent in those two months, scaring the living daylights out of his wife and children.

Henry Sim, the founder of The Marine Foundation of Korea and the most remarkable marine biologist known to all generations, had faced lawsuits that almost made him go bankrupt and was hated by the internet for months until he publicly apologised yet he would say his biggest disappointment wouldn't lie in the way his aquarium was run. Rather, he would say his biggest disappointment lay in his son, Jake Sim, who refused to take in his footsteps and fulfil his dreams of creating an empire of nepotism to take over the world of marine biology someday.

"You never listen to me," Henry seethed with a balled fist resting on his ebony table. His voice was entirely stark for the disappointment he felt towards his son.

If Jake concentrated enough, he could hear the movement of each aquatic species in the tanks he was surrounded by. The bubbly and almost ear-blocking white noise engulfed him sometimes and he would be transported to an unnamed beach where the sand was white and the waters were so clear, he could see the corals growing underneath. He liked to imagine himself floating in the waters in shorts and an oversized white t-shirt, eyes closed as the sun beat down on his porcelain skin. That was all the ocean was to him; someplace to enjoy and someplace to destress. But to his father, it was a career he made billions in and it was a career he wanted both his sons to endeavour in.

"I've been telling you since I was a kid, appa," Jake sighed, standing on the other side of the ebony table. "I want to study engineering. Marine biology, researching new species, the ocean… All of that has always been a hobby for me. Besides, you have Jason to take over your legacy anyway. I don't get why you're so hung up on me studying it, too."

In the corner of his father's office stood a small, well-kept fish tank with a lone seahorse in it. It was the Knysna Seahorse, to be exact, the rarest seahorse in the world which Jason, his brother, gifted their father as a gift. He had paid quite an amount of money to get a hold of it and the reason for the gift? It was because he had finally graduated with a marine biology degree a few months ago and Jake was to finally attend the same university.

But he didn't want to and his entire family was very well aware of the fact.

"Don't you understand what I want for you two, though?" Henry slammed his fist against the table but Jake offered no reaction. "Don't you see the future I see for you two? Brothers taking over marine biology's legacy? It’s not too late for you to change your major."

"No," Jake stomped a foot to the ground, eyes squinting to slits. "That's your dream. Not mine. I get that you and your brother never got along and that you want your sons to get along and run a business. But I don't want that. Jason and I are fine as it is and you coming in between my dreams is just gonna drive me away from you further."

"Jake-"

"If eomma were here, she would understand," Jake took long strides towards the door, a hand digging into the pocket of his slacks as the other twisted the doorknob. "I just wish you'd understand," and his voice muffled under the slam of the door, leaving Henry dumbfounded in his seat, mouth agape and glasses sliding off his nose.

With his son leaving so disrespectfully, using his wife's death as emotional manipulation, he wanted to shun Jake right then and there. He wanted no relation to him whatsoever but he knew it was his anger speaking. And he knew that if he hastily cut him off his earnings and stopped paying for his education, he would regret it and Jason would condemn him as a worse father than he already was.

So, Henry let him walk away and he went back to work, fixing his glasses and clearing his throat as if nothing happened. Jake was still young, he'd tell himself. If he wanted to follow his dreams, he should let him. Henry was selfish, he accepted it and his ego clashed with his conscience but he brushed it off and walked out of his office with more errands to complete. The moment he entered the hall with tanks of jellyfish surrounding him, the sounds of their bodies pushing through water syncing with his racing, angry heart, his assistant joined his side with a clipboard and pen, her heels overpowering the serenity of his silence.

“What’s next on today’s itinerary?” Henry asked with his hands clasped behind his back, strides becoming slower with every step.

“You need to meet with the university students today, sir,” Hae, his assistant, stated as though she expected him to remember the important occasion.

“Don’t speak to me in that tone,” he grumbled. “Of course I remember.”

“I’m assuming the talk with your son went badly?”

“I don’t know what to do with him, Hae.”

With this sigh echoing the moment, the pair made their way through the shark exhibit that costed him millions of dollars to fix all those years ago and sauntered past the stingray tanks, wondering how he was going to be an inspiration to a group of marine biology students while he felt like a failure of a father. He wondered what else he had to contribute to the field of marine biology when he had prioritised it for his entire life. It was the reason why his son hated him and it was the reason why he lost his wife- it was his lack of presence and immense ignorance that put him in a place where he truly had nothing else to lose. He had the money, the cars, the friends to brag with and an eldest son who was succeeding in life without his help- but then there was his youngest, defying him in all manners and reminding him of the mistakes that haunted his life.

However, a beacon of hope, a ray of sanguine had entered his life that day and he wouldn’t realise it until he was laying on his deathbed. In the group of future marine biologists he met that day was Y/N, standing amongst the crowd meekly with a notebook and a pen to jot down everything that she thought would help her education and career. She was the one answering questions in a whisper when no one else knew the answer, her hand barely raised in the air. When Henry saw her, her hair tied in a ponytail and clothes put together in a hurry that made her look pathetic, he could only smile. Because as he looked at her, he saw himself- the version of him that was left in the gates of his college, the version of him that had to be left back in order to become the tycoon that he was now.

So before the group of university students left, he found himself asking Y/N for a conversation and pulled her towards the gift shop while the rest of her classmates waited at the gate, murmuring and whispering about what they could be talking about. Henry placed a heavy hand on her shoulder and smiled at her the way a mentor would smile at his mentee. He had a proud smile on his face as he said, “I think you’d make an amazing marine biologist one day.”

“What?” Y/N, the poor girl, having been put down by her classmates her whole life, was gaping at his statement. Her eyes reflect a sense of hope and surprise under the golden lights of the gift shop.

“Yes,” Henry nodded enthusiastically. “I would like it if you worked with me, I could easily offer you a job,” he said. He shuffled his hand around in the pocket of his blazer and pulled out his business card and handed it to her, certain that it would come in handy for her future. “When you’re ready for a job or an internship- anything, just call me and I’ll help you out.”

Henry walked away from her, leaving his future student dumbfounded. Her eyes fixated on the business card in her hands, her thumbs and forefingers outlining the corners of the rectangle. It was a navy blue colour, his name, number and The Marine Foundation of Korea carved in golden ink. It looked like her ticket to a new life, the life she had chased since she was a little kid carrying around an encyclopaedia of animals. It was the golden ticket in her Charlie and The Chocolate Factory.

It was a good analogy in her head. Henry Sim, the man with greying hair and diminishing eyesight, was Willy Wonka and she was Charlie, the lost boy that simply wanted a taste of something better, something great. So when it was time for her to get an internship, Henry had taken her under his wing.

“You must be Y/N.”

When Y/N started off as an intern, she started questioning whether she had made the right choice. Some of her friends were off travelling the seven seas to research unknown species of the depths and others were working in labs established on beach sides. They were living in tropical islands like the Caribbean or Hawaii and their instagrams were filled with them in diving gear and sea creatures in their natural habitats. Y/N had always dreamt of a life as such, to swim with sharks and study their behaviours or to explore the depths of the ocean floor within the safety of a yellow submarine. She imagined she would travel the world by the time she graduated college and she imagined spending most of her days on a boat, whale watching or spotting dolphins.

There was that one semester in college where she got an experience as close to what she imagined. She, along with a few other promising students, were selected to spend a semester on sea where they spent learning how to dive and sail ships. It was a memorable four months, really, to spend it with a group of people she later called friends and bonding with people on sea over half cooked fish. In that time, though the most astonishing creature they spotted was a Red Octopus, she assumed she was being trained for the future she had always dreamed of, only to end up within the confines of an aquarium- Asia’s largest aquarium, granted. Her job description as an intern included watching other employees take care of the confined species or listening to Henry, the founder, teach her more about the marine species while she took notes. There were the occasional times she was asked to write a research paper, which she did with Jason but she would much rather prefer doing the same in a lab on the beach or on a boat sailing across the Pacific Ocean.

During this time, she pondered if she should have just followed her father’s footsteps in becoming an astronomer. She would look back at her childhood when her father would teach her about constellations and planets while she looked through the giant telescope that was perched on their roof and she would wonder if such a job would make her happier. She recalled the stories her mother would tell her as a Greek historian and wondered if she should have majored in History instead. She even wondered if she should have followed her friends into their jobs instead of taking the internship in the first place. Her uncertainties came to a halt a year ago, though, when Henry promoted her as manager.

In the five years that Y/N started working in The Marine Foundation of Korea, she learnt the names and voices of everyone working there. As the manager, it wasn’t only her job but also her duty to do so, to know who she was working with and grow a personal relationship with the people around her. She knew that one of the janitor’s kid had a heart condition and she would visit him in the hospital once in a while. She knew that one of the divers working for the aquarium was in a long term relationship and was planning on proposing to his girlfriend soon- she could recognise his voice even while he struggled to speak underwater. She also knew that her boss and legal guardian, Henry Sim, had ambitions he could never fulfil because of his youngest son.

One could call her the all-knowing within the walls of the aquarium. Not only was she intelligent, she was the keeper of all the employees’ worries and burdens.

In those five years that she spent reaching her level of success, to be able to buy her own apartment in an expensive neighbourhood and to be able to afford to buy a new phone without double-checking her bank account, she had learned a lot of tricks to perfect the skills of managing the establishment that she ran when the owner wasn’t present. A once shy and timid girl became the hard-headed, thick skinned superior that demanded precision in completed work and pristine publications of whatever research papers they release. But when she wasn’t acting that way, she was calm and walked down the crystalline hallways of Korea’s beloved and prestigious aquarium with a welcoming smile.

Of all the people she knew that worked amongst the aquarium, of the few people she found herself acquainted with, the voice that was breathing into her ear from behind her did not belong to anyone she was familiar with. She could feel his chest ghosting against her back, his smirk louder than his voice could ever be. His hair brushed against her cheek and Y/N found herself spinning around with a scowl on her face.

“Jake,” she stated with discern, her obvious distaste towards him sitting heavily on her brows. His smirk only grew wider, his hand clasping behind his back as he leaned closer to her than before.

In the years that she’d known Henry and Jason Sim, she had grown rather close to them. They accepted her into their family by some sort and she was invited to every dinner they hosted in one of those fancy Chinese or Sushi restaurants- whether she attended or not was up to her. If she did attend though, she would be introduced to guests like she was Henry’s own daughter and Jason had always treated her like a sister by the way he kept her company throughout her years as an intern. Her parents, too, had grown quite fond of the father and son.

Jason and Y/N’s friendship, Henry always used to say, was unexpected. He expected them to work together and get along with each other for the sake of their jobs and business, but he was never expecting the siblingly bond they had created. Oftentimes, the pair would find themselves going out for lunch together during breaks or driving to the beach just for the sake of having some entertainment. They would regularly find themselves at each other's houses in the middle of the night with beers and soju in hopes of having movie marathons. Somewhere in that friendship, Y/N learnt a lot about the missing Sim brother.

He was studying Engineering somewhere in Australia, she learned, and he had only visited his family only a couple of times in all his years of education. There was the one time he flew back to Seoul to spend the New Year with Henry and Jason where she heard he got embarrassingly drunk and broke a glass table. Then there was the other time he visited for Christmas but disappeared within an hour without a word. Speaking of Jake meant hearing stories as such, where he was disrespectful, unexpectable and had no sense of respect. She heard that he once cussed at a shareholder because he was being too nosey.

Y/N had only ever met Jake once. Well, they didn’t exactly meet, she had just seen him passing by in a crowd. It was at another one of Henry’s lavish dinner parties where round tables were cloaked with gold cloth and napkins folded into cranes. Golden chandeliers lit above groups of conversations and amongst one of those stood Jake with overly styled hair and a suit too expensive to be bought with his own money. He was talking to some investors- or business men, she didn’t know- with one hand in his pocket and the other holding a wine glass he languidly sipped on. She was told by Jason that it was one of those rare times Jake didn’t make a scene during a party but she also heard he took a random girl to a hotel room for a one-night-stand, never to call her again.

“You say my name with such loathing,” Jake pointed out, his eyes narrowing as his teeth peeked behind his smirk. “I’d get if my dad and brother talked to me that way, but what did I ever do to you?”

Y/N took a step back, crossing her arms across her chest and tapping her heel lightly against the carpeted floor. She looked at him vexed, her mouth pursing into disinterest. Jake stood back straight, moving his hands into the pockets of his jeans and tilting his head in curiosity. If Y/N didn’t know any better, she would call him a pervert and get him thrown out of the premises by one of the guards just because she wanted to.

“I’ve heard enough stories to make a judgement,” she stated firmly.

“Is that any way to talk to your boss’ son?” He taunted.

“I frankly don’t think he’d care.”

Jake chuckled, lowering his gaze to his feet and shaking his head. His smile was bright, the crystalline waters that surrounded them reflecting on his face. A HammerHead shark from the tank behind him swam across him, followed by a Sting Ray and those animals held more of her attention than he did. “Sorry we got off on the wrong foot, Y/N,” he said and sauntered away from her, assuming he was making his way towards his father’s office. Her eyes followed him but she looked away when he glanced at her from over his shoulder. Clearing her throat, she found herself walking towards another floor of the aquarium.

Jason was right, she thought, his accent really is annoying.

Instead of the tunnel she was observing before, she was now in a fairly confined room with rectangular fish tanks one over the other, covering the span of all four walls, apart from the door. In the tanks were miniscule jellyfish that were soon to be moved to one of the larger tanks for the public to gush at. Of all the places in the aquarium, this room was probably the one she visited the most. Not because it was her favourite or anything but rather because these creatures needed most inspection. If the temperature was changed even a little bit or if the water was getting too dirty, there was a chance that a whole batch of these jellyfish would simply disintegrate.

It had happened once before, not under her watch but some other intern, who failed to notice the decrease in temperature in the room. It was a waste of a lot of Henry's money and it was also one of his favourite species that had met their demise. Because of the intern’s mistake, he yelled at him in front of the majority of the other staff and fired him. Since then, Y/N had always been cautious around her work. Perhaps it was why he was always so fond of her- she never knew why.

“Y/N?”

She flinched when she heard Jason’s voice, his head peeking into the room from the small crack of the door.

“What is it with you and your brother scaring me today?” She breathed, her hand placed over her chest.

“You met him?”

“Yeah he was walking down the tunnel, made nice.”

“He annoyed you, didn’t he?”

“Yup.”

“His first impressions are always bad.”

Jason was leading her out of the room, bringing her to the ground floor where she saw tourists and customers flocking towards the ticket booth. If there was one thing about Henry she never understood, it was the fact that he refused to digitalise the ticketing system. In fact, he refused to digitalise many things in the aquarium. He had the physical copy of every research paper published by the The Marine Foundation of Korea and his logs were still done by hand. Technology hates me and I hate technology, he would always say and this mostly stemmed from the incident where he accidentally deleted all his pictures from Google Photos.

“Isn’t an excuse to breathe down my neck,” she argued as he led her to his office.

“Damn.”

“Yeah,” she pressed. “He talked to me like he’d heard of me.”

“Obviously he’s heard of you.”

“No, I mean,” she paused, looking to her side to make eye contact with him. She wasn’t sure how to explain it, so she stuttered and used animated hand gestures to make her point. “Like he knows me.”

“Yeah, well, dad and I talk about you to him all the time.”

“What the hell?”

“In like, a business way,” Jason defended. “He asks how work goes and you sometimes come up in the conversation.”

“And what do you tell him?”

“That you’re good at your job?” He raised his brow, a confused smile meeting her look of disbelief. “Don’t take it the wrong way, he’s honestly probably just jealous.”

“Jealous?”

“Dad trusts you more than him, you know?”

Before Y/N had the chance to respond with a confused remark, perhaps even a puzzled expression, Jason was pushing open the door to Henry’s office and they were met with the sight of Henry sitting on his desk and Jake standing beside him with a grin, leaning towards whatever he was being shown on the monitor screen. Jason and Y/N settled in the chairs on the other side of the desk, the former confidently crossing one ankle over the other knee and the former confused as to why she was there in the first place. Jason had to tug her sleeve to keep her from squirming and looking around confused. There was a moment of silence that passed, Y/N’s gaze zipping between Henry and the tanks his office was surrounded by. Henry murmured to Jake while pointing at his monitor, analysing something Y/N and Jason weren’t aware of. Jake nodded along, pinching at his bottom lip in thought.

“Y/N?” Henry called. She answered with a curious hum, her brows raising. “You’re free next week? Thursday?”

“Yes, why?”

“Well, you know,” Henry brought his attention away from the monitor and towards her, pushing his glasses farther up his nose with his pinky. “I told you about it. An old friend of mine is opening a restaurant with a huge tank. He wants us there on opening night.”

“Oh, right. I remember,” she nodded.

“What, Mr. Bahng didn’t invite me?” Jake stood back straight with his arms crossed, his grin refusing to leave his expression. He looked between his father and brother, only glancing at Y/N once before continuing to tease them.

They, of course, did not find him amusing. “All of us, Jake,” Jason replied with a roll of his eyes.

“Yes, and it’s going to be a rather quiet gathering,” Henry continued. “So I expect you to be on your best behaviour.”

“When have I ever let you down, father?” Jake chuckled; Henry rolled his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Y/N,” Henry looks at her with tired eyes. “He’s got all sorts of fish in his tank, he’s even got a Whale Shark in there-”

“Woah, what?”

“Yeah, I know, it cost a fortune but anyways,” Henry waved off. “He wants to know fun facts- his words, not mine- about all the species he’d got in there so could you be a dear and…?”

“Yeah, no problem,” Y/N grinned and patted Henry's hand that rested on his desk. “Anything but having to socialise with strangers.”

“Can I join her?” Jason chimed, pointing his thumb towards her.

In that moment, Henry glanced between his son and favourite-slash-best employee and they resembled children asking whether they could take a break from studying to watch cartoons. His eyes twitched, thinking that he didn’t want to deal with annoyance other than his younger son. “No,” Henry said. “You’re socialising with strangers. So are you, Jake.”

Jake, who was about to open his mouth to protest with a finger raised in the air, gulped and dropped his hands down to his sides and nodded with pursed lips.

The opening night to Mr. Bahng’s restaurant was a spectacle. What was planned as an intimate gathering turned into a media spectacle. Paparazzi flocked the entrance of the restaurant and bodyguards had to hold back the public as the handsome sons of Henry Sim, the founder of The Marine Foundation of Korea, walked the red carpet. Minor celebrities, a few actors and foreign entertainers attended the evening- some spotted the Jenner Sisters and others hollered at Jason Momoa and Leo DiCaprio. DiCaprio was an old friend of Henry’s- they met through ocean conservation funds and over the years, he had earned a permanent place on Henry’s invite list and vice-versa. Y/N had the pleasure of meeting him once, barely for a few minutes, for a hand shake and to be introduced as the aquarium’s manager and top researcher.

Y/N walked the red carpet with her arm looped with Jason’s, her free hand holding the hem of her sparkly dress in order not to trip in the ruckus. Her hand would occasionally come up to shield her eyes from the camera flashes and Jason had to repeatedly catch her frame because she was tripping on her heels. They were both dreading to see how the paparazzi pictures would turn out the next morning. Jake, on the other hand, walked confidently with a hand in his pocket and the other waving and blowing kisses at everyone. Photographers and netizens were gawking at the Australian engineer graduate, asking for pictures and photographs but ultimately being turned down. He was famously known on the internet for his looks, Prince Charming-like looks and mannerisms. His personality? It was a mystery to all those on the internet, further feeding into delusions of young fan-girls. It was only Jason and Henry that filmed for interviews for the world of marine-biology, often showing up on the news to promote The Marine Foundation of Korea or to talk about their next big break-through in marine sciences.

Henry and Mr. Bahng were the last to walk the carpet- they were the highlight of the event, after all. When they finally entered the restaurant, the glass doors were shut and bolted behind them, bodyguards taking their place in front of the premises like they were protecting The Sphinx. What was inside the restaurant might as well be as valuable as The Sphinx- there were barely any lights to illuminate the subtle interiors of the restaurant. Circular tables spanned the floor, glass windows towering the walls for the public to see inside if it weren’t for the black curtains. Everything else was painted black, too- the walls, the tables, the black marbled floors. The tank however… The tank glowed blue, just like the tanks in the aquarium. It spanned the entirety of one of the four walls in the restaurant. Schools of fish swam by, accompanied by Stingrays, Hammerhead and Leopard sharks. A lone Mola Mola swam by, its eye holding a vacant stare as it scanned the spans of the restaurant on the other side of the glass.

The showstopper, however, would only make its presence when Y/N finally made her way towards the exhibit. Her heels clicked against the black marble, one hand holding the hem of her dress and the other clutching her purse. The loose strands that fell from her hair up-do fanned her shoulders and just as her bangs bristled her eyes, the Whale Shark swam past the tank. It glided effortlessly across the water, its massive and speckled body moving with a hypnotic grace, throwing Y/N into a trance. She stood in awe, eyes scanning for when she could see it again, acting like she didn’t see Whale Sharks everyday in the aquarium. It was the ambiance of the restaurant that made the tank more mesmerising, if she had to be honest. She’d never seen anything like it.

Jake didn’t get a chance to admire the premises yet, sucked into meeting the guests and investors with his father and brother. When he found a chance to slip away, he made his way to the bar and ordered himself a double shot of whiskey. He promised himself that it would be his first and last drink, remembering his promise of behaving for the night. The last time his father brought him to a public gathering, which was almost two years ago, he almost set the venue on fire and broke a glass table. Scowling at the memories he dug up, he took a seat on a black stool at the bar, wandering his eyes around the guests and seeing men and women of power mingle in unexpected cliques. Finally, his gaze landed on the tank, the main attraction of the night, its hue misting the ambience and painting his skin in a sparkling blue. He admired it, watching the Whale Shark languidly make its way back and forth across the tank, sucker fish clinging onto its skin and a lone Leatherback Turtle following it.

Eventually, his eyes dragged towards the far corner of the restaurant where he found the back of Y/N’s silhouette. She, too, was admiring the tank. Gripping his glass of whiskey, he made his way towards her, a sly smile gracing his lips and the whites of his eyes twinkling brighter with the blue hue. As he walked closer, he could make out the familiar color of her dress that he spent the whole limo-ride staring at. It was a sparkly blue and silver dress, thin straps that barely held the dress up her bust. Her hair was put up in a messy bun, two hair pins with silver sea turtles holding it in place. Her earrings matched her hair pins and her heels matched the silver of her dress. The blue hue colored her skin and he swore he was looking at a still-life painting.

“Where’d you get the dress from?”

Y/N looked over her shoulder to catch Jake’s smirk that she learned to despise through Jason’s anecdotes. The smirk that led to his many one-night-stands, his smirk that led to all the decisions that made his father angry at him, the smirk that led to disasters was the same smirk that was walking towards her. Her serenity pulled into annoyance and Jake could see it in her eyes, her brows wrinkling and her lips sneered.

“Hey, I’m just playing nice,” he offered, trying his best to shrug and surrender his motivations. He took another sip of his whiskey, keeping his gaze fixed on her expression.

Y/N turned her body to face him and now, his eyes were wandering down her frame, staring at all the curves of her body that her dress showed off, just as he did in the limo. “It’s an old dress, I wear it a lot,” she admitted. Then, she knocked a nod towards the glass in his hand. “Let me guess, fifth drink of the night?”

“Come on, the night just started,” he rolled his eyes, the gnarly smirk refusing to leave his expression. “It’s my only drink of the night. Promised dad I’d behave, remember?”

“Right,” she swallowed. The hand that was holding the hem of her dress moved to clutch her purse, both her hands pressing into stomach. A water came around with a tray of appetizers, ironic that it was all seafood. Jake finished his drink and handed the empty glass to the waiter, taking two pieces of appetizers- one for him and one for Y/N.

Silence engulfed them as they stood side by side, both now facing the tank and staring at the creatures and coral spanning across her, the only sound being the loud swishes of the water and their chewing. Y/N was not staring to admire anymore; she was staring to distract herself from the awkward presence, to pass time in any way that she could.

“Aren’t you supposed to be socialising?” Y/N asked, hoping he’d realise and leave.

“I’d rather stare at this than socialise,” Jake said, both his hands digging into his trousers.

He wasn’t sure what stories his father and Jason fed Y/N about him for her to hold onto her negative impression of her. She probably thought he hated his family’s line of work, to read about water and the ocean beds and fish all day. In reality, he loved marine biology, he truly did. But he wasn’t going to apologize for not seeing it as his career. Jake still went to the aquarium of every city he would visit, spent time reading the articles and journals his father published and watched marine documentaries in his free time. He even had a small fish tank in his apartment back in Australia- he had two Firefish Goby and two Cardinalfish. He loved marine biology so much, he specialised in marine engineering. He wasn’t sure if Y/N knew that.

“Can I ask you a question?” Jake turned to her. She raised her brows in curiosity, coaxing him to continue. “Why this?”

“What?”

“I mean, why this?” He pointed at the fish tank just as the Whale Shark swam past them again. “Fish tanks, standing in one place, staring, the aquarium. Why, when you could have gone to bigger research centers like in Hawaii, or something?”

Jake almost regretted asking the question when he saw the expression on Y/N’s face turn solemn. She brought her bottom lip between her teeth, chewing as though she was chewing her brain to find him the answer to his question. Not so she could give it to him but because she wanted to give it to herself. Why? She asked herself that, too.

“I don’t know, Jake,” she sighed. “It seemed right at the time and… I guess, I just didn’t know? Who would pass up an opportunity to work with Henry Sim, you know? He chose me. And I’m not saying I regret it, I’ve found family in him and Jason but I ask myself why, too. I miss being out on the waters.”

Ignoring all that she said about his father and brother, knowing it would trigger him, he smirked at her again. He knew how she felt, it was the same thing Jason used to tell him a few years ago. As mesmerising as aquariums were, being out in the sea and seeing marine creatures in the wilderness is like cutting to a surgery intern. Jake had only gone on an ocean expedition once his whole life. His father took him during high school while he was applying for universities in hopes of changing his mind about his major. Jake remembered loving it, being enamored and lost in what the ocean had to offer, to witness its mystery with his own eyes. But unfortunately for his father, it still wasn’t enough to replace his love for engineering.

“I get it,” he assured her. “Don’t worry though. It won’t be this way for long.”

Before Y/N could ask what he meant, to make him elaborate, they heard Henry hollering their names from across the restaurant. He was waving their hand at them, Jason standing beside him sulking in boredom. Jake and Y/N speed-walked towards him, joining him at the table along with a scholar of jellyfish biology.

“Bahng is going to give his speech soon. Sit,” Henry told the pair.

Mr.Bahng’s speech went on for longer than most would like. He stood in the middle of the room with a drink raised in the air, thanking his family, friends and colleagues for making his dreams come true. His daughter stood beside him, trying to calm his influenced-state but it had all only turned into a comical predicament. Y/N caught Jake eyeing the daughter, knowing she must have been one of his old conquests. Most women she knew of her age who ran in the same circles were all probably one of Jake’s old conquests. She wasn’t going to shame these women, she understood the appeal- the wide smile, the sparkling eyes, the smooth hair and dashing facial features. However, she wouldn’t miss a chance to shame Jake, especially around Jason.

Sick and bored of it all, Jason signaled to Jake to grab a drink with him at the bar. As the pair stood up, leaving Y/N alone with Henry and the jellyfish scholar, Henry questioned the pair.

“No more drinks for Jake,” he warned.

“One more can’t hurt. I’m fine,” Jake defended himself, only to be met by an eye roll and a wave of his hand, telling them to go away and come back soon.

The brothers ordered whiskey for themselves. They’ve been told all the men in their family were whiskey enthusiasts. So is their father- apart from the phase he had when he was an angry drunkard, hammered with cheap beer and vodka most of the nights. Now that it had subsided, he was back to whiskey and that too, only rarely.

“Have you not told Y/N yet?” Jake asked his brother as they settled down onto the tall stools. By then, Mr. Bahng’s speech had ended and the room erupted in small talk again. Y/N’s ears were probably being ripped off by the jellyfish scholar but knowing her, she was definitely enjoying the conversation.

“Told her what?” Jason looked at him with utter confusion.

“The research team? Summer expedition?” Jake tried jogging his memory.

“Oh, right!” Jason nodded, sipping on his drink and hissing when an ice cube touched his teeth- it was a pet peeve he’s had since he was young, but he loved the taste of cold beverages. “We wanted to surprise her. Dad knows how much she’s been waiting for this so we’re gonna tell her on a better day.”

“Oh, God. I was on the verge of telling her,” Jake frowned.

“But she doesn’t suspect anything, right?”

“Nope, not a thing.”

“Crisis averted, then!” Jason assured him. “Dad and I are still figuring out how to tell her. Got any ideas?”

“She hates me, I’m sure she doesn’t want to hear any good news from me,” Jake chuckled.

“Y/N doesn’t hate you,” Jason Looked at him baffled and confused, mouth pulled upwards in surprise.

Jake scoffed. “Yes,” he said. “She does. And it’s because of the crap you and dad feed her.”

“Jake, she doesn’t hate you. I know when Y/N hates someone and she doesn’t hate you,” Jason chuckled. “She’s just a bit apprehensive of you and I don’t blame her. You’re a character-”

“Thanks, man-”

“And she takes time with certain people. To be fair, people like you aren’t her scene.”

“I’m not her scene? The fuck does that mean?” Jake laughed, finishing the last of his drink.

“Jake, you’re the drink and let’s party kinda person. She’s not. She likes peace and quiet and books and fancy sofas to sit on. She’s just quiet, dude. Give her time.”

“Yeah, fair enough,” Jake rolled his eyes.

Just then, Y/N found her way to Jason’s side, the click of her heels stopping at the stool beside him. She had an annoyed expression on her face, her eyes tired and almost lifeless. “Your dad’s calling. We’re going home,” she deadpanned and turned to walk away, the hem of her dress in one hand as her hips swayed with more vigour. She was sleepy and tired and if the limo didn’t drop her off at home, she was going to crash in Jason’s bed.

Sunlight danced across the crests, water stretching endlessly into a mosaic of light and motion. Gentle swells rolled beneath the research vessel while occasional whitecaps broke against the hull of the boat. Y/N lay stretched on the warmed deck, salty breeze tickling her stomach and bringing frizzy curls to her hair. Clad in a striped bikini, she left little to the imagination. It was an early morning for her, seagulls mulling over the Indian Ocean and skies still painted with a pink hue. Everyone on the team was still asleep and she took the opportunity to seize the morning.

The first person to wake up was Sunghoon, one of Jake’s friends, who happened to be an oceanographer and drone operator. He studied ocean currents and temperature changes and learned how to pilot drones in order to collect data on plankton blooms. Without him, the entire whale research expedition would be impossible. Sunghoon greeted Y/N with a drowsy smile, clad in only a pair of shorts himself, taking in the morning sunlight.

Following him was Jay, one of Jason’s friends, who was a cetologist and acoustic analyst. He was rubbing a towel against his wet hair, waving at Y/N who started to put on her shirt out of a slight insecurity that crept onto her cheeks. Behind him, Jason and Heeseung joined with plates of toasted bread and a carton of orange juice. Jason threw a piece of bread towards Y/N and she swiftly caught it, thanking him for breakfast.

Heeseung was known as a young prodigy in the field, perfecting his skills in steering and working as the boat captain and field technician. Jake, too, came aboard as a field technician- a marine engineer himself. In fact, If it weren’t for Jake, Henry Sim would probably have never agreed to this whale research expedition in the first place. Jake wanted to test out new equipment that was hitting the market and who better to test the equipment than The Marine Foundation of Korea? It took a lot of convincing and buttering up his father to convince, yet here he was, heading an entire project by himself with some of his closest friends. If Y/N had squinted hard enough at the predicament, this was basically a vacation for a bunch of fish nerds.

She sat on the deck with her legs brought to her chest, chewing on the soggy piece of bread and watching as Jake finally made his way towards the group of boys with a bowl of scrambled eggs in his hand. Vaguely, she could hear Sunghoon say, “your father must finally be proud of you,” and Jason circling back with a sarcastic comment. It made the group rumble with laughter and Y/N felt herself cracking a smile too.

It was probably around three months ago when Jason and Henry broke the news to her. She was coming back from having a measly lunch at a convenience store nearby and had entered Henry’s office to collect a few files. When she opened the door, Jason and Henry had been waiting for her with a cake in their hands and beaming smiles on their faces. “If you’d walked in any later, I would have started eating this thing without you,” Jason chuckled at her, pulling out a plastic knife from his pocket.

Y/N looked at the pair with confusion, eyes darting between the greeting brows of Henry and the grinning mouth of Jason. Then, her eyes fell towards the chocolate cheesecake they were holding, the word “Congratulations!” pipped on with melted chocolate. She recognised this cake. It was the same one they’d buy for every one of her birthdays she spent with them over the past five years. However, the absence of “Happy Birthday!” threw her off- also, the fact that it wasn’t her birthday.

“What is this for?” She asked, feeling as though this was almost a mistake. This cake was expensive and she almost felt guilty. “Guys, nothing’s happened,” she widened her eyes, shook her head and waved her hands in front of her to demonstrate no.

“What do you mean, Kkomaya?” Henry chuckled. “You’re gonna be part of a research team. That’s a huge thing to celebrate.”

“What?”

“Yeah.”

Jason handed her a piece of folded paper that was tucked away in his blazer. It read the details of a whale research expedition that would take place during the summer and span into autumn season. Y/N could barely skim through the details when her eyes landed on the plethora of signatures that filled the end of the paper. She recognised Henry, Jake and Jason’s signatures and some of a few government officials that signed off on the research expedition and agreed to fund for it. Right beside Jake’s signature was an empty dotted line, waiting for Y/N’s signature.

“You’re joking,” she gasped.

“Sign it so we can cut this cake and celebrate, Y/N. My hand’s getting sore,” Jason chuckled again.

“Oh, right. Sorry!”

What followed next was a string of excited screams, giggles and jumping around until Y/N finally signed the paper and threw herself into Henry and Jason to hug. Then, they cut the cake and each enjoyed a piece, the rest to be distributed amongst the employees of the aquarium in light of good news. A few moments later, Jake entered the room, coyly making his way towards Y/N to give her a handshake. Since the night of Mr. Bahng’s restaurant opening, the pair had developed a healthy rapport. He would visit the aquarium sometimes, bumping into Y/N in the process and making polite conversation. He made efforts to be a little more respectful towards her, packing away his cocky personality only in front of her. She once asked him why he was spending so much time in Korea, leaving his job in Australia and he responded aloofly. She got her answer now.

Now, it was the end of May and Y/N was on a research vessel with an unfamiliar group. Though she spent a week getting to know them before leaving for the expedition, seeing them interact on the deck, throwing around jokes like they’d known each other their whole lives… she wasn’t sure how to act that way. She felt like the odd one out, the loose end. Jake and Sunghoon were childhood friends; Jason and Jay were college friends and Heeseung was Mr. Bahng’s oldest son so Jake and Jason had known of him since they were kids. She’s met him a handful of times before, including the night of Mr. Bahng’s restaurant opening. But she didn’t know him like everyone else did.

“Y/N!” Jason waved for her to come over and she did, lifting herself off the lounging chair and walking towards them. It was their third day together on this vessel and she still wasn’t sure how to approach anyone when they were grouped together. She hated saying it, but she relied on Jason to include her when it came to the socialising side of her work. The practicality, however? She was splendid.

“Today’s the day we need to actually start working,” Heeseung said to her as she approached them. Jason made space between himself and Heeseung so she could stand in the circle with them. “It’s mostly Jay and Sunghoon that’s gotta do the work today, figuring out the equipment and all. Jake and I will help. You and Jason stay in stand by, for now. You can go on dives, get your practice on. Just be careful, make sure one of us is scouting…”

And Heeseung rambled on, eventually moving on to telling Jay and Sunghoon what their itinerary consisted of. Y/N’s eyes wandered off to the ocean, water spanning for miles on end, no land near site. They were in the middle of nowhere- well, not literally. They knew their coordinates. But if their equipment were to damage or if one fell overboard, they were as good as dead. It’s moments and opportunities like these marine biologists spend their lives working towards- what Y/N spent her days waiting for.

“So, that’s final?” Sunghoon started. “Jay and I will get the hydrophones, then?”

“Yep,” Heeseung clasped his hands together and everyone started dispersing, mumbling words of encouragement and affirmations, pumping their fists in the air or clapping to get their spirits up.

Before everyone had the chance to disappear and get their gear prepared, Jason stopped everyone and said, “should we make, like, a group chant sort of thing?”

“Yeah, that’s not happening, mate,” Jake pursed his lips and patted his brother on his chest. Y/N chuckled and the rest of them laughed while walking away to continue their work.

It took Jay and Sunghoon a total of four hours to deploy the five units of hydrophones, both floating and anchored. While diving, they would constantly resurface for air and call for Jake, yelling, “What kind of new technology is this, you twat, I prefer the old ones!” Their anger bubbled, frustrated at the fact that a two hour process was taking them double the time only because of the unfamiliarity. After their fourth complaint, Jake ended up diving with them to help.

Heeseung stayed with Jason and Y/N to help test and calibrate the hydrophones. While they sent test signals, Y/N cursed under her breath, too, telling Jason, “we could have just used the old equipment. This new shit Jake brought us is not user friendly.”

“People thought that about the iPhone but they love it now, don’t they?” Jason offered, hoping to reduce Y/N’s distaste. She could only respond by rolling her eyes.

By the time they were done, the sun had started setting and the divers barely ate food. The trio that stayed on the vessel cooked a heavy dinner with whatever ingredients they had, feeding the divers the second they freshened up. The group assembled on the deck, the same place they were huddling in the morning, with blankets wrapped around their shoulders to shield from the chilly breeze.

“Where’s Jason?” Jake looked around.

“He’s finishing with the final sample recordings. He’ll be up in a bit,” Y/N assured.

Jason came back with six chairs, one for everyone to sit on as they debriefed for the night. Warm water was passed around as conversation fluidly changed from work to personal history. The stars were shining unfamiliarly, a sight Y/N couldn’t get in the city anymore. She was reminded of her father who used to point to the constellations and tell her their names. As a kid, she knew most of them by heart. Now, she was unable to recognise most of the constellations, only being able to pick out a few.

“Add in a bonfire and the night would be perfect,” Jay sighed, shivering as he hugged his blanket tighter.

“Oh, we used to go camping a lot in college,” Jason mused. “Those were the times, man. Young and alive.”

“I’d say you’re living it up right now as well, bro,” Heeseung laughed, referring to their boat that was in the middle of the ocean, whale watching and diving as a part of their job description and getting paid above average.

“True,” Jason scratched the nape of his neck in embarrassment. Jake further made fun of Jason and Sunghoon joined in, throwing pieces of crumpled paper from their notebooks at him.

“Look at the stars, guys,” Heeseung directed everyone’s gaze towards the sky. “You don't have nights like these in the city anymore.”

“I was thinking the same thing,” Y/N nodded. “Gotta take it all in before we leave.”

“We’ve got three months for that, don’t worry,” Sunghoon assured.

“Hey, Y/N, wasn’t your dad an astronomer?” Jason clocked his head. “He used to teach you when you were a kid, where each constellation was?”

“Yeah, how’d you know?”

“You told me, like, a really long time ago.”

“Your dad did physics in college? That’s so cool,” Jake pipped, sitting at the edge of his chair and directing his excited smile at her. He’s always had a habit of becoming excited at the mention of physics and math- the entire reason he went into engineering.

“Do you still remember some of the constellations?” When Heeseung asked, Y/N nodded. “Do tell us,” he encouraged.

Bringing her bottom lip between her teeth, she looked up and squinted her eyes to see if anything looked familiar. “Do you guys see the diamond shape?” She heard everyone confirm with a hum. “That’s The Corvus or The Crow. Dad used to say that the crow was a messenger from the sea.”

”Wah,” she heard Jason and Jay exclaiming as she continued searching.

“Do you see a teapot, perchance? Right there,” Y/N attempted to show them its correct location by pointing and once again, she was met with a group of hums. “That’s The Sagittarius. It contains the center of the Milky Way.”

”Wait, I’ve heard about this,” Jake snapped his fingers, trying to jog his memory. “Didn’t sailors use it to locate the galactic core or something?”

”You’re right, I’m surprised you knew that,” Y/N smirked and tried finding another constellation.

In the background, Sunghoon pondered aloud on what it would be like if he could name a constellation after himself and it brought the group into a laughing fit. Jake, though he laughed with them, kept his gaze on Y/N, admiring the way her nose tilted upwards and gaze reflected the starry sky. Jake, who once picked up a book on astronomy out of sheer curiosity and gave up on reading it due to its lack of logic and mechanics, found himself leering as she explained the stars to everyone.

“Do you guys see the red star? That’s Antares, the heart of The Scorpion,” she explained.

”Wow,” Sunghoon started and snapped towards Jake as though he had a revelation. “Wait, isn’t that your constellation? You’re a Scorpio, right?”

”Yeah, how’d you know?”

”I’ve known you your whole life, asshole. Don’t tell me you don’t know my zodiac.”

”I do, I do!”

”What is it?”

”Sagittarius! I thought about it when Y/N pointed it out, I swear!”

Then started the narration of Jake and Sunghoon becoming friends. Jake’s mother, Vivian, moved into the street that Sunghoon’s parents, Daniel and Emily Park, lived in. Both couples were newly weds, just getting back from their honeymoon. Vivian had already been pregnant with Jason at the time and because her and Emily grew close, she was there the day Jason was born. When their husbands were off to work, Emily would often spend her time with Vivian, taking care of her and Jason. Around a year later, Vivian fell pregnant again and Emily announced her pregnancy exactly a month later.

The two mothers spent all their time together thereafter, going to the hospital for check ups together and supporting each other through pregnancy yoga exercises. With each other's support, they didn’t worry about their husbands working overtime. They even hired a nanny together, shifting between houses to help with household work and with Jason, who was still too young to understand his surroundings at the time.

Jake and Sunghoon were born a month apart, Jake being the older one. Emily was in the hospital while Vivian gave birth and vice versa. Henry and Daniel were in wonder of their friendship- it was like it was out of the movies, utopian for the society they lived in today. It was a good thing the two families found each other in this dog-eat-dog world.

Jake and Sunghoon went to the same schools, same clubs and festered the same hobbies so they could do everything together. Their mothers used to joke that they’d end up falling for the same girl one day. “And what would you do if that ever happened?” Emily used to ask Sunghoon and he would respond with, “boy code- I’ll stay away from her if he likes her and I know he’d do the same for me.” In fact, he did and when a similar situation arose in middle school, neither of them got the girl because they valued their friendship more.

Around the time Jake and Sunghoon were old enough to perceive and build on their imaginations, they started pulling pranks on Jason. It was the nasty ones- like, putting saran wrap on the toilet seat or sticking gnarly notes on his bag before he left for school. Once, they rolled a skateboard into him while he was walking into his bedroom and he fell face first into the floor, breaking his nose and costing his parents an emergency trip to the hospital. Jason and Jake didn’t speak for a full month after that incident.

When Jake and Sunghoon turned sixteen, the Park family started talking about relocating to China. Daniel had better job prospects and he was convinced that his children, Sunghoon and Yeji who were four years apart, would receive better education. “And international exposure is always good for a child,” he’d tell Emily. Sunghoon would argue that he wouldn’t leave the country until college and Yeji would cry about not wanting to leave her friends.

It was around this time that Henry opened The Marine Foundation of Korea and started earning more. Their family moved to a more expensive neighbourhood but that didn’t stop Jake and Sunghoon from spending most of their time together. In fact, when Henry had gone on his drinking spree due to the lawsuits and backlash, Jake would run off to Sunghoon’s house, leaving his poor mother and brother to deal with his scary father. When it came time to decide upon college and careers, Sunghoon sat through arguments with Henry to allow Jake to pursue his passions in engineering.

When Jake and Sunghoon started senior year in high school, Vivian was diagnosed with uterine cancer- stage four. That year was filled with tragedy and character change from Henry. Though they spent a fortune on hospital bills, Vivian’s health rapidly declined. The two families started accepting the fate that was to come and Vivian came to an honorable death. What made the children’s period of grief insufferable was that the tabloids had picked up the event and started bombarding the Sim family with unrelated questions. It made Jake want to run away.

Around that time, Sunghoon’s family did end up relocating to Taiwan where Sunghoon pursued marine biology (being truly inspired by Henry’s work) and Yeji continued her high school education. Jake flew off to Australia to pursue engineering, despite his father’s wishes, and estranged himself from his family. For over a year, Henry and Jason only got updates about Jake from Sunghoon. Eventually, though, the three made peace.

It had been almost a decade since Vivian passed away and over three years since Jake and Sunghoon completed post graduation from living across the world from each other, yet their friendship still ran strong. They called and texted each other religiously, making sure their friendship lived on through whatever they were doing in life. Being on this research expedition was like a dream for the pair- everything had somehow worked out perfectly.

“Do you miss your mom?” Heeseung found himself asking the Sim brothers.

“Yeah, of course,” Jake shrugged and slumped further into his chair. Sunghoon reached over to comfortingly pat his knee and he cracked him a smile.

“I miss her all the time,” Jason said. “I’d like to think she’s in a better place.”

A long time ago, when Jason first told Y/N about how his mother passed away, she noticed that there was never an air of solemness or pity when he spoke about her. It was tragic and unfortunate, but Jason never let that reflect in himself. He always spoke about his mother with confidence or a smile on his face, celebrating her existence as a smart woman and amazing mother. He never let anyone show him pity about the fact that he lost his mother too young. He simply chose to idolise her, keep her alive through his happiness and through his achievements. She realised, after narrating basically his whole childhood, that Jake was the same. When he spoke about his mother, he didn’t let his voice cloud with pity and he described her with love and adoration.

“Isn’t it lucky that you ended up doing marine engineering?” Sunghoon said to Jake.

“I love engineering but I do love the ocean, too. Shit’s in my blood- dad shat on me for no reason,” Jake rolled his eyes and Jason threw back a piece of crumpled paper at him. Annoyed, Jake bounced his leg up and down. “You know what we forgot to mention?”

“What?” Sunghoon asked.

“Do you remember when Yeji had the biggest crush on Jason?”

With that, Sunghoon let out the biggest groan and threw his head back, hiding his face under his hands. Jason leaped at the memory while Heeseung, Jay and Y/N begged Sunghoon to show them a picture of his sister. Jake started scrolling through his phone to see if he could find any.

“What do you say, Jason?” Jake wiggled his eyebrows at his brother.

“Dude, grow up,” Jason rolled his eyes. “She was a kid.”

“Not anymore! Isn’t she, like, working right now, Sunghoon?” Jake teased.

“I’ll actually kill you,” Sunghoon deadpanned.

“I think they’d make a great couple, though!”

“Dear lord, not this again,” Jason groaned. “The four of us talk all the time, we literally have a group chat. Stop making it weird.”

From what Y/N could gather, this seemed like a conversation the three had frequently. Jake would mention the pairing of Jason and Yeji and Jason and Sunghoon would get riled up and throw a fit. Jake would then continue to list down the reasons as to why should start dating for the millionth time and the other two would turn him down for the millionth time. After seeing a picture of Yeji, she understood why Jake said they would make a great pair.

The first time Y/N saw Jason and Jake side by side, she told them that they looked nothing alike. And they truly didn’t- everyone would always be surprised when they told them they were siblings, only one year apart. Jake had stronger features, a sharper nose, defined jawline, almond eyes, thick lips and curtain-like hair. Jason, however, had lighter features with a button nose, round eyes, fluffy hair and puppy-like lips. They were both handsome, there was nothing to deny, just in polar different ways.

“I think this is a sign for us to sleep guys, It’s gonna be early morning for all of us from here on,” Jason announced and was the first to get up.

Everyone followed him to the sleeping pods, six beds fitted to the walls like bunk beds. If they stared hard enough, the room almost looked like a jail-cell but none of them really took it to heart. They wouldn’t be spending much time there anyway. Y/N slept in the bed above Jason’s and Jake slept opposite to her. That night, she found herself drifting off to sleep while desperately trying to focus on his features, the softness of his expression as he slept.

“This is our first drone test,” Heeseung announced and Sunghoon planted himself beside him with the drone and controller in hand. It had almost been a week since they deployed the hydrophones and it took them a week to perfect how to use them. Improvements were going slower than expected but a majority of the reason for this expedition was to test the new equipment so they learned to not complain as much. Finally, they decided to move on to the next piece of equipment, the drone, that Sunghoon was going to manoeuvre.

“Are we ready?” Sunghoon called. Everyone answered with a hum, dressed in scuba gear in case they needed to dive at the spotting of any whale, they told themselves. In the few days that they were at sea, they found it concerning that they spotted everything but a whale. “Alright, let’s go, then!”

Everyone watched with curiosity, intent and awe as the drone lifted higher into the sky, becoming a speckle of dust to their eyes as Sunghoon controlled it with grace. Jason monitored its camera through his laptop, paying close attention to anything that it could capture. They all stood around watching the screen for around ten minutes, Sunghoon still standing at the edge of the doc as he controlled the drone.

When the fifteenth minute came around, everyone started to lose hope, dispersing to do their respective work with grumbles and sighs. The twentieth minute came around and Jake asked Sunghoon if the new version of the drone was better than the hydrophones. He confirmed with a nod, his lips slightly parted as he concentrated his fingers on the controller and his eyes towards the sky where he could still see the drone. Bored, Jason and Y/N started playing thumb wars and Heeseung and Jay started discussing what the next day’s itinerary would be- Sunghoon let out a gasp.

“Guys, look!”

Everyone ran towards the laptop screen and vaguely, they could see the outline of a large fish, slowly gliding through the ocean currents, around twenty feet away from them. It wasn’t blue- a deep brown and grey, rather. It could have easily been a Bryde’s Whale. At this realisation, everyone elated and Jason ran to check if the hydrophones were picking up any sounds or echoes.

“I’ve got nothing,” Jason shook his head.

”What do you mean? Let me check,” Jay took over and after a few seconds of listening, he too concluded the same thing. “Are you sure the hydrophones aren’t glitching again?” He asked Jake.

“No, I’m sure,” Jake assured.

”Guys, it’s not too far from us. You can go check it out,” Sunghoon hollered to everyone, noticing that the silhouette was moving closer and closer towards the vessel.

Within the next ten minutes, Jay, Jason, Jake and Y/N were diving headfirst into the water. The rush of the ocean engulfed Y/N, the cold making her realise that this was her first time diving in the ocean since her semester on sea during college. The past few years, she’d kept in touch by diving in swimming pools and facilities but this… the real thing was always better.

Bubbles streamed past their bodies as they tried cutting through the water, their goggles making everything hazy as they got used to the pressure. At a distance, they could see the silhouette of what they hoped to be a Bryde’s Whale. Sunghoon and Heeseung kept an eye on them through the video the drone was transmissioning.

For a breathless moment, a moment where they all hoped that it was a whale they were finally seeing, they truly believed that they were in luck. However, as they swam closer to the giant body, theyr recognised its gaping mouth, unhurried movements and pointy fins as something else. For a moment, another breathless moment, they were disappointed, weight filling their chest in a way the ocean’s pressure couldn’t crush them. But seconds later, they decided to enjoy their discovery- Y/N, especially. It was fleeting, barely a few seconds, but it felt like something unspoken passed between them in that shared moment.

“Guys, it’s a Basking Shark,” Y/N said. “Heeseung? Sunghoon? Can you hear me?”

“It’s a Basking Shark, alright,” Jay said, his voice crackling through the earphones before Y/N could receive his words.

“You know the rules, guys. No touching, only looking,” Jason reminded them.

The group of four stopped swimming, floating in the blue abyss and watching the Basking Shark’s movements. It opened its mouth to inhale water- its way of catching food. It stayed open that way, allowing them to get a full view of its insides. White and dark stripes disappearing into its stomach. Slowly, slowly, second by second, the shark swam their direction, as calm as the wind and ocean before a storm. The divers moved to stand out of its way as it swam past them.

“How many feet do you think it is?” Jake asked.

“This is a big one,” Jay said. “I think 30, maybe 33 feet.”

Y/N knew the answer to this question. Normally, she would be the first person leap at answering. But she was too enamoured by the creature as it swam between them, momentarily making her lose sight of Jay and Jason who were on the other side. She could still see the bubbles floating upwards from their breathing. In a moment of poor judgement, she let her fingers raise to inch closer to the fit on the shark, eyes sparkling with eagerness and anticipation. What would it feel like? What would she feel?

As her fingers reached out, inches away from the shark’s rough skin, she felt a hand wrap around her wrist. Startled, she swung her head around to find Jake’s eyes staring daggers at her. Through his mask, she saw him shaking his head. They hovered that way, his hand on her wrist, eyes moving away from each other and towards the shark, watching it drift away from them and the vessel.

The group made their way back to surface, hearts beating with exhilaration. Sunghoon and Heeseung stretched out their arms to help everyone up, fighting the heaviness of the water. “That was amazing,” Jay enthralled as he ripped his mask off.

The other three settled on the deck, backs slumping onto the railings of the vessel as they heaved to catch their breaths. Their masks were thrown beside them and their wetsuits slipped down their torsos. Jake ran his hands through his hair, trying to restyle its shape; Jason forced himself to stand up so he could make his way to the shower; Y/N sat there, unmoving, staring at her bare hands like she’d just woken up from an unbelievable dream. Then, she lifted her head to look at her surroundings, meeting her gaze with Jake as her head turned. He cracked a smile at her and she turned away, embarrassed.

Nine days. It had been nine days since the Basking Shark incident and they were nowhere close to seeing a whale- Blue Whale, Humpback Whale, Sperm Whale… nothing. There was a moment where Jay was convinced he’d picked up the sounds of whales singing but the noise ended up being interference from debris. However, it wasn’t to say that nothing good came out of the past empty days.

The equipment they were testing had come around wonderfully. Everyone, with due time and patience from Jake, started learning how to use the technology and were on their way to perfecting the techniques. One day, a curious Green Sea Turtle surfaced next to the vessel and stared at them for a full minute before diving away. While hauling one of their retrieval baskets, they realised they'd caught an Isopod and it made Heeseung recoil in horror due to its eerie similarity to cockroaches- that day, they found out Heeseung had a huge phobia of insects. Y/N caught a glimpse of a pod of flying fish through her binoculars. Jake caught a glimpse of a Thresher Shark while everyone else was in the lab and he had headed up for some fresh air.

Sunghoon seemed to be some sort of octopus whisperer. A few days ago, he’d spotted a tiny translucent octopus stuck to the side of the vessel and he stretched himself to reach it. It was small enough to fit on his pinky and wrap its tentacles to cover his fingerprint. It was almost transparent, apart from specks of pigment that floated in its body like dust. Its body pulsed softly in his hand, delicate tentacles fanning out onto his palm to test the surface. Then, he slowly lowered it back to the water. On one of their dives, Sunghoon spotted a Blanket Octopus, a rare sighting that would get the media riled up when the footage was released, and he swam after it until he was too far from the vessel.

That morning, Jay woke up to the sight of a pod of dolphins swimming past the vessel, jumping into the air to create dark outlines onto the orange and pink sky. The rhythmic splash of their bodies against the water seemed to stir the rest of the crew from their sluggish morning routines. One by one, they emerged onto the deck—first Jason, then Heeseung and Sunghoon, followed by Y/N and Jake. The usual grumbles of early wake-ups were quickly replaced by soft gasps and murmured excitement as they took in the sight before them.

“That’s what I call a wake-up call,” Y/N gasped.

“Maybe that’s a sign of luck, guys,” Jay offered. “We should do something tonight.”

“Like what?” Sunghoon asks.

Jay perked up. “Like a night dive?”

Sunghoon, who had been taking a sip of water, nearly choked. “Diving?” He coughed. “At night?”

“Why not? We’ve been out here for weeks, and we haven’t done one yet,” Jay reasoned. “The bioluminescence, the different marine life—it’d be an entirely new experience.”

Jason nodded in agreement. “Plus, it’ll be a good change of pace. We’ve been so focused on the whales that we haven’t really taken in everything else around us.”

Heeseung, ever the cautious one, sighed. “You do realize diving at night is way riskier, right? Low visibility, stronger currents—”

“We’ll take precautions,” Jay cut in. “We’ve got the lights, safety lines, and we won’t go too far from the vessel. It’s a controlled dive, not some reckless plunge.”

A moment of silence passed as Heeseung weighed the risks, scanning the eager faces around him. Finally, he exhaled through his nose and shook his head. “Fine. But if anything even remotely goes wrong, we call it and get out. No heroics.”

A round of nods and murmured agreements followed.

“Then it’s settled,” Jay grinned. “Tonight, we dive.”

Excitement buzzed like static as the sun dipped below the horizon. The group prepared for their night dive with thick dive suits and dive computers strapped to their wrists. Jason, ever meticulous, went through each regulator one by one, testing for air flow. "If your regulator sputters, switch to your alternate immediately and signal me," he reminded the group.

Sunghoon handed out waterproof dive torches while Jay and Heeseung secured backup glow sticks to their vests, just in case their primary lights failed. “If it gets too dark, stick close and don’t panic,” Jay advised. “This is a controlled dive, no one goes deeper than 30 meters. Stay within sight of your buddy at all times. If anyone gets separated, stop where you are, shine your light upwards, and wait for us to find you. Do not ascend alone unless it’s an emergency.”

Jay paired with Jason, Sunghoon paired with Heeseung and, like fate had it, Y/N paired with Jake.

Slowly, they approached the edge of the deck, staring down at the ink-black water, the reflection of the stars rippled into infinite nothingness and for a moment, just for a moment, they felt themselves regretting their decision, letting fear conquer their senses. Sunghoon looked at Heeseung, panic and fear glistening against his eyes. Jake, catching his expression from the other end, assured him with a thumb raised in the air and adjusted his mask.

“We got this, guys,” Jake announced, trying to lift everyone’s spirits. “It’s gonna be an experience of a lifetime.”

As the words left his lips, Y/N’s gaze lifted to meet his through the hazy plastic of her mask, her lashes fluttering as hesitation creased her brow. Even through the dim glow of their dive lights, she could see the warmth in his eyes, the way his expression softened—like he was seeing only her in the vastness of the ocean. Then, as if drawn by an unspoken pull, his fingers brushed against her wrist before slipping lower, finding her hand with effortless ease. Slowly, deliberately, he wove his fingers through hers, his grip gentle yet certain. Her breath hitched as she glanced down at their hands—at the way they fit, tethered in the silent depths—before letting her gaze drift back up to him. He wasn’t looking away. He held her there, in the weightless moment suspended between them.

“Just stick with me, yeah?” He whispered to her. “I promise it’ll be the best time of your life.”

“Alright, everyone,” Jay hollered. “Everyone dive in three… two… one.”

What followed were a sequence of splashes and bubbles rising to the surface of the water due to the impact. The first thing they saw was blackness, their eyes still adjusting to the minimal light of their flashlights. As they splashed around, disturbing the calmness of the water, they saw specks of blue- little emeralds glistening at their friction.

“It’s plankton,” Y/N squealed. “It’s bioluminescence!”

“Can’t get better than this, huh?” Jake squeezed her hand, tuning out the excitement everyone else was emulating.

“This is unreal,” Heeseung moved his hand to trigger another spark of bioluminescence, mesmerized by the living light show.

As they descended further, with patience and caution, they saw the silver body of a Barracuda flash by. Startled, Y/N moved closer to Jake, wrapping her wrist around his bicep. Jason, Jay, Heeseung and Sunghoon had moved deeper and the pair followed, eyes spotting clusters of coral reefs with their blooming polyps. From the reef emerged a biofluorescent Hawksbill Sea Turtle, snapping its mouth open and closed in hopes of finding prey. It moved languidly through the water, ignorant of the divers coming closer to it.

“Didn’t think we’d see this today,” Jason said. “Biofluorescence is common in corals and sharks but it’s only been seen in turtles around 2015. Take it in, everyone.”

As everyone tried keeping their eyes on the turtle, already on the verge of leaving their sight, Jay signals everyone to look towards a rocky outcrop. A flash of pale white flickering into deep brown and they hover in place, watching as a cuttlefish pulsated with shifting hues, blending seamlessly into the seafloor before striking at an unsuspecting shrimp. Just a few feet away, a small octopus stretched its arms along the coral, its skin rippling from sand-colored to a deep maroon as it crept toward its prey.

Y/N, captivated, gestured excitedly at the display, her bubbles rising in bursts. Jake caught her expression and grinned behind his mask, watching as she pressed closer to the scene, eyes wide with childlike wonder. Sunghoon, playing the photographer, raised the underwater camera to capture the display of nature’s most skilled shapeshifters. When the creatures finally retreated into the shadows, the group exchanged excited looks before continuing their dive.

As they moved deeper, the ocean’s silence felt heavier, interrupted only by the sound of their own breathing. It felt like they were in a sharksploitation film, the Jaws background music being the only thing missing. As though Y/N’s thoughts were being read, Jason, who had been slightly ahead, froze and pointed his light downward in a startled haze.

Whatever it was that caught Jason’s attention, it was huge and left a trail of bioluminescence in its wake. They could feel it looming just beyond the reach of their lights. A ripple of tension passed between the group as an immense shadow suspended in the water. No one moved- they were sure not one of them was breathing.

Jay’s fingers curled around his dive knife out of instinct, his heartbeat pounding in his ears. Heeseung, usually calm, hovered frozen in place, his eyes darting between the dark shape and Sunghoon, who was holding onto his camera for dear life. Jake exhaled slowly, bubbles escaping in a steady stream as he tried to make sense of what they were seeing, Y/N clinging to his arm to comfort herself. Steadily, Jason tightened his grip on his flashlight and angled the beam forward. The light cut through the darkness, catching the edge of something vast and smooth. The shape shifted, its outline rippling like a ghost emerging from the abyss.

It was a Manta Ray.

At the realisation, their muscles loosened and Jay kept his dive knife away. They watched it swarm past them, its wings stretching impossibly wide. Just like a ghost, it glided through the water like it owned the place, its pale underbelly flashing in the light. It moved like a specter, unbothered by their presence, its cephalic fins unfurling like delicate ribbons as it turned. With the added effects of the blue bioluminescence, it felt like they were watching a dream. Y/N say them all the time in the aquarium but to see them alive, gliding in their natural habitat, was a different kind of sight.

“How big do you think that is?” Jay murmured.

“Five meters?” Y/N answered. “Easily six… she’s huge.”

Jake felt Y/N’s grip on his arm loosen and like instinct, he turned towards her in. He was met with the sight of her in awe, watching the Manta Ray disappear into the void. As they hovered in awe, Heeseung was the first to react. He gestured frantically, his flashlight beam cutting through the water and landing on something just below them. His wide eyes and rapid pointing sent a jolt of confusion through the group. Jay followed the direction of Heeseung’s light, angling his own beam downward.

A Vampire Squid.

It wasn’t supposed to be here. These creatures lived far deeper, in oxygen-minimum zones, not a mere 20 meters below the surface. Yet there it was, its deep crimson body illuminated in their lights, its webbed arms curling inward as it drifted.

Jason exhaled a string of bubbles, exchanging a stunned glance with Jay. Y/N's mind raced—was it sick? Disoriented? Had something forced it to the surface?

Before they could react, the squid suddenly pulsed its body, releasing a shimmering cloud of bioluminescent mucus—a defense mechanism against predators. Tiny blue specks scattered around it like an underwater firework before the creature vanished into the blackness.

The team remained frozen, the eerie afterglow of the squid's defense lingering in the water.

“What the hell was that doing up here?” Jason finally asked through their comms. No one had an answer.

“I’m not getting a good feeling from this,” Heeseung announced. “We’ve seen plenty. I think it’s time to go.”

With steady nods and eager movements, they swam back toward the vessel, an unspoken unease settled between them. A buzz of confusion filled their dialogue when they broke the water and fatigue settled into their bodies. Some looked back at the Manta Ray and awed, others still concerned about why they saw a Vampire Squid so far up the surface, questioning if they should be worried. Jason theorised that it was probably nearing its life-cycle; from what he could see in the passing moments, it looked quite old.

In practiced silence, they stripped off their gear. Masks clattered onto the deck. Wetsuits peeled away with sluggish motions. Someone yawned. One by one, they disappeared below deck—some for a quick shower, others just to sit and breathe.

Y/N, clad in her bikini and a flimsy shirt, found herself sitting on the edge of the deck, her bare feet skimming the water. Each ripple sent a flicker of blue light swirling around her toes—the bioluminescence responding to her every movement. She could hear the guys deep in a conversation on the other side of the deck, discussing the next morning’s regime. She didn't listen in. She just watched the reflection of the stars, absentmindedly swirling her foot through the water, watching the glow chase her movements.

Then, footsteps. She didn’t have to look to know who it was. The air around them shifted as Jake settled beside her, resting his forearms on his knees. For a moment, neither of them spoke, just watching the light dance beneath them. She could see him pouting from the corner of her eyes, a habit she noticed in him before they even started the research expedition.

“Dinner?” She asked, not breaking her gaze away from whatever was in front of her.

He turned to look at her, damp hair falling in front of his forehead. “Yeah, yeah,” he nodded.

“Hey, I have a question,” Y/N found herself chuckling before she could ask him. Slowly, she turned to look at her, shifting her position so that she could lean back on the palms of her hands. “Heeseung doesn’t know you hooked up with his little sister, does he?”

At the question, Jake found himself cackling, too. “What?” He laughed. “No way,” he shook his head. “I think he’d murder me.”

“Yeah, he definitely would,” Y/N agreed. Then, she let a moment of silence pass between them, mustering up the courage to ask him her next question. “What is it about hookups with you, anyway? Just… why so many?”

“Is that who you think of me as?” Jake’s chuckle never left, his eyes widening as he continued. “We just came back from that… interesting dive and you wanna talk about this?”

“It was a bit scary,” she admitted. “I loved it, but I don’t wanna think about it until tomorrow.”

“Fair, fair. Alright, I’ll indulge you,” Jake bit his lip- another one of his many habits- and allowed his gaze to meet hers.

In that moment, in a fleeting split second, the wall that Jake built to keep caution around her had crumbled. All these months, Jake spent trying to be respectful around her, walking on eggshells to try and gain her respect. And somewhere along the way, she started looking at him like he was his own person- not the annoying little brother Jason complained about and not the disappointing son Henry seethed about. She could see the effort he put in, not only for his work or his family, but also for her. She wasn’t sure why. She almost missed his cocky demeanour.

“I don’t know why you’re so against it-”

“I’m not against it,” Y/N defended. “I’m just not that kind of person.”

“Right,” he breathed. “But I guess… well, I suppose I should begin from where it all started,” at that, Y/N chuckled and nodded to coax him to continue. “So, it was the second semester at college and as usual, I was at some house party. By this time, I’d lost my virginity in high school and everything, right? But I hadn’t really slept with anyone in college. So that night, I met this girl- really pretty, really flirty-”

“And you slept together.”

“And we slept together,” he said. “And me, being the fool I was,” Y/N continued laughing, finding his narrative style quite comical. “Thought that maybe she wanted me to call her the next morning. But apparently she didn’t want that. And nineteen year old Jake was heart broken-”

“And he started going to the gym, came out a cocky ass and started sleeping with everyone because some random girl broke his heart-”

“Hey, hey, hey, don’t make fun of me,” Jake nudged her side, leading her to continue laughing. Her eyes struggled to stay open and her smile refused to die. Jake bathed in her joy. “And to be fair, I started going to the gym in high school,” he pointed a finger at her.

“Yeah, okay, whatever,” she grinned and rolled her eyes.

“But, yeah, anyways,” he continued. “I was hurt by it, obviously. And then I told my friends about it and they were all assholes, by the way. Not the kind you want to have long term relationships with. But, yeah, I told them and they kinda brainwashed me into thinking that I got lucky that this was a no strings attached thing. And to be honest, a few days later, I kinda liked the whole idea, too, I guess? And the party I went to after that- hooked up with another girl. And I guess, the cycle just continued.”

Y/N blinked at him for a second, bringing her bottom lip between her teeth. “No one gets hurt?”

“No one gets hurt,” he assured with a shake of his head.

“How would you know, though?” She asked. “The girl in the context- what if-”

“You just kind of know,” he breathed. “You always kinda know. It’s like a sixth sense… only hook up with people you’re sure who want the same things as you. But don’t get me wrong. It’s not that I don’t ever want to settle down. I mean- I’m pushing thirty. It’s just that… I don’t think I’ve found anyone yet.”

Y/N hummed. “The sex is that good?”

Jake’s grin returned, this time a little mischievous, dangerous. His eyes had a sparkle in them, his pointy teeth peeking behind his smile. “Y/N, the sex…” he rumbled, voice low and breath fanning against her ear. He leaned closer to her. “You wouldn’t believe it.”

Y/N gulped.

Assuming his previous position, his grin still plastered on him, he looked her up and down, taking in the tips of her toes that were still touching the water and running his gaze back to her eyes. Perhaps he was being delusional, clouded by the conversation they were having, but he was sure he saw the spark in her- the spark that manifested through her hooded eyes and flushed cheeks. He could see her squeeze her legs together, nails digging into her palms as she chewed her bottom lip. Her gaze stayed on his hands- his hands that were pulsating with his veins, fingers long enough to wrap her around him.

“Don’t tell me you’ve never-”

“No, I have- Jake, I’m pushing thirty, too,” she rolled her eyes, shaking herself out of her daze. A cool wind breezed past them and she could feel her nippled perking through her shirt- she was sure Jake had noticed. “Dated this guy a couple years ago. I met him as a customer in the aquarium, actually. We dated for, like, a year. The sex was good. Jason hated him, though. Said he acted like a frat boy and looking back, I guess he kinda did.”

Watching her shrug and look away, he licked his lips. His breath was near her neck now, his presence ghosting against hers. “Y/N, you deserve better than good sex- whatever that was.”

“And you’re some expert on sex?” She teased.

They didn’t know when the air between them had changed.

Maybe it had started in that moment- when the world was nothing but rolling waves and flickering bioluminescence. Maybe it had started long before that, slipping in between stolen glances across the vessel, lingering eye contact that lasted just a second too long, and quiet moments between chaos that neither of them dared to name.

They’d be lying if they said there was absolutely no tension building between them over the past few weeks. It had been there, simmering just beneath the surface, waiting.

It was in the way he always seemed to be nearby—not in an obvious way, but in a way that made it impossible for Y/N to ignore. If she was adjusting equipment, Jake was there, his arm brushing against hers as he reached for something. If she was rinsing off after a dive, he’d pass by, running a towel through his hair, his skin damp and glistening with seawater. It was the way she felt his presence before she even saw him.

It was the way their bodies gravitated toward each other—shoulders bumping when they worked side by side, fingers grazing when they passed tools back and forth. The way she’d instinctively reached for him during dives, her hand wrapping around his forearm in the darkness, trusting his steadiness as they maneuvered through the water. It was the way he never pulled away.

Maybe it was the way his eyes lingered on her lips when she spoke, or the way she caught herself staring at his hands—the way they moved, the way they curled into fists when he was frustrated, the way they rested so naturally on his neck when he was deep in thought.

It was everything.

Slowly, silently, inevitably, it had been building up to this moment.

Jake found himself hoisting himself back on his feet, rubbing his hands against his thighs to brush off any dust. “I’m gonna try sleeping,” he said, ignoring the laughter that the rest of the boys started filling in the air. Yet, he didn’t move, eyes fixated on her and the way she seemed to curl further into herself. He waited for her to say something- anything that gave him a hint on what was to come next.

“Okay,” she said, finding herself getting back on her feet as well. “I’m gonna sleep, too.”

“Okay.”

The pair stared at each other for a brief second, his eyes darting between her features and hers fixated on his eyes. The air between them was charged with something neither of them dared to put into words. It was a quiet understanding, an unspoken decision made in the space of a breath. Then, with a nod, Jake led her back to the sleeping pods. They moved quickly, their strides quick and deliberate, as if slowing down would give them time to second-guess. Jake barely spared a glance at the others—Heeseung and Sunghoon talking near the railings, Jason and Jay checking something on the equipment—he breezed past them like they didn’t exist.

By the time they reached the sleeping pods, her heart was hammering against her ribs. She watched as Jake stripped off his shirt, catching her widened eyes of shock and explaining to her that he always slept this way. And she watched as he climbed onto his bed, running his hands through his hair and clenching his jaw from what she assumed was frustration. Then finally, finally, after pretending like they weren’t there for a purpose, he looked at her. He looked at her with conviction, slender eyes coaxing her and lips begging for her.

“Y/N…” his exhale spelt out her name.

His rand reached out for her to hold and she looked at his palm- his empty hand that was waiting to be filled with hers, his empty fingers waiting to wrap around her. So, she complied and took his hand, climbing into his bed and adjusting her straddle on his lap. There was silence, mostly just their heavy breaths filling the air, wondering if this was the moment they’d been waiting for- if this is what Jake was hoping for.

She felt his hands creep up her thighs, slowly and surely attaching themselves to her hips, dipping under her shirt to find her waist. His fingers danced on her skin, almost like he was playing a piano, waiting for her to do something other than to hold onto the hem of her shirt.

“Jake?”

“Yeah?”

He could feel her pulsating through her bikini and his dick twitched in his shorts. He gulped as he watched her hands move towards his chest, the cold of her fingertips sending a jolt down his spine. He let her stay that way, her hands exploring the crevices of his chest. Lifting his head that was resting on the wall, he found his neck moving towards her, and she did the same. Their heads tilted, lips parted and eyes hooded- they knew what was to come. They couldn’t wait for it to come.

“I promise you won’t get hurt,” he whispered, just as his lips brushed against hers, their noses touching. His hands moved higher up her torso, touching her ribs just as she let out a ragged breath-

And just as fast as their moment came, it left when they jolted away from each other. They heard footsteps and grumbled murmurs of the rest of the group mumbling it was a good day and goodnight to each other. Panicked, they scrambled off of each other and Y/N was rushing out of his pod and back into her own- anything to make the predicament seem normal, unusual. Before Jay had burst the door open and everyone piled in, Y/N’s head was already on her pillow, pretending to be asleep.

She could hear Jake greeting everyone and wishing everyone a goodnight- she paid no mind. That night, she couldn't sleep.

The group of six had spent almost two months out on the ocean, in the middle of nowhere, on a metal vessel that they’d been calling home, and they’d still hadn’t spotted a whale. However, they felt no sense of discouragement, focusing on testing the new equipment and going on more dives and collecting more samples for research. They collected samples of plankton blooms, recorded the eerie songs of distant marine life, and encountered creatures they never expected—an elusive blanket octopus, a deep-sea jelly drifting near the surface, even a rare oarfish shimmering like a silver ribbon in the depths. The once-crisp excitement of the expedition had softened into something quieter—a steady rhythm of work, patience, and anticipation.

That day was like no other. The air felt no different and the ocean, as usual, stretched infinitely around them. The sky was a perfect, cloudless blue. Jason was at the research station, analyzing the latest data from their dives, his brows furrowed in concentration as he scrolled through results. Sunghoon and Heeseung were near the stern, arguing about whether or not a gull that had landed on their railing was the same one they’d seen three days ago. Annie sat cross-legged on the deck, flipping through her notebook, jotting down observations while absentmindedly twirling a loose thread on her sleeve. Jake was beside her, leaning back on his elbows, quietly watching the sun reflect off the water.

The late afternoon had been slow, peaceful, the kind of moment where time stretched lazily—until Jay stiffened, his head snapping toward the hydrophone. His heart kicked against his ribs as the sound hummed through his headphones, low and distant but unmistakable. Impatient, he holler for Jason who came running to him, questioning what was so important.

“Do you hear that?” He sucked in a breath as he handed the headphones to Jason.

Jason, eyes widened with hope and shock, nodded. “No way,” he breathed. “No way!” He yelled which caught the attention of the rest of the group.

“What is it?” Y/N craned her head to examine the ruckus, watching as everyone had gathered around the deck. Jay came over with binoculars, waving it around in the air. Somehow, without needing any explanation, everyone understood what the excitement was about. It was happening. It was finally happening.

Keeping her notebook aside, she made her way towards the rest of the group, leaning against the railing in anticipation.

“I think they’re a few kilometers away, we should be able to see them soon,” Jay concentrated on his sight through the binoculars, face squirming with concentration.

Everyone simply watched the horizon, waiting for a disturbance to break the surface of the ocean. For a few moments, they saw nothing and Y/N went back and forth from listening to the sound on the headphones, a melody so ancient and otherworldly that it sent shivers down her spine, and looking back at the horizon. She was on the brink of losing hope, watching as Jake and Sunghoon broke apart from the group with their heads hung low, looking at everyone like they were fools for thinking they were lucky until-

It finally happened.

Gasps of awe filled the air as the others scrambled to grab their binoculars and cameras. Sunghoon nearly tripped over a crate in his rush, and even Jake—usually calm and composed—had an unrestrained grin on his face as he followed Y/N to the railing.

A towering column of mist rose into the air, catching the evening light like a shimmering ghost. The sound of the exhale followed a second later, a forceful blast from beneath the waves. The water churned violently as the massive shape surged upward. For a split second, the ocean seemed to hold its breath—then, a whale erupted from the surface. A colossal Humpback Whale launched skyward, water cascading off its slick skin in torrents. The sheer size of it was staggering. Its massive pectoral fins spread wide, and for a breathtaking moment, it seemed suspended in midair—a creature far too large to belong anywhere but the sea, defying gravity itself.

Everyone froze. No one breathed.

Then, in a heartbeat, everyone burst into a rumble of excitement as the whale slammed back into the water, sending an explosion of white foam and waves rippling toward the vessel. The force of it sent their stomachs lurching, but no one cared. Y/N’s hands flew to her mouth, her eyes blown wide.

“Oh, my God,”she said, unable to get her feet to move as Jay had scrambled back to the computer to see what the hydrophones had managed to record. “It’s singing!” Heeseung had screamed repeatedly as Jay fought to not let excitement shake his posture.

Sunghoon bolted for the camera rig, yanking the telephoto lens into place. “Holy shit, that was a full breach! I need a better angle—someone hold this steady!” Heeseung grabbed the tripod as Sunghoon adjusted the settings.

Jason scrambled toward the data log, frantically typing timestamps and environmental conditions into the system. “We need to record the water temp, salinity, GPS coordinates—someone grab the readings!”

As the crew erupted into action around them—rushing for cameras, hydrophones, and data logs—Jake didn’t move. He barely even breathed.

He was watching her.

Y/N stood frozen at the rail, her hands gripping the metal so tightly that her knuckles had gone white. Her eyes, wide and shining under the soft glow of the afternoon sun, stayed locked on the spot where the whale had breached. She looked completely lost in the moment—like the world had narrowed to just her and the ocean. The excitement, the rush, the frantic calls of the others—it all faded into white noise for Jake. He saw her throat move as she swallowed hard, lips slightly parted like she wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words. She didn’t even reach for the binoculars or her notebook. She just stood there and let everything happen.

Jake had seen her fall in love with the ocean over and over again these past few weeks. On the night dive, when she saw bioluminescent creatures flicker to life for the first time. In the quiet hours before dawn, when she let her fingers trail through glowing waters. Each moment had stripped away something guarded in her—had pulled her deeper into the thing she loved most.

And now, as she stood there, wholly consumed by the sight before her, Jake felt something in his chest tighten. She was beautiful like this—untethered, weightless, alive. In a moment of fleeting adoration, Jake wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She leaned into his chest without hesitation, mouth still agape, eyes still locked on the sea. Jake felt her exhale, felt the way her body melted into his. Slowly, confidently, he pressed a kiss to her forehead. His lips lingered, his eyes closing like he wanted to keep this moment exactly as it was. The weight of unacknowledged moments, flickering electricity had shifted into something else over the past few weeks- something, softer, lighter, deeper.

Y/N had stopped second-guessing the way she naturally gravitated toward him, the way her body angled toward him whenever they stood together, the way she reached for him without thinking. And Jake? Jake had stopped holding back.

He still teased her, still challenged her, still made her roll her eyes—but now, his affection was deliberate. When she handed him something, his fingers would brush hers and linger. When she got caught up in her work, he’d bring her water without a word. When she sat alone at night, tracing patterns in the bioluminescence, he’d sit beside her in silence, just to exist in the same space.

Finally, Y/N tilted her head up to look at him, her expression open in a way it hadn’t been before. No teasing smirk, no quick remark—just something warmer, something unspoken but completely understood.

Jake’s lips quirked into a quiet smile. “A lot of firsts for you these days.”

Y/N exhaled a small laugh, nodding.

“Think we should get to work now,” he offered and she meekly nodded.

Jake let her go and moved with quick precision, checked the equipment on deck, making sure the hydrophone was secured and that no water had splashed onto their more sensitive instruments. “Sunghoon, tell me you got that on camera,” he muttered.

“Barely!” Sunghoon yelled.

Y/N stayed close to the railings, keeping her eye out on the huge mass of shadow moving past the surface of the waters, just in case a whale surfaced again.

After spending days with whale songs filling the air, making their mornings, Sunghoon sent out his drone again and detected an entangled whale. After debating whether they were allowed to intervene, something about rules and regulations, they agreed to help the creature. Fear that it would die without sooner intervention and the excitement of being inches away from a whale, possibly being able to touch it, the group devised a plan of action.

Heeseung and Sunghoon stayed on the vessel as look-out through binoculars as the rest manoeuvred a small boat towards the hurting whale. It was only a few feet meters away from them but reaching it through the rough waters seemed like a task, all of a sudden. The waters were usually never this rough- first time in all the weeks they’d been on the ocean.

The water was colder than expected as Jake, Jay and Y/N descended, the massive form of the whale looming beneath them. Up close, the entanglement was worse than they’d thought—thick netting dug deep into the whale’s pectoral fin, restricting its movement. Y/N and Jay worked swiftly, slicing through the strands while Jake positioned himself to keep them steady. The whale remained eerily still, its eye just barely visible through the shifting blue.

Then, without warning, it thrashed, perhaps because of the sudden attention it was getting from foreign presence or perhaps from the pain of entanglement. The sudden burst of movement sent a powerful current surging around them. Y/N was thrown backward, Jay barely managing to steady himself. Jake instinctively reached for her, pulling her close before she could drift further. For a tense moment, they remained suspended in the water, waiting to see if the whale would calm. Slowly, its movements settled, and they resumed cutting. One final slice, and the last of the netting unraveled, drifting away into the depths. The whale hovered for a moment before, with a flick of its tail, it surged forward- free at last- and the three watched as it swam away from them.

“I can’t believe that just happened,” Y/N said. “I can’t believe I just did that- we just did that.”

Upon arriving back on the vessel, the team moved on autopilot—securing equipment, hauling themselves aboard, and stripping off their dive gear. A string of celebratory huzzas were passed around as Y/N slumped against a chair. The air was thick with exhilaration and exhaustion, breaths still uneven from the dive. Sunghoon handed Y/N a towel as she squeezed the seawater from her hair, her mind still in the depths, replaying the whale’s final surge to freedom.

Jason was already hunched over the laptop, fingers flying across the keyboard as he analyzed the recordings. "The change in vocalizations—it's real," he muttered, half to himself, half to Jay, who leaned over his shoulder. Jay's grin was unstoppable. "We’re really hearing this in real-time. That’s insane."

The others busied themselves cleaning up, but the adrenaline was still too fresh to settle. Heeseung cracked open a bottle of water, while Sunghoon replayed drone footage on his tablet, scrutinizing every frame. "We actually did it," he murmured, half in disbelief.

Y/N, however, found herself drifting away from the commotion. She was exhausted and desperately needed rest for her eyes. Her arms went slump and legs felt heavy and when Jake spotted her heaving breath, he made his way towards her, offering himself as a pillow. The pair slumped on each other, Jake running a hand up and down her arm as she drowned out the commotion around her.

“Just a few minutes,” she mumbled and nuzzled deeper into his chest, hugging his torso. Jake chuckled.

Their peace didn’t last long, though. Jake felt it before he saw it, the subtle shift in the air, the way the horizon darkened like spilled ink bleeding into the sky. A low rumble rolled across the sky, so distant at first that no one paid it much mind. But then came the wind—sharp, biting, and sudden. The gentle lull of the ocean turned erratic, the once-glassy surface growing restless beneath them.

A storm was coming. Fast.

“Storm’s rolling in,” Heeseung called from the helm, voice edged with urgency. “We need to secure everything—now.”

Y/N’s eyes shot open as her mind registered what was going on and everyone started moving in sync, doing what their training had taught them to do. Like it came out of nowhere, sheets of rain lashed against the deck, making it nearly impossible to see more than a few feet ahead. The ocean had turned violent, monstrous waves slamming into the vessel with enough force to send them stumbling. Sunghoon and Jay held onto the railings, Jake and Y/N barely finding a way to make it to safety as Heeseung and Jason controlled the steering. They could see them, their faces contorting with strain as they helped each other manoeuvred the wheel.

A rogue wave—towering, relentless—rose like a wall before crashing down onto the deck. The impact sent equipment flying, knocking everyone off balance. A sickening crack sounded through the storm, followed by a sharp, agonized cry.

“Jay!”

As Sunghoon hollered, he ran towards Jay on the unsteady vessel, fully equipped with the knowledge that they could be thrown overboard by the waves and the wind any second. Jay was crumbling against the rain, body twisted in pain as he held onto his forearm. “I think I broke it,” he repeated over and over again as Sunghoon carried him towards Jake and Y/N.

Jake and Sunghoon exchanged a look that Y/N couldn't decipher, a sort of language the two friends had accumulated through their years of friendship. When the vessel rocked again, Sunghoon grabbed Y/N’s arm and tried his best to get them inside- to safety, hopefully. Jake dashed the opposite direction, towards the wheelhouse.

“Where is he going?” Y/N yelled over the winds and the thunder that started to crack, crouching out of instinct though she knew it wouldn’t be much protection. Another wave crashed against the vessel, water flooding the deck. The rain fell harder above them, leaving them no mercy. They were being tossed around like a

“Distress signal,” Sunghoon shouted back, holding Jay in place amongst the imbalance.

The storm swallowed the horizon whole, a monstrous force of wind and water that turned the sky into an endless void of grey. The waves surged like biblical monsters, heaving and crashing against the vessel with relentless fury, each impact rattling through steel and bone alike. The world had shrunk to chaos—water seeping into every crevice, bodies thrown against railings, desperate hands gripping whatever they could to keep from being flung into the abyss.

“Sunghoon, we’re not gonna make it,” Y/N could feel her tears, tears of fear and defeat, mixing with the rain, eyes squinting as she searched for him amongst the fog.

“No, Y/N,” Sunghoon yelled. “We’re gonna make it.”

Somewhere, through the deafening roar of the storm, a voice crackled through the radio—a lifeline lost in static—before the darkness was split apart by a piercing beam of light.

The helicopter had arrived.

The harsh fluorescent lights buzzed overhead, a stark contrast to the wild, untamed darkness of the storm they had just survived. The six of them sat scattered around the hospital room, their bodies aching, their minds still reeling from the chaos that had led them here. The sterile scent of antiseptic filled the air, but beneath it lingered the salt of the ocean, a reminder that no matter how far they were from that vessel, the sea was still etched into their skin.

Jay sat in the center of it all, his arm immobilized in a sling, bruises painting his skin in deep purples and sickly yellows. He looked exhausted, but there was a ghost of his usual grin on his face as he tried to downplay the pain. “I guess this means I get out of heavy lifting for a while,” he joked, but no one laughed.

Because they all remembered.

They remembered the way the waves had swallowed the vessel, tossing them like rag dolls. The helplessness of gripping onto whatever they could, praying they wouldn’t be swept away. The panic when Jay had been thrown across the deck, a sickening crack cutting through the chaos. The way he had screamed. The frantic, trembling hands trying to keep pressure on his injury, the desperate voices yelling into the radio for help, the sheer terror that, for a moment, they might not all make it out.

Sunghoon sat at the edge of his hospital bed, staring at the floor with his elbows on his knees, fingers interlocked so tightly his knuckles were white. Jason and Heeseung murmured in hushed tones with a doctor at the doorway, nodding stiffly at whatever instructions were being given.

And then there was Y/N.

She sat beside Jake, her head resting against his shoulder, eyes open but unfocused. Her hands were clasped together in her lap, like she was grounding herself, trying to convince herself that they were safe now. That it was over.

Jake hadn’t let go of her since they had been pulled out of the storm. His grip on her hand was firm, like if he let go, she might disappear. The adrenaline had long worn off, leaving behind only exhaustion and the silent, heavy weight of everything they had endured.

For the first time in months, there was no vessel beneath them, no swaying of the ocean, no distant songs of whales humming through the water. Just the quiet hum of the hospital and the echo of a storm that still raged inside them. For the first time, Y/N wondered, had they all gone crazy without knowing it? She’d seen documentaries about this- how people stranded in a single environment could descend into a state of psychosis. Did that happen to them, sickness right under their noses?

When the doctor made her way towards the group, everyone lifted their heads and sat straight, reacting as though a professor had just walked into the classroom. Dr Ryu looked at them sternly, an absence of sympathy and solemness in her demeanour. Perhaps that is exactly what they needed. “You guys got lucky,” she said. “It could have been worse.”

Everyone responded with a sequence of nods, Jay wincing as he moved the wrong muscle. Jason shifted to his side, resting his hand on his back as support and comfort.

“Physically, you all should be fine. A quick recovery- Jay included,” Dr Ryu continued. “However, I highly recommend visiting a therapist. By the looks of it, this wasn’t something easy that you all had to go through and you now show increased vulnerability to PTSD or any related disorders. Please do take my advice seriously.”

Again, she was met with a sequence of nods and mumbles, assuring her that they would do their best in taking care of themselves and each other.

“We will keep Jay in for the night for observation,” Dr Ryu said. “Any of you can stay with him. The rest of you- go home. Go home to your families and just be in a more familiar space. Try to sleep- staying awake all night and mulling over it will not help. Your bodies are exhausted. Give it a rest and come back tomorrow.”

As she walked away from the group, a moment of silence fell over them as they went over what the doctor had said. PTSD? Who knew this was the turn their lives would take? To be fair, she only advised a therapist- there was no guarantee for anything at the moment.

“I’ll stay,” Jason said. The decision was made without much debate. Friends since a trip went wrong during university, it made sense that he stayed back. While working on a coastal biodiversity project, their boat engine failed during a data collection run, leaving them stranded at sea for hours. They were rescued by helicopters that day, too and looking back, their situation now looked eerily similar- just without the injury and the trauma.

Jason had already straightened in his seat, his expression leaving no room for argument. Jay rolled his eyes but didn’t protest. “You guys should go get some actual sleep. My apartment’s closer to the hospital anyway- you should spend the night there, give each other company.”

No one had the energy to argue.

Sunghoon sighed, rubbing a hand down his face. “I’m gonna pass out the second I hit a bed.”

“Same,” Heeseung muttered, already gathering what little belongings they had brought with them.

Y/N glanced at Jake, who had been uncharacteristically quiet. He still hadn’t let go of her hand, his thumb absentmindedly running over her knuckles. His eyes flickered toward Jason, something unreadable crossing his expression.

Jason caught it. “Don’t even think about staying, Jake,” he said, voice softer now but still firm. “You look worse than Jay.”

Jake huffed a quiet laugh, but Y/N felt the tension in his grip. He didn’t want to leave. None of them really did, but Jason was right- they needed rest, and Jay was in good hands.

Y/N squeezed his hand, a silent reassurance, before standing up. “We’ll be back first thing in the morning.”

Jason gave a small nod. “I’ll text you if anything happens.”

With that, they filed out of the room, exhaustion making their movements sluggish. The police drove them to Jason’s apartment and the second they opened the doors, Heeseung and Sunghoon occupied the guest bedroom and Jake dragged himself into Jason’s bedroom. Y/N found herself frozen in the bathroom, staring at herself in the mirror. She felt like a fool for feeling the way she did, for being naive enough to think that she could get past this like it was a bad birthday party.

Upon entering the room Jake was in, she found him sitting cross legged on the bed, back hunched over as he toyed with something on his phone. When he felt her presence, he kept his phone away and shifted his gaze to her. He patted the empty space beside him, coaxing her to sit with him and she did. She let her head hit the pillow and Jake leaned against the headboard, eyes falling on the ceiling. It was weird not catching sight of a night sky filled with stars- almost unfamiliar.

“I can’t stop thinking about it,” he whispered, almost as if saying it quieter would make their predicament lighter.

“I know,” she responded. “It doesn’t feel real,” she rested her hand against his shoulder, softly rubbing his back in hopes of comforting him. He leaned his cheek against her hand, raising his own to hold hers and closing his eyes to find solace in the moment.

“Everything’s gonna be alright,” he mumbled.

“Everything is alright,” she tried. “We’re all here, alive and safe. Jay is fine.”

“Jay is fine,” he repeated.

“And we are fine.”

“You almost died.”

Y/N leaned up and rested against the headboard with him, deliberately keeping her face close to his, breaths syncing. Jake’s eyes stayed close, his cheek still on her hand. “But I didn’t,” she said, with conviction.

“You were slipping away.”

Y/N didn’t know how to respond. The weight of it sat between them, heavy and unspoken. She knew that feeling. The terror of helplessness. The way it lingered in your bones, no matter how many times you tell yourself you survived.

She shifted, sliding closer, until their knees brushed. “But I’m here,” she murmured.

Jake lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to her palm, and something inside her stirred. “I need to feel it,” he said, almost to himself. “That you’re here. That this is real.”

His hands found her waist, tentative and fragile at first like that night in the sleeping pods, testing the waters, walking on eggshells. When she moved closer to him, finding herself straddling his waist again, Jake found no motive to stop. He leaned upwards to find her lips, mouths colliding without hesitation- there was no adultery, no ploy of teasing or hurting, no uncertainty. They were two people, finding an anchor within each other, desperately holding on.

When he finally kissed her, Y/N wondered why it took so long for them to be in this position in the first place. And he kissed her with caution, slow movements memorising her crevices and making sure she remembered him. As their mouths opened and closed in sync, his hands roamed underneath her shirt, tracing her skin and counting her ribs before lifting her shirt over her head. In that moment, while he held her, she didn’t feel lusted over or sexualised- she felt as though she was being protected, cherished… loved.

“Y/N… I don’t just want you,” he breathed against her, lips moving down her throat and hands roaming her legs. “I need you.”

Slowly, wrapping his arms around her back, he flipped her over so she lay on the bed and he hovered over her. For a brief moment, he stopped to look at her face- her eyes that were filled with curiosity and anticipation, lips parted in waiting for him, hair strewn across the pillow. Then he kissed her again, one hand roaming towards her nippled and the other swiftly unzipping her jeans. In this moment, though he usually wouldn’t prefer to, Jake wasted no time- he didn’t want to tease her or waste his time with foreplay. He just wanted to feel her, know that she was living in his arms, breathing and letting her heart beat against him.

His hand shifted to move her jeans off her legs and Y/N shimmied out of them, chuckling in the process. “This isn’t that attractive,” she murmured.

“Shut up,” he said with a grin and kissed her again.

He let his fingers hook under her underwear and touch her clit. Y/N moaned into his and he moaned back, feeling the wetness of her folds and letting her back arch into him. Her hips grinded against his hand and he complied by exploring her folds, slowly and desperately getting her to whine and moan more under him.

“Heeseung and Sunghoon are sleeping,” Jake mumbled against her skin, lips exploring the nape of her neck and moving to the curve of your breasts. “You’ve gotta try to be quiet, yeah?”

“Okay,” she heaved and Jake could feel her nod, her chin touching his hair.

He slipped a finger into her hole and she squirmed, biting her lip to adjust to the length. Her hands flew towards his hair, tugging and pulling at the silky tufts. He moved his finger in and out, languidly and deliberately, eyeing your reactions and expressions as he did so. His thumb flew to her clip, rubbing steady circles only for more wetness to ooze out of her.

“Higher, Jake,” he heard her moan and he increased his pace. The sound of squelching filled the room, mixed with their moans. He kissed her again, his other hand continuing to toy with her nipples while he fingered her- now, fast and dirty, aiming towards a goal. He could feel her clenching on his fingers, clamping down everytime he pulled out too much, whimpering every time he curled at the right spot.

Jake moved so he could kneel between her legs, his fingers now moving slower as he brought his face closer to her heat. She could feel his breath on her, only making her ache for him more. She whined for him to hurry up and was only shut up when she felt his mouth on her. He sucked on her clit as his finger picked up pacing, adding a second one as her breath got heavier. He could see her chest heaving, her hands flying upwards to grip the headboard.

When her knees started closing instinctively, his shoulders kept them apart, one hand gripping her hip so tight she was sure she’d have bruises the next morning. And he kept going, sucking and flicking at her clit with his tongue, fingers moving in and out of her so fast that she’d forgotten how she ended up here in the first place.

“I’m so close,” she moaned. “So close.”

And just as she felt her high crashing down on her, he’d withdrawn himself completely and she let out a gasp. Her brows furrowed, she tilted her head to find Jake stripping his own clothes and she stared at the way his chest glistened under the moonlight, his dick springing out of his boxers as he moved to hover over her again. His hair fell onto his forehead and her hands moved to tuck it under his ear. She placed an innocent peck on nose, cheeks, forehead and chin before moving to his lips again, waiting for him to do something before getting annoyed at her lack of orgasm.

“Brace yourself, alright?” He whispered into her mouth and she felt his tip aligning to her entrance. He looked at her before going any further, waiting for a confirmation. When she nodded, he pushed himself into her and the pair moaned in unison.

“Is this the great sex you were referring to?”

“You can’t deny it.”

As he thrusted into her, sharp and with purpose, she regretted wanting to tease him or get a laugh out of him. She let out a gasp, followed by an incoherent string of moans as he thrusted in and out of her, his hand caressing the back of her head and her nails scratching his back. She wrapped her legs around his waist, a desperate way to feel him deeper inside her. He buried himself in the nape of her neck, peppering kisses behind her ear while she did the same to his shoulder.

“Faster,” she moaned and he complied, forgetting the slow and romantic pace he wanted to go with and pounding into her faster, harder- anything and everything to get her to cum with him. He let a hand slip in between their bodies, fingers finding her clit and rubbing briskly and whispering sweet lulls into her ears.

“You gotta cum with me, yeah?” He said and she could only nod, throat too preoccupied with the moans she couldn’t hold back.

She felt the knot in her stomach building again, back arching further and pussy clenching harder onto is dick- he could feel it too, that she was close. She threw her head back, waiting for the moment to fall upon her, waiting for him to say something. He only went faster, letting the hinges of the bed creek.

“Y/N?” She responded with a frustrated hum. “Cum with me- cum for me.”

And she did, letting her orgasm spill over her body and she could feel him inside her, filling her up to the brim. Jake moaned, feeling her body shudder at the way he fucked her, her eyes meeting his with desperation and ache.

“Jake…” she whined as he placed her body comfortably on the mattress again, falling on the empty space beside her and wrapping his arms around her torso. “So good,” she breathed, unable to unclutter her thoughts.

“I know that was supposed to be depression sex, but wow,” he said into her neck.

Y/N raised a lazy hand to hit him on the head. “Stop being funny,” she groaned and he laughed.

Jake, Y/N, Jason, Heeseung, Jay and Sunghoon stood in a line in front of Henry Sim. Over the past few weeks, they’d met with him a plethora of times- just to talk, not even about technical things, just talk. It was his way of looking out for them, taking care of them in whatever way he could. He offered to buy them meals, pay their therapy and hospital bills and even offered them a stipend if they needed it- all out of guilt and desperation to help them heal better, not knowing what else to do.

He was never critical, even praising their work to a large extent. And in all honesty, he was proud- it was great work. “This information that you all have gathered is valuable, I hope you know that,” he said to them, holding their report in hand.

“Yes, sir,” they answered in unison.

“It still feels unreal. Like we’re supposed to wake up tomorrow and check the equipment again,” Sunghoon said.

Jay chuckled, adjusting the sling on his arm. "Speak for yourself. I’d rather not get thrown around another boat for a while."

Heeseung smirked. "You’re just mad the whale was stronger than you."

Sunghoon, who had been absentmindedly fidgeting with the strap of his camera bag, let out a small laugh, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. The energy in the room had shifted, nostalgia seeping in through the cracks.

Henry exhaled through his nose. "The ocean doesn’t let anyone walk away the same. You six will carry this experience with you—whether you realize it now or not."

Jake, who had been quiet until then, glanced at Y/N. She met his gaze, and for a moment, the past months condensed into something unspoken but understood. The storm. The breach. The long nights and quiet moments. The feeling of something beginning even as something else ended.

Noticing their interaction, Henry cleared his throat. “The least I was expecting was the pairing of these two,” he pointed between Jake and Y/N. The rest of the group cackled.

“They thought they were being so slick,” Heeseung laughed. “We noticed everything.”

Rolling their eyes, Jake and Y/N continued to grin at everyone's smiling faces. The aquarium lights flickered slightly as a school of fish glided past the large tank beside them. It was a strange, almost poetic parallel—them, sitting still in this room, while life outside moved on without waiting.

Jason grimaced at the idea of his brother and best friend dating. Attempting to change the conversation, he cleared his throat. “So what now?”

The question hung heavy in the air as the group of six looked at each other. They knew what was to come- a set of interviews, press releases of what they experienced and perhaps even a short YouTube documentary. But what was to happen to their lives? What were they to expect?

No one wanted to answer that question. All they knew was that outside, the ocean awaited their return.

[le-monchou]

Ok, you can totally ignore this if you want to but I just love how you write Leona.

So......

Leona with an anarchist reader/Yuu. They simply don't like nor understand the reason for a hierarchy and don't believe that one person should be in charge of a whole kingdom, be it a hereditary "god given right" or not.

That's all, take care and drink water

okay while this was in my drafts, i think anon took the idea to another fic writer... hm. normally i'd be offended by the ask was from january so nvm lol i hope you like it anon. the other one is by @twstfanblog over here. || 405 words

leona exhales through his nose, his finger idly scratching the page of the novel he was reading as he watches you pace the floor of his room. "i'm just saying," you start, hands thrown up in the air, "if people actually worked together instead of relying on one person to make all the decisions, we wouldn’t have to deal with kings who think they’re untouchable."

leona arches a brow, unimpressed with your statement. "and what do you think happens when those same people turn on each other? you think everyone's gonna sit in a circle, hold hands, and make nice decisions together? The second there’s a power vacuum, someone’s gonna fill it, and it's usually the worst possible person."

"not if the structure prevents that."

leona clicks his tongue, placing a bookmark snuggly between the pages before shutting his novel. "not the point. the structure you're talkin' about is ideal, sure. works really well within small groups, the largest one being about 500. no nation in the world has a population of 500 or less- so there's too many moving parts, too many people to control, and too many idiots who can’t think for themselves."

"people aren't as dumb as you think they are, leona." you frown.

"they aren't. but let's say we go to the sunset savannah right now. in the royal palace, would you or would you not be content to let me lead you and give you directives? dress this way, talk like that, don't mention this, blah, blah, blah."

"i.... guess?"

"that's what goes through in everyone's minds. the less knowledge you have, the less control you have. a good leader isn’t just some throne warmer or a puppet, though those situations have occured in the past. they keep the vultures from tearing everything apart. without one, you’d be left with conmen and opportunists running circles around everyone else, no matter how smart they may think themselves."

"so despite everything" you frown. "you think the monarchy is a good thing."

leona grimaces. "no, i don't, you creature who sees things in black n' white. the answer's simple- it's better to have one lion at the top than a thousand rats fighting over scraps."

"wha-"

"these situations are nuanced and complex. it's easy to implement an anarchical society within a certain limit, but society, and your family, will eventually evolve a hierarchy. now the question should be... how does one fight that?"

[chrisstvrns]

blurb of chris loving his girl so much, he would do anything for her forgiveness.

warnings: light angst, fluff in the end

word count: 876

chris knew he had fucked up.  

and not in the way where he could flash that lopsided grin, mumble out some half-assed "my bad," and wrap his arms around you until you begrudgingly accepted his apology. no, this was the kind of fuck-up that left his phone void of your name, your texts, your voice. it had been three days. three days of silence, three days of you ignoring his texts, leaving his calls to ring out, and worst of all, three days since you had stormed out of his house with fire in your eyes and venom in your words.  

matt and nick had given him shit for it. repeatedly. but chris didn’t care about their ribbing—he cared that he hadn't been able to fix it yet.  

so, in an act of desperation, he did something he never thought he'd do: he sat down with an actual pen and paper and wrote you a letter. no texting, no notes app draft, no voice memo where he rambled until he hoped he made sense. just ink and regret spilled onto three long pages.  

chris folded the letter, sealed it in an envelope, and, with a determined heart, drove over to your place. he carefully placed the letter into your mailbox, texted a simple “i left something for you,” and prayed you’d read it.  

you did.  

and not only did you read it, but you also grabbed a red pen and went absolutely feral on it.  

when chris found the same envelope in his mailbox the next morning, his heart leapt in hope—until he pulled out the letter and saw your handwriting scribbled all over it, ruthlessly correcting his grammar, circling misspelled words, and writing snarky little comments in the margins.  

“you don’t blame me? then why did you fight me on it?”  

“you should’ve listened to me? damn right. make this a thesis statement instead of burying the lead.”  

“good, this part actually sounds like you mean it. keep going.”  

and the kicker, written at the very bottom in bold, underlined letters:  

“if you can rewrite this and turn it in by tomorrow, i’ll unblock you.”  

chris stared at the letter, torn between laughing and groaning in frustration. only you would take his heartfelt apology and turn it into a goddamn english assignment.  

he grinned.  

challenge accepted.  

chris spent the rest of the day hunched over his desk, muttering to himself as he scribbled out a new draft. he had never put so much effort into writing anything in his life, not even the one essay he actually cared about in high school. he read and reread your comments, taking them seriously, and making sure that this time, every word counted.  

he started over twice. the first draft felt too stiff, too formal - like he was writing a resignation letter instead of an apology. the second had too much rambling, and you’d already told him not to bury the lead. so, for the third attempt, he took a deep breath and wrote like he was talking to you. like you were right in front of him, arms crossed, waiting for him to say something real.  

by the time he finished, his hand was cramping, his desk was covered in discarded drafts, and the clock read 2:14 am. but for the first time in three days, he felt like he had a shot at fixing things.  

chris sealed the new letter in an envelope, drove to your place, and left it in your mailbox, yet again. this time, he didn’t text you - just knocked once and walked away, leaving it in your hands.  

the next morning, his phone buzzed.  

a text from you.  

chris’s heart jumped as he unlocked his phone and read the text.  

“you passed. barely. but i’ll allow it.”  

before he could even think of a reply, another message popped up.  

“come over.”   

chris didn’t waste time. he was out the door in minutes, barely remembering to grab his keys. the drive to your place felt longer than ever, anticipation and nerves tangling in his chest.  

when you opened the door, he barely had a second to register the look on your face before you were pulling him inside, your arms crossing over your chest like you were still debating whether or not to be mad at him.  

“well?” you prompted.  

chris ran a hand through his hair, letting out a breath. “i meant every word.”  

you eyed him for a moment before unfolding the letter and holding it up. “this was good,” you admitted, tapping the paper. “and better yet, you actually listened.”  

his lips twitched. “had to. i was being graded.”  

your glare was half-hearted at best. “i don’t think you understand how close you were to failing.”  

chris grinned. “guess that makes this an extra credit assignment,” he said, closing the space between you.  

you rolled your eyes, but when he hesitated, waiting for permission, your expression softened. finally, you sighed, tilting your head up just enough to meet him halfway.  

“i hate that you’re kinda good at this,” you muttered.  

chris smirked. “oh, i’m great at this.”  

and when his arms wrapped around you, pulling you in, you didn’t pull away.

────────────୨ৎ────────────

a/n: this was made based off of this post by @muwapsturniolo !! finally out of my writers slump (???) i kinda hate this sooo ?

- aurora ᯓ✮⋆˙

likes and reblogs are always greatly appreciated! ੈ✩‧₊˚

to be added to my taglist, comment on this post!

[michimars-room]

Confessions & Love Languages

with the Sinostra Ghouls 🎰🤑

so uhhh... it feels illegal if i don't tag Auburn if im posting about Ritsu... so @cloudcountry ♡ here's more sweet ritsu thoughts!!

Taiga’s…

love languages ♡ quality time, physical touch

✵ So, you're gonna have to REALLY spend a lot of time to stay relevant in his mind, or else he's not going to remember you, silly! You will need to confess first. It's terrifying in general to open your heart, but when it comes to someone as unpredictable and unhinged as Taiga? Of course, you're extremely nervous. He will laugh and tease you, pointing out how fidgety you are… but after you tell him, his whole demeanor changes. He pulls you onto his lap and squeezes you tightly, his breath fanning on your neck. Your presence grounds him and is soothing for him, especially when you glide your hands through his hair, nails gently scratching his scalp. He wants to keep his kitty cat close and safe! He gets upset when you leave his side too long >:(

✵ To him, any time spent together is quality time - whether that's curling up and falling asleep together, sitting in the casino at a table with him. Craves your comfort and touch, that man would kill (genuinely) for his kittycat. Everyone will be extra nice, NOBODY wants to get on Taiga's bad side - ESPECIALLY when it comes to you.

Romeo’s...

love languages ♡ acts of service & gift giving

✵ God, if you chase after him, it would feed this man’s ego if you confess first. If you don’t he will literally go insane. But on the flip side, he’s already going insane seeing you spending time with the other ghouls (whether you have to for missions or just hanging out). Prepare for him to become extra mean… Which in turn, only makes it easier to keep away since he seems to be in a pissy mood when he IS around you. You’re gonna have to be able to stand your ground in this relationship, god willing… I hope you’re good at reading between the lines & his biting words <3. Either way, you are going to be forced to confess first - on your own accord or wait for his mind to break from jealousy. Him calling you repeatedly, texting you over & over again, “come here, I need your help with something.” As so, you go, begrudgingly… you’ve fallen in love with someone who can be so insufferable all because he refuses to acknowledge he has feelings for you. He needs to hear you say it, though. One particular comment on how you are so stupid for not being able to do something makes you snap back, gathering yourself before going to walk out the door. shit he really fucked that up, didn’t he. tugs on your hand lightly, voice softening mumbling out a rushed apology, “I’m sorry please don't go.” so quiet you almost missed it. His facade breaking, showing you his true self made you pause, “You’re lucky I love you…” You muttered, extremely annoyed but he didn’t dwell on that part. Of COURSE you love him, it only made sense! You have wonderful taste 🙂‍↕️. Now his ego is inflated, aware you feel the same… he’s not letting you get away.

✵ He expects mutual pampering, absolutely ADORES going on shopping trips, and buys you the most luxurious, expensive clothes, jewelry, shoes, makeup, skincare, perfume - the list goes on. He’ll show you off on his arm, but god forbid someone, look at you a second longer than he deemed acceptable. If looks could kill… he would have multiple life sentences. Expects you to give massages and vice versa. (He’s actually sooo good at giving massages).

Ritsu’s...

love languages ♡ quality time, acts of service

✵ He will get the hints, but wants you to be clear. Not one for flings, he wants to be with someone who he can see himself with long term! He tries to keep his work & personal life separate, but it's hard when his partner is just so cute. He starts showing appreciation for the little things you do to help him out, and that snowballed into him returning the favor - mostly not during office hours. Him spending his free time with you is a confession in itself. Although he does get flustered when he realizes his feelings, he doesn’t hesitate to voice them actually! Clarifies that he has romantic feelings and is attracted to you - this is to prevent the relationship's lines from becoming blurred and also so you don't feel uncomfortable by the palpable shift in energy between you both…. He's direct with you, leaves you with no room to think otherwise.

✵ After work hours? Oh, he is glued to you ready and willing to do all the couple/romantic things you have in mind (that you've suppressed during working hours…) He will also take the initiative and plan dates outside of working hours - secretly reads romance novels and articles (he's researching shut up) to get date ideas and to keep things in the relationship exciting and interesting, which is VERY important when considering long term relationships.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖ .

[notiddygothgf]

ix

★ pairings: aki hayakawa x fem reader

★ ❝ God, you're messing with my fucking head. ❞

★ c.w.: drunk reader (yikes)

★ a/n: so im lowkey not confident that i did good on that chem exam but shit a promise is a promise.... HERE SHE IS!!!! another update!! and this one??? phew... strap in children, it's a RIDE. i'm not gonna say too much bc im just so excited for you all to read this. I've been bouncing up and down trying not to spoil this one for anyone so pLEAAAAASEEEE!! keep on commenting, liking, supporting, inboxing. I love the community I've built on wattpad and tumblr for this fanfic. I'm so glad you al love it as much as I do!

★ w.c: 9k

pornstar ; chapter index

SOMEWHERE AROUND 2, you sauntered right into Public Safety’s Tokyo HQ feeling your very best. Today was your scutwork day, meaning that you would be spending the day indoors doing whatever work the higher-ups asked of you and, already, you were turning heads.

“Looking good, Kohai,” One of your coworkers whistled at you, a tiny girl by the name of Kawakami who you spoke to frequently in passing.

You smiled at her warmly, letting yourself revel in the compliment. Today, you felt your best because you were wearing your best – A form-fitting white button down top and a pencil skirt that stopped around mid-though. Your hair was done back, and you had touched your face up with some subtle makeup. A little mascara here, to make your eyes pop, and a little red lipstick there. You weren’t stupid. You knew that the skirt did nothing to hide the curves of your ass, the slope of your hips. Actually, that was the entire point.

On a mission day or a patrol day, you knew the outfit wouldn’t have flown. Today was different. Today, you were only doing paperwork.

Paperwork for one man in particular.

You knocked at the door, knuckles rapping against the wooden surface. A moment passed before you heard that cold, impassive voice responding, “Come in.”

Clutching a stack of paperwork Makima had handed you to give to him, you opened the door with your shoulder. There Aki was, dressed in that uniform that hugged his perfect body so well, broody blue eyes trained on a paper packet. When he heard you enter, he looked up at you through his lashes, not fully glancing up from the paperwork – telephone pressed to his ear.

He was so pretty, it hurt.

You smiled at him (kill them with kindness, you figured), making sure to swing your hips a little more as you approached his desk. Then, gently – oh-so gently – you leaned down and set the paperwork onto his desk.

He peered up at you, then, at your done-up face. His gaze seemed to shamelessly roam over your body, the outfit you had specifically picked out with him in mind. For a moment, you could have sworn you saw something in his gaze shift, the slightest dilation of his pupils as they lingered on your legs. 

You couldn’t help but bask in the feeling – the feeling of having his attention on you.

“Excuse me for just a second,” He muttered into the phone. Holding his hand up to cover the receiver, he opened his mouth to speak, and for a moment, a part of you hoped that he would say something about your outfit – tell you to change, tell you anything, “Could you grab me a coffee from the breakroom?”

Oh, you thought. Okay, then.

Pursing your lips, you nodded, bowing slightly as you did so, “Of course.”

As you left Aki’s office, you let out a slow, steady breath, forcing yourself to keep your composure. His gaze—the weight of it lingering on your body—had sent a little thrill through your veins. It was almost pathetic how much you basked in it, how much you ached for the smallest hint of attention from him. Even just the way his eyes had dragged down your legs, the way his pupils had slightly dilated when he caught sight of your lipstick-painted lips, made something coil tight in your chest.

But now wasn’t the time to get lost in the fantasy—you had a task to complete.

The breakroom was empty when you entered, save for the low hum of the refrigerator. You moved toward the coffee machine, grabbing one of the paper cups from the stack and pressing the button to let the dark liquid pour in. The scent of bitter coffee filled the air as you leaned back against the counter, waiting for the cup to fill.

Your reflection in the metal cabinet doors caught your attention. The slight smudge of red at the corner of your lips made you frown. You had spent extra time on your makeup today for a reason—if you were going to play this game, every detail had to be just right.

You reached into your pocket, fingers curling around the smooth, gold casing of your lipstick. Twisting it open, you brought the deep red shade to your lips, carefully gliding it over your mouth. One coat, then another. Just enough to make your lips look fuller, more inviting. You pressed them together, ensuring the color settled perfectly before giving yourself one last glance in the reflection.

Satisfied, you picked up the coffee and left the breakroom.

This time, you didn’t bother knocking. You pushed the door open with your shoulder, stepping inside without hesitation. Aki was exactly where you had left him, hunched over paperwork, his focus unwavering. The warm glow of the desk lamp highlighted the sharp angles of his face—his strong jaw, the shadows beneath his cheekbones, the furrow in his brow as he concentrated.

But the second you approached, his eyes flickered up to meet yours.

Wordlessly, you bent over to set the coffee down on his desk, taking your time, ensuring your posture emphasized the curve of your body. The hem of your pencil skirt rode up just slightly, and you knew—knew—he was watching.

His gaze was on you before you even looked up. And when you finally did, there was something unreadable in his expression. Cool, composed, but something else too.

A hunger.

This tension’s gonna make me go fucking crazy.

You straightened up, smoothing the fabric of your skirt with the palm of your hand. Then, with the sweetest voice you could muster, you asked, “Do you need anything else, sir?”

It was subtle, the shift in his demeanor—but you caught it.

The faintest tension in his jaw. The way his fingers stilled against the paper. His pupils darkening just a shade.

A pause.

“I actually do have some letters I need to write,” he said at last, voice steady but slightly lower than before. “Do you have a minute?”

You nodded, tilting your head slightly, watching him.

He let out a breath, setting his pen down against the desk. “I’m so backed up on paperwork that I don’t think I’ll have the time. I need to write Kenji’s letter of termination.”

Something in your stomach twisted.

“I have a few points written here,” he added, reaching for a small post-it note. “I just need it formatted into something official.”

As he handed it to you, his fingers brushed against yours—just barely, just for a second—but the touch sent a strange shiver down your spine. You peered down at the little paper square, realizing rather suddenly that you had never seen his handwriting before. It was neat, perfect cursive – totally indicative of his personality.

“Do you think you could write up a draft for me?”

You barely heard him. Your mind had already spiraled somewhere else.

Kenji.

The memory hit you in pieces.

The way the world had blurred around the edges that night, your limbs feeling too heavy, too slow. Kenji’s hands—unwanted and rough—pressing against you. The sickening scent of alcohol on his breath as he backed you up against the wall, murmuring filth into your ear.

Your own voice, weak and slurred, as you tried to tell him to stop.

The helplessness.

The burning shame.

And now, standing here, looking at the post-it note with Kenji’s name scribbled on it, you felt something close to satisfaction coil in your chest.

You smiled, slow and sweet. “Of course.”

Taking the note from him, you slid it into the pocket of your skirt, feeling its weight settle against your hip.

“I’ll have it done by the end of the night,” you assured him.

Aki nodded once, already turning back to his work. If he noticed the slight shift in your expression—the way your smile didn’t quite reach your eyes—he didn’t say anything.

You turned on your heel and walked out, your heartbeat steady, your mind sharp.

You hoped this wouldn’t keep you too late. Himeno had invited you out for drinks tonight, and right about now, you wanted any excuse to get shitfaced that you could get.

Public Safety Bureau – Tokyo HeadquartersMarch 18, 2025Public Safety Devil Hunter, Division [4] Public Safety Bureau – Tokyo Headquarters

Subject: Notice of Termination of Employment

Dear Mr. Aragawa,

After a thorough review of your conduct and performance within the Public Safety Bureau, it has been determined that your employment with this organization is hereby terminated, effective immediately.

This decision has been made on the basis of multiple violations of Bureau policies, including but not limited to:

Insubordination: You have repeatedly failed to comply with direct orders from superior officers, demonstrating a blatant disregard for protocol and chain of command. This behavior has not only hindered operations but has also created unnecessary risks for your colleagues and the organization as a whole.

Assaulting a Coworker: It has been brought to our attention that you engaged in inappropriate and aggressive behavior toward a fellow Bureau employee. A formal investigation into this incident has confirmed that your actions constituted a violation of workplace safety policies, as well as ethical and legal standards upheld by this organization. Such behavior is entirely unacceptable and will not be tolerated within Public Safety.

Given the severity of these infractions, your immediate dismissal has been deemed necessary to uphold the integrity, discipline, and safety of the Bureau and its personnel.

You are required to return all Bureau-issued equipment and credentials to the administrative office by the end of the day. Any outstanding documentation or administrative matters related to your employment will be handled accordingly.

Should you have any questions regarding this decision or require clarification on final procedures, you may contact the Human Resources department.

Sincerely,

Aki HayakawaLieutenant Captain 

Public Safety Bureau – Tokyo Headquarters

At the end of the day, you returned to Aki’s office, the weight of the termination letter settled in your hands. The fluorescent lights buzzed softly above, casting a faint glow over the dimly lit office. His desk was as cluttered as ever—papers stacked in uneven piles, a half-empty coffee cup pushed to the side, the faint trace of his cologne lingering in the air.

You ran your fingers along the edge of the document as you approached, eyeing the blank space you’d left for his signature. The words printed on the page felt heavier now, more significant. You weren’t just turning in paperwork. You were handing him something final, something that would erase Kenji from Public Safety for good.

Aki barely looked up as you set the letter on his desk.

“It’s done,” you said, keeping your voice light.

He gave a slow nod, flipping the pages between his fingers, scanning the contents with careful precision. You lingered, watching his expression shift slightly—his brow furrowing, his lips pressing into a thin line. He was always so controlled, so unreadable, but you’d spent enough time around him to know when something was picking at him.

You turned on your heel, ready to leave. But then—

The sound of voice calling your name stopped you in your tracks.

You turned back toward him, feigning innocence. “Yes, sir?”

Aki set the letter down, exhaling through his nose. His fingers tapped once against the desk before he leaned back in his chair, leveling you with a look that was both sharp and exasperated.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

You blinked. “What?”

“You know what.” He sighed, dragging a hand through his dark hair. “I’m at least ninety percent sure you’re violating some sort of dress code.”

A slow, amused smile curled at the corner of your lips. “I’m not. My outfit and makeup are in compliance with company policy,” you answered smoothly. “Does it bother you?”

He didn’t answer right away, but the muscle in his jaw tensed.

“That skirt is a bit short, don’t you think?” he muttered.

Gotcha.

You tilted your head, regarding him carefully. His voice was calm, controlled, but there was something else beneath it—something tight, something restrained.

“Are you… staring?” you asked, deliberately teasing, eyes glinting with something dangerous.

His brows pinched together in irritation. “I’m more concerned about other people.”

Is he… jealous?

He took the bait.

A flicker of satisfaction danced through you as he continued, his voice lower now, more serious. “You of all people should know there are some dogs in Public Safety. Men who wouldn’t hesitate to take advantage of you.”

Oh, he definitely is.

You hummed thoughtfully, stepping just a little closer, your heels clicking softly against the floor. “Like you, sir?”

Aki scoffed, rubbing his temple as if you were giving him a headache. “For the love of—” He cut himself off, sighing sharply. “I’m not taking advantage of you. I’m–”

“Protecting me, right. I got that,” you said airily. Then, tilting your head, you added, “I think we both know that’s a bullshit excuse.”

His eyes darkened—not with anger, but with something deeper, something unreadable. He stared at you, unmoving, his fingers still curled slightly on the desk, the weight of his silence settling between you.

You were out of line.

“Don’t start,” he muttered.

“Start what?”

Aki exhaled, his patience thinning. “We’re not having this conversation again.”

You watched as he reached for the letter, his eyes flickering over the words you had carefully typed. His expression remained unreadable as he skimmed it, though you didn’t miss the way his fingers flexed slightly when he reached Kenji’s name. A beat of silence stretched between you.

“Thank you for the letter,” he said at last, his tone clipped, controlled. “You’re dismissed.”

You didn’t argue. You simply gave him a slow, knowing smile, turned on your heel, and–

The sound of his voice made you turn back. 

“Oh, and one more thing,” He spoke – tone firm and commanding, just the way you liked it. When you faced him, he paused, eyes dropping once more to your legs for the briefest of seconds before flitting up to meet your gaze head on. “Don’t wear that skirt to work again.”

You paused, partially shocked that he had been so bold. Then, nodding curtly, you bowed your head, “Of course, sir. It won’t happen again.”

You walked out. And though he tried to pretend otherwise, you felt the weight of his gaze following you all the way to the door.

Still, a little snag of pride curled in your chest because Himeno had been right.

He was jealous.

Later that night, at the izakaya, you were drunk off your ass. This seemed to be a reoccurring theme – something unique to any outing where Himeno was in attendance. She was a bad influence on you, that much was undeniable. Something else was undeniable, too. Namely, the fact that – while she conversed avidly with her partner, Aki, practically leaning on him as she did so – you could do nothing but furrow your brows, pout your lips at her like an insolent child because you couldn’t help but wish that he was giving you his attention instead.

It was a childish whim, you knew. He was an attractive man. He was bound to grab the attention of his female coworkers. Still, you couldn’t help the feeling that bubbled up in your chest, eyes narrowing into slits while you watched them talk. It was something deep, something wrong.

Maybe this is his way of getting back at me, You thought, but you knew that wasn’t the truth. Aki Hayakawa was not a petty person. He would never resort to the same underhanded tactics you had used on him.

Ever the bigger person.

You exhaled, tipping back the last of your drink, the alcohol burning pleasantly down your throat. It did little to wash away the bitter taste on your tongue, the one that had been lingering ever since you sat down at this table and realized you’d made a terrible mistake.

Himeno was draped over Aki, laughing, touching, leaning into him like it was the most natural thing in the world. And the worst part was that he let her. Not in a way that suggested he wanted it—not quite—but in a way that suggested he was used to it. That this was normal for them.

And maybe it was. Maybe this was just what they did. Maybe you were reading too much into it, letting the alcohol meddle with your thoughts, making everything feel sharper and hazier all at once.

But it didn’t matter.

Because the ugly little thing twisting in your chest wasn’t rational. It wasn’t kind or understanding or patient. It was selfish and petty and burning with something you didn’t want to name.

Jealousy.

The very same jealousy you had mocked him for earlier that day.

Aki hadn’t liked the idea of other men looking at you, but at least he’d said something about it. You’d seen the way his eyes darkened, the way his lips pressed into a thin line, the way he practically scolded you for your outfit—an excuse, you were sure, to hide whatever it was he’d really wanted to say.

But now?

Now, you were the one watching him, waiting, hoping for even a flicker of irritation, a sign that he was just as affected by you as you were by him.

And yet, he hadn’t even looked at you once.

It was infuriating.

Maybe you just weren’t being obvious enough.

You turned, shifting your attention to the man beside you—a coworker whose name you couldn’t even remember. He had been sitting quietly, nursing his drink, but that changed the second you leaned into him.

“Hey,” you said, voice sweet, almost lazy.

He blinked, taken aback, before offering a slow grin. “Hey yourself.”

You let out a small, breathy laugh, tilting your head, letting your fingers graze over his sleeve. “I don’t think I caught your name.”

He smirked, pleased by your sudden attention, and opened his mouth to respond—

But you weren’t really listening.

Your focus had already flickered away, drifting toward the only person in the room whose reaction actually mattered.

And—finally—Aki was looking.

Sort of.

His gaze had shifted toward you, lingering on the scene unfolding at the edge of his vision. But that was all it was—an acknowledgment. A passing glance. His brows furrowed slightly, but only for a second, like he was barely bothered by what he was seeing. Then, just as quickly, he turned away, lifting his glass to his lips with maddening indifference.

That was it.

That was all you got.

And it wasn’t enough.

You wanted more.

You wanted him to react—to frown, to scowl, to say something, anything. You wanted him to shift uncomfortably in his seat, to tighten his grip on his drink, to mutter something under his breath about how you were being ridiculous. You wanted him to feel the same frustration you had been choking on all night.

But he didn’t.

Aki remained calm, collected, utterly unreadable, and the realization made something bitter settle in your throat.

The alcohol was making you reckless, but not reckless enough to ignore how utterly disappointing this was.

You let out a slow, measured exhale, fingers tightening around the glass in your hand. The man beside you was still talking, still smiling, completely unaware that your attention had long since drifted elsewhere.

And you couldn’t bring yourself to care.

Maybe this was stupid.

Maybe you were being stupid.

You were drunk. You knew that. You knew that the swirling mess of emotions in your head—frustration, jealousy, need—was amplified by the alcohol. You knew that tomorrow, when the hangover settled in and the memories came flooding back, you’d probably feel embarrassed about all of this.

And yet—

You still weren’t ready to let it go.

So you pushed further.

You leaned in just a little closer, your arm grazing against the man beside you. His cologne was faint but clung to the air—a mix of cheap and familiar. He didn’t seem to mind that you didn’t pull away, his grin widening as you lingered.

“So,” he said, swirling the last of his drink in his glass, “You from around here?”

You hummed, tilting your head as though you were thinking over the answer, though the truth was that it didn’t matter what you said. You already knew exactly what you would tell him. It wasn’t about him. You’d known that from the start.

“We work in the same department,” you replied, teasing lilt in your voice. “Of course I am. You?”

He chuckled, shifting slightly, leaning in a little. “Same. Though I guess that’s obvious, huh? You ever wonder how many of us there are? Feels like I’m always running into new faces.”

The conversation was easy. Too easy. And yet, you weren’t truly engaged with it.

You weren’t really listening to him.

Instead, your attention was fixed on something—or, more accurately, someone—across the table.

Aki sat there, an ocean of composure in the sea of chaos. Himeno spoke animatedly, her voice carrying a lightness you weren’t sure was entirely genuine. Her hand rested casually on his arm, her body language telling the world just how close they were. Aki nodded here and there, responding in short, deliberate sentences. But his eyes, his gaze, stayed mostly on his drink. He was always so careful. Always so deliberate.

Too deliberate.

You could feel the flicker of something in your chest—something hot, something sharp, something you couldn’t quite name. Your eyes narrowed, just a touch, though you kept the smile on your face, turning your attention back to the man beside you.

His voice was too loud, too eager, trying to fill the empty space. “So, you been with Public Safety long?”

“Couple of weeks now,” he said, shifting closer as though to make sure his proximity was noticed. “You?”

You nodded, but didn’t answer right away. Your fingers slid absently over the rim of your empty glass. “Long enough.”

His smile widened, like he thought he was winning some unspoken game. “Long enough for what?”

“To realize the job’s a nightmare.” You grinned at him, playful but cynical.

He laughed, a short chuckle that was surprisingly genuine. “That’s the truth.”

You hummed, allowing him to believe it was an engaging conversation. In truth, it wasn’t. It was nothing more than a distraction. Because your attention was elsewhere, on Aki, on the way his posture never shifted, even as Himeno leaned in closer, whispering something in his ear.

Another glance. Aki’s eyes flicked briefly over to you. Just a moment. Just enough to notice.

You felt a subtle flicker in your chest, something light, almost like anticipation. But you forced yourself to smile and turn back to your companion.

“So tell me,” you said, keeping the air of intrigue in your voice, “what made you join Public Safety?”

He sighed, leaning in slightly, his posture casual, like he was finally getting comfortable. “That’s a long story. You sure you wanna hear it?”

You tilted your head, feigning genuine interest. “Absolutely.”

His voice dropped lower, the words coming more slowly now, like he thought this would be the part where he finally had you hooked. You smiled faintly, but your attention wasn’t on him. It wasn’t on anything he was saying.

Across the table, Aki glanced at you again.

This time, it wasn’t subtle. His eyes lingered longer than the brief flicker from before. He didn’t say anything, didn’t react outwardly. He just looked. And you, ever the observer, couldn’t help but notice.

That was all. Nothing else.

You couldn’t decide whether it was enough or not. Maybe it wasn’t. Maybe you were just too drunk to care about the subtleties anymore. Maybe you wanted more than just a glance. Maybe you wanted something real. Something tangible.

But instead, you just returned to the conversation, nodding in all the right places. Your fingers traced the edge of your glass absentmindedly.

“—and that’s when I realized,” your coworker continued, “I might as well get paid to fight devils if I’m gonna be doing it anyway, right?”

You laughed, keeping your voice light, your eyes flicking to the side once again. Aki was still watching, still observing, but he didn’t say a word.

The silence in his gaze was louder than any words could have been.

You exhaled softly, almost wistfully, as if you were letting go of something, though you weren’t entirely sure what that was.

Another glance, but this time, there was something more to it. Aki’s expression hadn’t changed, but there was something in the way his gaze softened just a fraction, like he was finally, maybe, letting his guard down just the tiniest bit.

But was that even real?

You weren’t sure anymore.

Your fingers tapped against the table, absentmindedly now, your irritation bubbling just beneath the surface.

This wasn’t how you wanted things to go.

You wanted more. You wanted Aki to act like you were the one who mattered. But he didn’t. And the longer you played this game, the more it felt like you were just losing. Losing in ways you couldn’t quite explain.

You didn’t know when it happened—when the conversation with your coworker became a blur of empty words—but you found yourself restless, uncomfortable in a way you couldn’t shake. The alcohol wasn’t helping anymore. It wasn’t softening the edges of your frustration.

You looked over at Aki one last time.

He wasn’t looking at you anymore.

Instead, he was focused on his drink, his face unreadable.

That was it. You were done.

You exhaled, slow and heavy, then stood up abruptly. The movement was sharp, too quick, as if you were trying to shake off the weight that had settled on your chest.

“Excuse me,” you muttered, keeping your tone neutral, though it was nothing but forced.

Your coworker blinked up at you, surprise flashing across his features. “Everything okay?”

You didn’t grace him with a response, instead, you stumbled onto your two feet, ignoring the way the room spun around you. You had decided that you were going to give him a piece of your mind. Yeah, you were going to walk up to him, get all up in his stupid face and tell him exactly how much of an asshole he was. You didn’t care if it was messy. You just… hated looking at his stupid, pretty mug.

Walking over to his side of the table took a great deal of effort. You plopped yourself right down into the empty space right next to him, at the edge of the table. Slowly, he turned to look at you, as if he was about to ask you again, in that rough voice of his, “What the hell are you doing?”

But the words never came. The words never came out, and neither did yours.

Instead, drunken brain figuring actions spoke louder than words, you grabbed him by the collar with a sudden surge of confidence. Then, not giving a rat’s ass who was watching, you had your second drunk incident.

You kissed him. In front of all of your coworkers.

It was messy, frantic, like the last piece of something that had been building up inside of you for far too long. You didn’t know how it happened or why, but there you were, lips pressing desperately against his. Your body swayed with the motion, the alcohol dulling your senses, but there was an overwhelming, irrational clarity in that kiss. You could feel the warmth of his breath, the slight stiffening of his muscles, the way his body went rigid under your touch.

For a moment, everything else ceased to exist.

Then, just as suddenly, Aki pulled away, breaking the kiss with a sharpness that felt too harsh. His eyes were wide, still locked onto you, his lips parted in shock, like he couldn’t quite believe what had just happened.

Your heart skipped a beat, and something cold slithered through you.

What had you done?

His silence stretched between you, heavy and suffocating. The room felt quieter than it had been just moments ago, every noise around you now distorted, as if everything had slowed down just to give you this moment of pure, unrelenting humiliation.

Aki didn’t say anything. He didn’t even flinch, but there was something in his gaze that you couldn’t quite place—something almost… horrified?

No, that wasn’t it.

The silence dragged on until Denji’s voice cut through it, sharp and mocking. “You’re getting just as bad as Himeno,” he said, his grin wide and unrepentant.

Everyone else in the room laughed, the sound of their amusement stabbing through you, making your stomach churn. It should’ve been funny. It should’ve been easy to brush off, but the only thing that mattered was the look in Aki’s eyes.

He wasn’t laughing.

You glanced at him, eyes searching for any hint of reaction, but his expression was unreadable. His gaze was fixed on you, his lips pressed together in a tight line. The others may have been caught up in the moment, but Aki wasn’t. He was staring at you, like he was waiting for you to say something—anything.

Your pulse quickened, and the weight of the room’s laughter pressed down on you. Your head spun. What was happening to you?

You could feel the heat rising in your cheeks, the embarrassment crawling under your skin like a thousand tiny needles. You had hoped for a reaction—hell, you were practically begging for one—but not like this.

You stumbled to your feet again, unsteady but determined to get away from the sharp gaze that had pinned you in place. You couldn’t take it. You couldn’t stand the weight of his stare anymore. You needed to run away.

“I… I’ll be right back,” you muttered, the words slurring just slightly as you turned away, trying to make your escape. “Excuse me.”

You didn’t wait for anyone to respond. You didn’t care if they did. You just had to get out of there.

As you walked away, your vision blurred again, but you didn’t stop. You stumbled towards the bathroom, the sound of your heart pounding in your ears louder than any of the laughter behind you. You didn’t dare look back.

The alcohol had made you bold. It had made you reckless.

But it had also made you stupid.

And as you pushed open the bathroom door and stepped inside, you couldn’t help but wonder what the hell you’d just done.

What the fuck?

What the fuck?

You stopped just inside, pressing your palms to the cool tile of the wall. The rush of alcohol was still clouding your thoughts, but now there was a terrible clarity. You'd just kissed Aki. In front of everyone. In front of all your coworkers. And now... now you were alone with the knowledge of how utterly stupid you had been.

What the fuck? You repeated the thought over and over in your head as you began to pace back and forth in the small, confined space. It was like your body was moving faster than your brain, instinctively trying to outrun the tidal wave of embarrassment and regret crashing through you. You didn’t know if you wanted to scream or cry or—hell, throw something. But no, instead, you just walked in circles, repeating the same mistake over and over in your head, each thought making the room spin more and more.

What the hell had possessed you? You weren’t like this. You didn’t act out. You didn’t make reckless decisions without thinking, not like this, not in a way that could ruin everything. But somehow, in the heat of that moment, everything felt like it had blurred. You were drunk, yes, but there was something else—a need, a want, an impulse that you couldn’t control.

You stopped pacing for a second, staring at your reflection in the mirror. Your lipstick had smeared, probably from when he pulled away. You didn’t even care to fix it. The dark circles under your eyes seemed more pronounced now, the weight of your own humiliation pressing down on you. You looked... stupid. Weak. You had no idea what was running through his head.

Just as you were about to slap yourself for being so fucking reckless, you heard a faint knock at the door. The sound echoed in the silence of the room, jarring, like a warning. You froze, the tension building in your chest, your heart hammering as you realized someone else might be there.

“Occupied!” You didn’t mean to snap, but you couldn’t help it. Your voice came out shaky, uneven, as though you were bracing yourself for some kind of confrontation. The last thing you wanted was to be disturbed.

But then, to your horror, the door swung open anyway.

You looked up in disbelief, ready to shout at whoever dared to enter, but the words died in your throat when you saw who it was.

Aki.

His presence seemed to swallow the space, every inch of the air between you two thick with something unspoken. He closed the door behind him with a soft click, and the sound reverberated, amplifying the sudden quiet. His eyes were locked onto yours, unreadable. You stared at him for a long moment, the reality of your actions setting in like ice water over your body. What the hell was he doing here? Why wasn’t he angry?

You expected him to yell, to storm in and tell you how stupid you were, how you’d embarrassed him in front of everyone. You expected him to scold you, to say something, anything. But he didn’t.

Instead, he just stood there, his gaze unwavering. His mouth parted slightly, as if he was about to say something. You could see the tension in his posture, the way his jaw tightened, the muscles in his neck flexing with a barely contained intensity. But he said nothing. He just stared.

And you, frozen in place, could do nothing but stare back.

It felt like the world had shifted. All the noise outside the bathroom seemed to fall away, leaving only the two of you standing in this charged silence. For a second, you thought you might be able to breathe again, to say something. Apologize, maybe. Tell him you didn’t mean it, that the alcohol had made you do something foolish. But before you could even open your mouth, he stepped forward, closing the distance between you.

His presence enveloped you, too close now, and just as your breath caught in your throat, he kissed you again.

His lips were firm, and for a moment, you didn’t know whether to melt into it or push him away. But then it didn’t matter. You were weak all over again. Everything you had been trying to suppress, all those feelings that had been brewing between you two, came rushing to the surface in that one moment. The kiss was raw, intense, but it wasn’t angry—it was something else. Something neither of you had the words for.

And before you could fully register what was happening, he pulled away.

His eyes were half-lidded, his breath coming in sharp pants as he looked down at you. There was a flicker of something in his gaze, something you couldn’t quite place, but it wasn’t anger. It wasn’t the reproach you’d expected. It was more like confusion, or maybe frustration. His brows furrowed, and he let out a small sigh, as if trying to gather his thoughts.

“God, you’re messing with my fucking head,” he muttered, his voice low, thick with tension. It wasn’t a reprimand, but it felt like a confession. And in the silence that followed, you could hear the weight of everything that wasn’t being said.

You stood there, your heart still racing, the taste of him lingering on your lips, feeling like an idiot. It wasn’t just your body that had betrayed you—it was your mind, too. You had no idea what had made you do it, but now there he was, standing right in front of you, and all you could do was look at him.

You wanted to say something—apologize, maybe. Tell him that you didn’t mean for things to get out of hand, but the words were stuck in your throat. You wanted to say something that would make it all better, but everything you could think of felt hollow in comparison to what had just happened.

And as you stood there, breathless and still, you realized that you couldn’t take back what had just occurred. Not now, not ever.

You both stood there in that space, caught between the tension and the confusion. You had no idea where to go from here.

“I’m messing… with your head?” You slurred, suddenly rather dizzy from the lack of space between you and him. “You’re messing with my fucking head.”

He shook his head, like you couldn’t possibly grasp the depth of what he was telling you, “I’m trying to stay away from you. I’m trying to push you away, but you just… you make it so fucking hard, do you know that?”

You nearly burst into laughter at that. Here he goes again with that heroic bullshit. “Hard to do the right thing?” You teased, voice dropping an octave to mimic him. “Aki, you need to let loose a little. Seriously.”

He sighed, shoulders dropping, leaning into the place where your hand cradled his face like he couldn’t resist. Like he hadn’t been touched so tenderly in his entire life. “I can’t.”

Of course not. You thought. Who else is going to make the decisions for everybody else?

Maybe you weren’t giving him enough credit. Being a captain seemed stressful. You couldn’t imagine having to bear the cross of constant righteousness, let alone the way he did – flawlessly, without a crack in his exterior…

Until now.

“Maybe not, but I think you can allow yourself this one thing. Who cares about the power dynamic when we’re in uniform?” You replied easily, with a smile. 

“Allow myself to indulge in you, you mean,” He retorted, but his tone lacked any bite. Half of a smile rested upon his lips, eyes peering down at you through long, pretty lashes.

Truthfully speaking, he was breathtaking – tired blue eyes gazing into yours, desire replacing what had once been a burning hatred, lips just barely parted around a trembling breath. He looked uncertain and, frankly, drunk.

That was never good news for the two of you.

“Sure,” You shrugged anyway, even though you knew you didn’t even believe the words coming out of your mouth, “What’s the harm in a little fun?”

There was plenty of harm in it, especially when he wasn’t just some faceless hookup. He was the sole occupant of your thoughts, your spirit, your dreams. He was like an obsession, something that (clearly) made you behave rather stupidly. He was dangerous. That much, you knew.

But, standing nearly a foot shorter than him, you couldn’t think about that now. All you could think about was how goddamn pretty he looked beneath the dim, flickering light of the seedy bathroom, fluorescent rays casting shadows over his face, making him look older, somehow.

You could drown in him, you thought. 

“It won’t just be a little fun,” He remarked. “I’m not a half-ass kind of guy. If you want me, you’re gonna get all of me. I don’t do casual sex, that’s the problem.”

I like the sound of that, the dirtier, more depraved part of you thought, but you quickly pushed it down. 

Your hand dropped down to brace itself on his chest, on the hard planes of his pectorals. His much larger one slid up to your jaw, cupping your face oh-so-gently. Then, slowly, his thumb caught on your lower lip, tugging it down ever so slightly, as if testing the waters.

“I want all of you,” You replied. “The good, the bad, whatever the fuck else you got going on. Not like there’s anything casual about this, anyway.”

“You don’t know what you’re saying,” He huffed out a tipsy little laugh, pressing his forehead up against yours. He was close, now – so close that you were dizzy from the scent of him, the beer on his breath, the mint, the nicotine, the cologne. 

He’s still putting that damn wall up.

“Why are you always so worried about protecting everyone else? You’re allowed to enjoy things, even if they might not… hic… be the best idea,” You replied, desperate to get him to open up and let you in for once. You were so close, you could almost taste it.

“So you admit that this is a bad idea?” He answered back, the faintest hint of a smile lingering on his pink lips.

“Very much so. We’re coworkers. You’re my supervisor, and we couldn’t exactly be anything more than more-than-friends,” You breathed out as he leaned in a little closer. Up this close, his nose just barely brushed against the tip of yours. “But I’m a big girl. I’ve done my research. I know exactly what I’m saying,” A pause, during which you exhaled, and then you added, “I meant what I said… I want you to let me have all of you. Everything that you can give me.”

It was true. Every single last word of it – you were desperate for any part of him you could get. If that excluded his heart, then, well, you would do your best to keep your own out of it. 

These sorts of things only ever led to disaster, you knew that.

But you figured you would spend the rest of your life wishing you hadn’t than wishing you had.

“What if…”  He exhaled slowly, like it pained him to do so. “What if things get complicated? You know we can’t really be together, right? And we would have to keep whatever the hell this is a secret?”

“We can cross that bridge when we get there,” You retorted. “I like to think I’m pretty good at keeping secrets. I promise it won’t get in the way of work, or anything else. Just…” You tightened your grasp around the fabric of his shirt, bunching it up into white layers in your fist, “Let me have you. Who cares about doing the right thing? Not like we’re going to Heaven, anyway, right?”

“You hated me a few weeks ago, and now you’re begging for me. You do realize how ridiculous that sounds, right?” He tilted his head. There was a humorous lilt to his words, one that told you that he wasn’t entirely as repulsed by the idea of pursuing a sexual relationship with you as you had originally thought. “What if one of us develops feelings? And what if we were found out? What would everyone else think? It would be your honor on the line.”

He looked so kissable right now, eyes trained on yours in that very unique way of his – the one that made you breathless. Gently, you wrapped your arms around the back of his neck, leaning into him (and not just because you were drunk).

“Fuck what everyone else thinks,” You teased, bringing your faces that much closer together. “I want you, Aki.” Then, trailing a finger down his chest, catching on a button before continuing down, you added, “Let me have you. Who cares about how long it’ll last if we enjoy it, right?”

Aki exhaled sharply, his breath warm against your lips, so close it made your stomach twist into knots. His fingers, rough and calloused, tightened around your jaw—firm, grounding, as if he were trying to memorize the shape of you before he inevitably did something he couldn’t take back. His eyes flickered down to your lips, hesitation warring with need, and for a moment, you thought he was going to pull away.

Then, like a breaking dam, he gave in.

His lips crashed against yours, desperate, consuming, like he had been starving for this and couldn’t stand another second without tasting you. The sheer force of it sent your back colliding with the wall behind you, a breathless gasp slipping from your mouth at the sudden contact. You barely registered the discomfort—all you could focus on was him. Aki, pressing against you, his body flush against yours, his scent overwhelming your senses.

Mint. Smoke. The faintest trace of cologne.

You could have drowned in it. In him.

His mouth was hot, demanding, moving against yours with a fervor that made your knees weak. You didn’t even realize you had grabbed at him until your fingers were tangled in the crisp white fabric of his shirt, fisting it, holding on like you might fall apart without him. And maybe you would. Maybe you already were.

A soft sound escaped you—something caught between a sigh and a whimper—and it made him kiss you harder. His grip tightened at your waist, fingers pressing into the fabric of your uniform, branding you, like he wanted to leave a mark. A reminder. The thought sent a thrill down your spine.

Aki kissed like he fought—intense, calculated, like he was putting every last piece of himself into it. And fuck, it was intoxicating. The way his lips moved with such precision, the way his hands gripped you like he needed you. Like you were something vital.

For a moment, you let yourself believe it.

Then, just as suddenly as he started, he pulled away.

You didn’t even realize you were chasing after him until your lips brushed against empty air, a quiet little noise of protest slipping from your throat. You blinked up at him, dazed, drunk off him. His forehead rested against yours, his breaths uneven, ragged, his hands still clinging to your waist like he didn’t trust himself to let go completely.

He looked at you, blue eyes blown wide, pupils dark with something dangerous, something that made your chest feel tight.

“Okay,” he exhaled, voice rough, strained. His grip on you flexed, like he was solidifying this decision for himself. “I’m in.”

For a split second, you didn’t register it.

Then, you laughed—a breathless, triumphant thing, relief and something far more wicked curling through your veins. Without thinking, you surged forward, capturing his lips again, this time with even more force.

It was messy, a little reckless, but you didn’t care. You wanted to feel him, wanted to take as much as he was willing to give. And for once, Aki didn’t hesitate. His hands found your hips again, pulling you impossibly close, pressing you against the wall like he never wanted to let you go. You hummed into his mouth, satisfaction curling through you like a slow burn, threading through your veins like fire.

He was yours.

At least, for now.

That thought lingered, cold and sharp, somewhere in the back of your mind.

No feelings. No attachments.

You should have been relieved. You should have felt free.

Instead, the words settled in your chest like a warning, like an inevitability you were too far gone to stop.

Back at the table, you forced yourself to smile, laughing at something Himeno said, acting like nothing had happened. Like you hadn’t just had Aki pressed against you in the bathroom, his lips hot and desperate against yours, his hands gripping you like he never wanted to let go. Like you hadn’t been the one to pull him back in when he hesitated. Like your heartbeat wasn’t still pounding in your throat, your body still thrumming with the imprint of him.

You took a sip of your drink, letting the alcohol burn away the taste of him.

Himeno leaned in, her eyes glinting with something sly, something that made your stomach tighten. “So,” she drawled, her chin propped in her hand, “that was some kiss back at the table earlier.” A slow smirk curled at her lips. “And you two took an awfully long time to come back.”

Your fingers tightened around your glass. You kept your expression even, casual. Normal.

“We were talking about it,” you said smoothly, swirling the drink in your hand. “It was a mistake. He was telling me all about… uh, like—policies and shit, and how it can never happen again. You know, the whole nine yards.”

It wasn’t a lie, exactly. He had said all that. Right before you kissed him again.

Himeno tilted her head, eyeing you with lazy amusement. “I thought you hated him.”

You scoffed, shaking your head. “I’m drunk, Himeno. I kissed you. Doesn’t mean I’m gay.”

“Right,” she hummed, but there was something unreadable in her gaze. Like she wasn’t entirely convinced.

You exhaled through your nose, forcing a laugh, leaning in just enough to nudge her arm. “You’re in no position to talk, Miss I’ve-Kissed-Everyone-in-Public-Safety.”

That finally made her snort, but the sharp edge in her expression didn’t fade. She twirled the straw in her drink, eyes flicking to you, then past you, like she was putting something together.

“Never Aki,” she murmured, almost like an afterthought. But her voice had gone quieter, more thoughtful. Her fingers traced absent patterns against the rim of her glass. “He’s a total hardass. I’m surprised he let you.”

Something in your stomach lurched. You swallowed it down.

Her gaze flicked up, meeting yours again, sharper this time. “He’s not the mystery guy, is he?”

You laughed—too quick, too dismissive. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

Himeno exhaled, dragging her thumb across the condensation on her glass. She didn’t look entirely convinced, but she didn’t press it. Just hummed and shook her head, taking another slow sip. “No, you’re right,” she mused. “You guys are total opposites. That would never work.”

She was drinking more now, fingers gripping her glass a little too tightly.

You should’ve felt relieved. Should’ve let the conversation die right there. But your heart was still pounding, your skin still warm where Aki had touched you, and the lie sat heavy in your chest, weighing you down.

Then, your phone buzzed against the table.

You glanced down.

A text from him. You flipped the small device open, scanning the message – the first message you had ever received from him.

CAPTAIN HAYAKAWA: I think you’ve had enough to drink.

Typing…

YOU: Says who?

CAPTAIN HAYAKAWA: The guy watching you sway back and forth like you’re about to pass out.

You blinked, glancing up across the table. Aki wasn’t looking at you—at least, not directly. His posture was the same as always, stiff, unreadable, his attention seemingly on his own drink. But you knew better. Knew he’d been watching, keeping track, the way he always did.

Your lips curled slightly, fingers moving before you could think better of it.

YOU: Guilty. Would you carry me back to my apartment again if I did?

This time, he hesitated. You could picture him, jaw tightening, eyes narrowing ever so slightly at the screen, debating whether or not to indulge you with a response.

You watched him carefully, waiting, your heart hammering just a little too hard against your ribs.

Then, his phone lit up in his hand. His fingers moved.

CAPTAIN HAYAKAWA: Put the beer down.

Something in you wavered.

You stared at the words, at the quiet command laced in them, at the way your body reacted before your mind could catch up. Your fingers tightened around your glass, your grip faltering, indecisive.

Then, slowly, you set the beer down.

You hesitated, only for a second—but the strangest part was that you wanted to obey. Some deep, inexplicable part of you wanted to listen to him, to let him take control, to let him look after you the way he always did.

Even if he never should have. Even if this—whatever this was—couldn’t happen again.

Across the table, Aki’s gaze flickered up, just for a second. Then, your phone buzzed with another message.

CAPTAIN HAYAKAWA: Good girl.

Your breath caught in your throat.

Heat spread through you, slow and dizzying, pooling low in your stomach. You blinked down at the words, pulse hammering behind your ribs. The praise, so simple, so quiet— it got to you. The worst part was that he had to know it would. Had to know what he was doing when he sent it.

Your fingers curled around the device, clutching it tightly in your lap as something restless, something dangerous coiled in your chest. You felt hot—too hot. Like you needed to down the rest of your drink just to cool the sudden heat rising up your spine.

A slow, unbidden smile tugged at the corner of your lips.

Himeno leaned over, peering at you with mild curiosity. “What are you smiling at?”

You blinked, barely even realizing you had been. Quickly, you forced the expression away, snapping the phone shut with a practiced ease.

“Nothing,” you said smoothly, forcing a small laugh, tilting your head like you weren’t completely unraveling on the inside. “I just saw something funny.”

Himeno hummed, unconvinced, but didn’t press.

You exhaled, reaching for your drink on instinct—then, at the last second, you hesitated. Your fingers ghosted over the glass but didn’t lift it. Aki’s words still lingered in your mind, simmering.

You glanced up.

And met his gaze.

It was fleeting, just a second—but in that second, everything tightened. The air between you stretched thin, charged with something neither of you could acknowledge, something too dangerous to name. His expression was unreadable, but his eyes—sharp, unwavering—held yours like a quiet reminder. Like a challenge.

Your pulse skipped.

Then, before you could stop yourself, you smiled. Small. Subtle. Something just for him.

Aki didn’t react, not at first. But you caught it—the way his fingers curled just slightly against the table, the way his throat bobbed as he exhaled slow and steady through his nose.

You tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear, feigning nonchalance, letting the movement ground you.

Then, with a flick of your gaze, you turned back to Himeno—acting as if nothing had happened at all.

a/n: a win is a win. IDC WHAT YALL SAY A WIN IS A WIN!!!! lmk ur thoughtssss ur wantsss, yk the drill. i'm a whore for validation so i'll probably do it!!!!!

credits: einruji__ on twitter . I obviously do not own csm or anything related to it. please do not reproduce, copy, or translate my works anywhere. dont fk w me im a bruja.

also: come find me on my wattpad if u wanna interact more!

taglist: @mitsuyeahhh , @sleepysnk , @enneadec , @noaabean , @em1e , @drakensdarling , @bertholdts--butt , @satanlovesusall666 , @mitsuwuyaa , @noctifule , @scaraphobia , @ask-the-insect-hashira , @lovingranchturkeyweasel , @bontensbabygirl , @slvdsjjk , @novacrystalli , @hanmastattoos , @kodzuksn , @hqtiny , @ohmaiscool15 , @redlittlequeen , @leivane , @goldeneagles-posts , @yeahblahlame , @no-oneelsebutnsu , @cookiesandcreammy , @cawwn , @the-haitani-baton , @littlelovebug98 , @armani78 , @mindurownbussines , @kokos-property , @violetmatcha , @hp-simp505 , @acethebrave , @mitsuyeahhh , @sleepysnk , @enneadec , @noaabean , @em1e , @drakensdarling , @bertholdts--butt , @satanlovesusall666 , @mitsuwuyaa , @noctifule , @scaraphobia , @ask-the-insect-hashira , @lovingranchturkeyweasel , @bontensbabygirl , @slvdsjjk , @novacrystalli , @hanmastattoos , @kodzuksn , @hqtiny , @ohmaiscool15 , @redlittlequeen , @leivane , @goldeneagles-posts , @yeahblahlame , @no-oneelsebutnsu , @cookiesandcreammy , @cawwn , @the-haitani-baton , @littlelovebug98 , @armani78 , @mindurownbussines , @kokos-property , @violetmatcha , @hp-simp505 , @mrshayakawaa, @xxpr3ttyk173rxx

wanna join the taglist? | pornstar ; chapter index

[burningcheese-merchant]

I yearn for Fire Spirit yap... He's also one of my top favorites from crob and I love hearing about people's interpretations/why they like a character. °☆

I love Fire Spirit so much dude lol. Always have. Been playing Ovenbreak for almost 10 years now (whew) and he won a piece of my heart on minute one

For one, I actually really like his design. Simple and sleek. I adore that smug little smirk of his, so cute. I get annoyed when I see people say they think he looks boring, they're all entirely CRK players and thus don't have the understanding or appreciation for FS that OB players do (this is also seen with Rebel and Wind Archer. It pissed me off how harsh so many players were towards Rebel especially. He looks perfect the way he is). Thin-skinned, know-nothing 12 year olds want overdesigned Genshin Impact characters, like a lot of CRK characters ended up looking like (no shade), bc they're too dumb and immature to understand that less is often more

Second, I really enjoy his voice. His is one of the only English ones I actually like. It's perfect imo. Whenever I read through my PitayaFire fics, it's that voice that I hear when I read his lines lol. (I also love his JP and KR voices ofc. Former especially bc he shares a voice with my favorite anime character)

Third and most importantly, I genuinely love his personality. Asshole with a hidden heart of gold is how I always read him. I can't help but be charmed by his cocky, irreverent attitude. Always running his mouth, always got something to say. He's got wit. He's got a bite. He never takes anything lying down. He will roast you both figuratively and literally, and gladly regardless. But somewhere underneath that dickishness is a genuinely good guy. He's been shown to have a soft spot for children (his arc with Habanero + official artwork depicting him looking after Snow Sugar and Apple + him raising an orphaned Tiger Lily (I know that was in the hanja comics and those were never canon, but shut up. I love that part. It's incredibly sweet and adds a lot of depth to his character. FS and TL are adopted father and daughter, you'll never take that from me)). Despite appearances, he actually does work very hard to keep the Dragon's Valley alive and thriving. He cares about Pitaya Dragon and expresses worry/concern over his declining power/condition (although it's a bit more subtle here; you have to read between the lines and pay attention to his expression/sprite). He's friends with the other Elementals, particularly Wind Archer (always imagined a best bros thing with them). Some way, somehow, despite how he is, he still manages to care for others, and others care for him. When push comes to shove, he comes through. He's the kind of character whose actions prove who he REALLY is, behind his harsh words. A jerk with a good soul deep down.

Furthermore, I adore the mystery of his character. It's long since been revealed that he was not always Fire Spirit; he was a regular old mortal once, and became who he is now through a deal with Pitaya Dragon that saved him from the brink of death. Just who was he in the before time? What was his name? Did he always behave the way he does, or was he a completely different person? Does he remember his past at all? Does he care? Does he miss his old life even a little bit? Does he have any lingering questions or concerns or even regrets about the deal he struck and the life he lives now? (I know he said in one scene that he doesn't regret anything, but one really has to wonder with something of that magnitude.) If he knew what would become of him back then, would he have chosen differently? There's so much to consider, you know? It makes him extremely fascinating, more so than almost any other character in the series

And ugh... his relationship with Pitaya Dragon. God I could rant about that forEVER. There's so much interesting complexity underlining their dynamic. Forever bound, in body and spirit, to the person who saved your life... who did so not quite out of genuine altruism, but because they were so impressed and amused by his persistence in the face of certain doom (that's something else I like about him. FS never gives up. He kept fighting for his own life even as it slipped through his fingers like volcanic sand). Who essentially remade him, liberated him from his suffering and his old life and gave him a brand new identity and purpose - one that he now has no choice but to shoulder for eternity. With how old they both are, they must have such a long and storied history together. They must've said and done so much with, to, for each other during all those long years. They mean something to each other, they must, if only because of that. Again, it's been implied more than once that Fire Spirit is genuinely worried about Pitaya Dragon's well-being; some of it is probably due to them being tied together (something happens to Pitaya, something will happen to FS), yes, but what if there's more? And Pitaya Dragon likes Fire Spirit, he never would've helped him if he didn't. So much so that, in one scene, FS remarks that Pitaya didn't think anything of mortals before they met. It was FIRE SPIRIT who changed Pitaya Dragon's mind about the mortal world and its value. It was FIRE SPIRIT that got the ball rolling to where it is today: with Pitaya fostering real, lasting friendships with mortals and standing up for them when they need help. It's why I'm willing to argue that Fire Spirit is the most important person in Pitaya Dragon's life outside of the other dragons. He's the one who inspired Pitaya Dragon to change his ways, whether anyone realizes it or not. Him, NOT Hollyberry. Fire Spirit did all the work fixing that dumb dragon and it's her that gets all the credit. He was by Pitaya's side long before she was ever born. But no, it's her one-note friendly rivalry with Pitaya that gets all the praise while the far more interesting and complex relationship he has with Fire Spirit gets ignored (or worse, relegated to a bs parent/child headcanon). But that's none of my business ig

I could make a whole separate post just yapping about him with Pitaya tbh lol. It grinds my gears that they've had so little time together onscreen. (My tinfoil hat theory is that Devsis knows that it will be extremely, unequivocally gay and are trying to delay the inevitable. FOOLS!) Hopefully he actually does come out in April/May as was hinted at in leaks, and hopefully he gets time with Pitaya. I need more ship fuel.

TL;DR Snarky Fire Man is my all-time favorite Cookie Run character next to Dark Cacao. Asshole with a heart of gold + hidden layers + fascinating mysterious past + interesting relationships with other characters, primarily Pitaya. If I see anyone say he looks boring when he releases I will lose my damn mind

[notablenotions]

Letter from Henry to Hans and Jitka

Hans, Jitka,

Will be home soon. Probably. Maybe.

So—I was helping this lad woo his lass. Friendly favour. Next thing I know, I pushed her down a well by accident. It involved a riding crop, a chilled wheel of blue cheese, and several Latin texts. It was very intellectual actually.

Her suitor—some minor lord—wasn't thrilled. Her father even less so. Especially since it was the morning of her wedding.

They imprisoned me. Fair.

I escaped after discovering a locked pantry containing sausages and a suspicious barrel of vinegar. Used the grease to slip through the bars. Dead clever. Shame the manor caught fire. Not sure how.

On the road, I saw a bear. Looked me dead in the eye. Like a person. So I followed it. We sat. Shared some honey. Talked about mortality. Turns out it likes cheese too. Said goodbye—emotional moment.

Then saw something shiny in a river. Went to pick it up. Looked up. Saw a lass dancing in the shallows. Gorgeous. Full of stories and moonlight. We talked, danced, she gave me a rabbit’s foot that smells like old soup. Read my palm, said I’d “get lucky soon.”

We were mid dance when her father appeared. One of the washerwoman’s sons. Fight broke out. Minor fire. Entire field burned. Possibly the house too.

Stole his horse. Rode like hell. Lost horse in a dice game.

But the winner was kind. Told me of his cousin’s second cousin’s mate’s brother’s sheep’s owner’s booze stash.

Went. Drank. Blacked out.

Apparently, in the interim I:

Started a tavern brawl involving ducks

Proposed to five people (two were nuns)

Taught a goose to swordfight

Replaced a priest’s communion wine with mead

Declared myself “King of Turnips”

Bit a knight on the arse during a duel (apparently not mine)

Convinced a choir to sing nothing but tavern songs

Was found napping in the town fountain, wearing only boots and a flower crown

So now I’m in prison. Somewhere. Unclear where. No one will tell me.

P.S. Dunno where Pebbles is.

– Henry

---

Reply from Hans and Jitka to Henry

Hans writes:

Henry.

I am halfway between tears and absolute collapse. You have, in a single letter, shoved a noble’s bride down a well, burned two estates, befriended a bear, started a cult of cheese, corrupted a choir, bit a knight, and potentially launched a goose-based militia.

You are now legally at war with seven noble houses, one abbey, and nature itself.

I don’t know whether to rescue you or run far, far away.

Wherever you are—stay put. We’ll come get you. Probably with disguises.

– Hans

Jitka adds:

Henry,

You’ve become a legend in the worst possible way. There’s talk of a wandering cheese prophet. A goose duelmaster. A man in boots and nothing else blessing crops with song.

Mutt howled at your letter. Again. I think he senses the chaos.

Stay alive. Avoid fires. Don’t shove anyone else down a well. And for the love of God, stop accepting cursed animal parts from strange women.

We’re coming. Don’t move. Don’t speak. Don’t look at any more bears.

– J.

---

Henry King of a side quest

[chelseeebe]

would that i

18+. mdni. smut!! tommy hagan is mean and there is slight homophobic language! no use of y/n!

part two to this fic! can probably be read on it’s own but p1 will help you understand things!

would that i - hozier because i think steve used tommy as a scapegoat for never being himself and now he doesn’t have to <3

HIHI! i’ve been away for a little while and i apologise tremendously! this is a part two which seems completely out of left field but i found it half-finished and really liked it!! i’m hoping to start posting this multi-part eddie fic i have been working on but i want at least a couple parts solidly finished beforehand because i know exactly what i’m like lol

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

as to be expected, tommy has no interest in steve. three years of friendship washed down the drain for no good reason. on reflection, steve doesn’t really count what tommy and he had as true friendship, they were just using each other.

he was too terrified to be alone while tommy saw that and took full advantage, milking his credit card along the way. 

he’s got you now, he supposes. finding solace in your house, away from the judgemental glares and snickering whispers of his teammates and friends. 

robin seems to be warming up to the idea of having him as a constant presence in your house, though it’s slow and longwinded. steve had found that she was nothing like tommy, she couldn’t be bought with pizza or gifts but not with lack of trying. 

you sit now on the couch, your head in some book with your legs strewn over his lap as the tv plays sunset avenue loudly. he’d never take someone like robin as an avid soap opera watcher, but then again, he shouldn’t be either. 

“donna should’ve left him years ago,” steve adds, a comment that was supposed to stay tucked away in his mind. 

you look up slowly, robin’s head turns, confusion plastered across your faces. 

“what?” you laugh, placing the book down on your lap. 

he just shrugs, eyes darting between both pairs of baffled eyes, “david’s an asshole.. she should’ve left.” 

“no no, i got that, i’m just- you watch this crap?” 

he shrugs again, “yeah,” finding great pleasure in the way he had finally gotten robin to crack a smile, “my mom used to watch it.. what’s the big deal?” 

you look to robin, a knowing smirk on your lips before picking up your book again. 

robin just grins, “oh steve harrington, i think we might just be friends.” 

and thus, a weekly tradition was born. 

he and robin would settle in for their fill of second-rate acting every tuesday at eight on the dot. 

he lets her know that her opinions are trash and she kindly tells him to fuck off back to the barn he was born in. they were two peas in a pod really. 

steve appreciates the newfound friendship. it’s comforting in ways no one else had ever been. he just hopes robin sees it that way too, he’d had his fill of one-sided friendships to last a lifetime. 

-

steve hadn’t really left your side since the night he tumbled down your staircase and proceeded to confess, rather terribly, that he was practically in love with you. 

he doesn’t mind, he likes spending time with someone who actually likes him for once. 

even now, as steve attempts to settle down for the night, you’re restless, sat at your vanity rooting through your makeup. 

“so i’ve been thinking,” you did a lot of that, most of it nonsensical. 

“hmm?” quirking his brow, always a little worried for what was about to blurt out. 

“i think you should let me put eyeliner on you,” spinning around to face him with a maniacal grin, the pencil already poised in your hand. 

there was one outcome here, and it absolutely involved you jabbing a pencil into his eye. 

“do i get a choice?” he asks naively, knowing the answer was certainly a no. 

you shake your head, smile stretching from ear to ear, gesturing for him to scoot back. eddie wore eyeliner, and those guys on your posters. is that why you wanted him to? to be more like them?

steve swallows that thought, pummels it down until it’s but a quiet whisper. he liked you for you, surely you felt the same. 

“if you really don’t want me to, i won’t,” sensing his apprehension, you were pushy and stubborn but not cruel. 

he blinks, who would ever see? maybe you’d tell robin, but she certainly wouldn’t care, in fact, she’d probably think he were cooler. “i wanna make you happy,” smiling softly, “and if putting eyeliner on is what makes you happy then.. do it.” 

your eyes light up, coming to stand between his knees, “you’re sure?”

steve nods his head, lying back on your bed as you get up to straddle his waist, black kohl pencil in hand. 

your thumb delicately holds the skin down, allowing the pencil to line his waterline. it stings for a second, an unfamiliar feeling of a pencil jabbing his eye. 

“babe ow,” exaggerating greatly. truthfully, he enjoyed the attention, the focused look on your face as your tongue peeks out in concentration. 

“shut up,” moving onto his other eye without much warning, his right eye blinking rapidly. “okay,” you smile, “sit up.”

he does as he’s asked, like always. holding onto your hips as he shuffles, keeping you steady on his lap. 

“oh my god,” gasping once his eyes meet yours fully, “oh my fucking god,” swooning over his forced makeover. 

“you like it?” he asks innocently, none the wiser to how he actually looked. 

your hands grab his cheeks, shifting on his thighs with excitement, “i love it,” gazing deep into his soul, “i just wanna kiss you.” 

the side of his mouth quirks, snaking his arms around your waist, “you can always do that.” 

“i know,” gladly connecting your lips, a softer appreciation for the intimacy you got to share now. nothing felt rushed or scary, you were able to enjoy each other without fear of getting caught. 

he keeps your body pulled tight to his, laying you back onto the mattress as he crawls on top, his hands sliding underneath your shirt. steve hadn’t realised how much he appreciated having sex in a bed and not his cramped car. 

your fingers brush the falling tendrils back from his face, interwoven into his hair with such tender loving care that it sends shivers down his spine. 

they hover over his scalp, tracing gentle patterns to the sensitive skin, “you’re so handsome,” mumbling into his mouth, “i can’t believe you’re my boyfriend,” lifting your back from the mattress to allow him the space to tug your sweatpants down. 

“it should be me saying all that,” steve marvels, admiring the curve of your hips, the way your thighs fit him so perfectly between them. “you’re too good f’me,” saying so earnestly, he should be thanking the gods you ever looked at him twice. 

“stop it,” you hush, interlocking your lips once more in a bid to stop him rambling on and ruining the moment. 

steve sighs faintly, ridding himself of his shirt, giving you free reign of the delicate skin of his neck you loved so much. your lips find it first, peppering short kisses in the crook between his neck and collarbone, only for your teeth to graze the skin soon after. 

he enjoyed seeing your mark on him, violet and maroon splotch’s that meant he was yours. 

his hips grind down mindlessly, rutting desperately against your soft thigh. 

“we have to be quiet,” you mutter into his collarbone, cradling the back of his head in your hands, the feel of your thigh brushes against his ribcage as you shift beneath him. 

“i know,” he breathes, fumbling with his boxers in a desperate attempt to tug them down and feel you.  

“fuck,” almost growling as you bite down onto your bottom lip, “i can’t stop looking at you,” admiring his focused expression, the charcoal lines you’d painted below his eyes. 

“don’t,” fisting his cock, gliding his piece between your slick folds, “keep your eyes on me, darling,” nudging inside, his leaking tip just barely sinking into your cunt before you’re clawing desperately at his clammy neck, gasping into his ear. 

“sh-shit,” speaking in shuddered breaths, praying you won’t wake robin next door. on occasions, he missed the backseat of his bmw, for this very reason. 

he hadn’t heard you so loudly in months, the filthy, x-rated shit you used to growl only came out in whispers now. alas, his back had finally recovered after those weeks of trying to manoeuvre around the tiny backseat of his car and the faint scent of sex had faded. 

your delicate fingers stroke his jaw, panting in succession with his hips. he can see the exact moment the idea springs into your mind, moving your thumb to the plump skin of his bottom lip, itching for him to catch on. 

steve does, always one to please, you especially so. taking your thumb between his lips to suck gently on the digit, he can feel you practically convulse in response. clenching around him, keeping him so tightly wound inside you. 

“holy fuck,” releasing the most animalistic growl alongside your wretched smirk, ogling his face, tracing the curve of his lips with hooded eyes. 

taking his sweet, sweet time tonight, hips rocking at a astonishingly slow pace, hoping to keep you concealing your sweet moans for just a little bit longer. 

adoring the way you keep your eyes trained on him, humming in appreciation when his tongue dances around your thumb. 

your other hand brings his face closer, sliding your thumb down his plump bottom lip to replace it with your lips instead. groaning into his mouth when his hips still and his tongue runs the length of your bottom lip. 

messy and slow, just the way steve liked it. he wasn’t opposed to the hard and fast dynamic you shared either, but this way he could truly feel you, admire your curves and your warmth as it deserved. 

“can’t believe you’re mine,” he grumbles through shared kisses, fingers groping at your doughy hip.

the bed frame creaks as he moves again, disregarding how obvious the sound was to stay in this very moment. he wants to swallow you whole, sucking and nibbling ravenously at your jaw, trailing down to your neck. a safe haven for him to whine loudly. 

“ohh yeah, fuck- all yours,” reassuring him of what he already knew. 

steve shifts your legs, pressing down gently on the backs of your knees to allow himself further, deeper even. your eyes rolling into the back of your head when his cock nestles into your sweet spot. 

“shit baby, feels so fucking good,” murmuring through gritted teeth, his pace faltering as you rut back against him. 

he feels so obscenely close to you, connected in such a way that’ll leave your souls entwined forever. 

you’re close, steve can feel that much. no need for desperate gasps when you made it so obvious every time. you become accustomed to a person’s body when you spend every waking moment with them. 

“give it to me honey,” he pleads, unrelenting with his strokes, desperate for you to come undone beneath him before he lost it all completely. 

your whines become frenzied mewls, panting and sighing into his neck. 

steve’s arms tremble, succumbing to his own climax, especially when your thighs spur him on, entrapping him inside, your cunt clenching, tumbling over the edge with a chorus of pleas and utterances of his names. 

“ohh yeah- oh fuck yeah,” pumping thick ropes of cum into your hole, a decision he’d probably come back to regret. that didn’t matter now, not with you so placid underneath him, clutching onto his damp skin like you’d never let him go. 

he all but collapses, chest to chest, both heaving against one another. you sigh wearily, running your fingers along his shoulder, right up to his cheek, “i don’t think we were very quiet,” chuckling into the warm air. 

he shakes his head, “that’s your fault,” brushing the wisps of hair from your sticky forehead, admiring your spent state. 

“i love you, steve,” saying it aloud for the first time, exasperated but wholly true nonetheless. 

steve chokes on his tongue, the words had laid dormant for months now, only they fail to form at the most crucial time. dumbfounded by your admission as if it weren’t obvious. 

he coughs up a reply, cradling your jaw in his palm, “i love you too.. i really do,” slow brushes of his thumb on your skin, proving his full adoration of you. 

your smile causes his heart to thump, “i know.. but you gotta get off me so i can shower,” gently pushing his dead weight away, rolling out from underneath. 

his heart full of love and affection, you were everything to him and you hadn’t a clue. 

-

steve awakens to your alarm blaring, the weight of your body keeping him anchored to the bed. he peers over your lifeless body to the clock, 7:32 it reads. 

fuck. 

he was late. 

he peels your arm from his side, rolling out of bed to slam his fist on the frankly grating clock. you grumble in response, reaching your arm out for his hand, “don’t go,” murmuring into the pillow as you come around. 

“honey, i’m late,” he coos, pulling his sweatpants on, the remnants of your makeover smeared all over the pillow. “i’ll see you later, okay?” leaning over to place a gentle kiss to your forehead, receiving nothing but a soft hum in response. 

he hadn’t thought any more of his face until he busted through the locker room doors, receiving ten-fold the usual stares he’d get. 

they all snicker amongst themselves, elbowing one another as his heart sinks to his ass. dating you was one thing, wearing makeup was an entirely different thing. 

steve wants to die, far more than he usually does at this time of day. shoving himself into the far corner in hopes that they’d leave him alone enough to allow him to scrub at it. 

“are you wearing eyeliner?” jason perks up, grimacing right in his face. never subtle nor ever caring to be. 

steve shakes his head, his fingers trembling as he drops his bag on the bench, wondering if it’d be easier to just sprint out of here before tommy clocks on. 

too fucking late. 

tommy rounds the corner just as he takes off his shirt, a littering of violet markings scattered across his neck and collarbones. in any other circumstance, he’d show them off, be proud to be claimed by you. 

but not now. not as tommy whistles, scoffing to himself, “holy shit, what’re you fucking a vampire or somethin’?” the quip leaving his lips before he has time to spot the dark rings around his eyes. 

“fuck off,” steve retorts, pulling his jersey over his mop of hair, he’d had no time to style it this morning, treasuring his time with you instead. 

“you wearing makeup?” tommy punches his shoulder, far heavier than steve could brush off as just playful banter, “my god, steve.. she’s turned you into a fucking queer,” his words snide and venomous. 

a tongue so heavy and harsh, steve was genuinely surprised that that was the worst he’d said. 

though it doesn’t lessen the sting, watching the locker room erupt into laughter at his expense. 

tommy doesn’t deserve a reaction, knowing full well that any retaliation would end in a bloody nose and a busted lip. 

everything was new to steve, being the laughed-at rather than the laugher. now he understands why eddie hated him, why robin wasn’t interested in friendship or why people seemed to turn the other way when he was coming. 

it’s dreadful, the whirling nausea in his stomach and the flaming hot feel of his cheeks. nothing could’ve ever prepared him for being on the receiving end of tommy’s abuse. 

he barges past, desperate to just get their mandated practice over with and get the hell away from them all. 

he hadn’t understood it until now, how scared he must have made people feel, how dreadful he must have made their lives- your life. 

and eddie’s. 

steve didn’t deserve you at all, nor the kindness of your friends or your forgiveness for that matter. you deserved better, someone who wouldn’t get uneasy over eyeliner or kept you a secret for the first three months of your relationship. 

steve knows now that he wasn’t ashamed of you, he was scared. 

scared of tommy and his poisonous tongue, his teammates beady, judgemental eyes that saw him- saw you- as less than. 

he can’t face you tonight, unworthy of your warm bed and gentle embrace. questioning whether he had the gall to ever face you again. 

-

music thumps from below, showing no signs of stopping. a few months ago steve would have been right down there with them all, probably letting his mind wander back to you, just like it was doing now. 

he doesn’t like being here much anymore, the boys were too loud, too boisterous for steve to settle properly. the smell of stale beer and shoddily rolled joints lingered in every room, miles apart from your cluttered yet tidy house

he misses your bed, with the clean blankets and the fresh sage and lavender you kept in vases around your room. 

he misses you. 

screw it. 

if he wasn’t going to sleep well here, he might as well go back to where he belongs. shoving clothes into his bag without a second thought, he practically lived with you anyway, his own drawer full of clothes and other random shit he’d accrued. 

the clock reads 1:31, you’d probably be asleep but he’ll try his luck either way, the spare key tucked under the doormat if you really didn’t answer. 

sliding down the stairs and out of the door before anyone could notice him and poke fun at his co-dependency issues. 

it was only a short walk to your place, one he’d done a thousand times by now. passing other students just getting back from the bar or the library, paying him no mind, not like they used to. 

steve prefers it this way, without the notoriety that came with being tommy’s lapdog. 

tommy upset a lot of people, so in their eyes, steve also upset a lot of people. 

he supposes that’s fair, he’d never tried to intervene or stop tommy’s behaviour, a willing participant just by being there. 

he’d got his comeuppance though, what with being shunned by his basketball teammates and now becoming bullied as opposed to the bully. 

fortunately, there’s no time to stew on what his karmic punishment may be, sidling up the cracked path to your front door in record time. 

much to his surprise your light is on upstairs, a faint orange glow from behind the curtain. it settled his raging heart to know you were only seconds away. 

rapping his knuckles lightly against the door, hoping he’ll catch your attention and not robin’s. he could pelt pebbles at your window he supposes, truly old school romance. but he’s not sure how much you’ll appreciate that. 

the thought is futile anyway, he can hear your feet shuffle and creep down the stairs, flickering the lights on as you go. 

inching the door open to peer out, not expecting steve on the other side, “steve? what’re you doing here?” though you don’t sound angry, or even slightly annoyed for that matter. you look relieved that he’s here, after what was clearly a restless night for you too. 

“sorry, i tried.. i missed you too much,” pathetically shrugging his shoulders, “-is that my shirt?” knowing full well that it was. 

your head dips, becoming immediately bashful, “yeah, i missed you, i’m sorry,” pulling at the worn hem, weary eyed and full of sleep. “come in, it’s cold,” tugging him inside by the hand and locking the door behind him.

steve glances up the stairs, he knows the drill by now. traipsing after you like a little lost dog, he can’t help but let his eyes trail down to your thighs, his favourite tattoo of yours, a snake that wrapped around your leg peeks out from under his shirt. 

“and my boxers?” reaching out to brush his hand over your thigh, resisting the urge to pinch and grope like he really wanted. 

“sorry,” flashing a smile over your shoulder, “i told you i missed you,” hushed whispers as you pass robin’s room, her soft snores heard from the hallway. 

“stop saying sorry, i like it,” he mutters, clicking the door closed. back in his domicile, a wave of comfort washing over him immediately. 

“then good,” cradling his cold cheeks, “i’m glad you like it,” placing a soft, docile kiss on his lips,  clutching onto his hip, desperate to keep him close after a torturous twelve hours apart. 

steve hums in appreciation, relishing in the moment, wafts of coconut from your shampoo fill his nose as his chin settles on your head. 

“i don’t think i like sleeping without you anymore,” he’s laughing but he’s deadly serious, he felt empty without you, like a piece of himself was missing. 

there’d never been a time that steve had thought he’d become one of those unhealthy co-dependent people, but now he understands it completely. wanting to share your company constantly, missing your adoring touch and sarcastic jokes at his expense. 

“mhm, you don’t have to,” swaying in the low light, where the edges of you are a little fuzzy but his brain is still too amped up to sleep. 

“did i wake you up?” steve asks, lingering hands on your back before breaking apart. 

you shake your head no, kicking your obnoxiously cliche bunny slippers off under the bed, “i couldn’t sleep.. something was missing but i’m not sure what,” cracking a smile, tucking yourself into the soft blankets. 

ridding himself of his sweatshirt and jeans before crawling on in, right next to you. at peace once more, fatigue seeping through his veins. 

“how was your day?” he asks, settling in to his rightful space. 

your eyes roll back, “same old.. i passed that report i was worried about though, what about you? you look exhausted,” jutting out your bottom lip. 

steve mumbles some half-assed response, something about a long day and being tired but you’re too wise to his tricks, tilting your head when he doesn’t answer your question. 

“what happened?” settling into the bed next to him, “was it tommy again?” pulling the blanket tight around your shoulders, peeking inquisitively over the pillow. 

steve hums, staring at the ceiling, “i forgot to take that makeup off last night,” shrugging, because to most it wasn’t a big deal but people like tommy and jason aren’t in the 90s like the rest of humanity. 

“and they had a problem with that?” you ask, rather naively, because what other reaction would they have? 

“mhm,” he nods, swallowing his hurt, “tommy said some shit.. brought you up, it’s just- stupid, they’re stupid,” not seeing the need to repeat what he had said verbatim but hopefully saying enough for you to understand. 

he can’t see you though he can hear the blanket ruffle, “what’d he say?” 

steve doesn’t want to repeat it. he’s said some stupid things throughout high school but that wasn’t him anymore. 

“he.. he called me a- babe i don’t- i’m not saying it,” turning to face you, pleading with you to understand. “he said you made me.. gay, alright?” 

your brow knits together, doubtful that it were just annoyance and not pure wrath, “what a fucking-,” stopping yourself from saying anything else, that wasn’t the intention, “did it upset you?”

steve contemplates for a second, truthfully, he hadn’t really been able to really articulate his feelings. he wasn’t upset that he’d been called that, more so upset that someone he once called a friend could think so little of him over eyeliner. 

“i don’t know.. i’m not gay- i mean, i don’t have any problem with it, it’s just-,” he sighs, struggling to find the right words, “i dunno, he just said it so.. so angrily.. like it’d be the worst thing in the world if i was.” 

you exhale, not meeting his eye, “tommy’s just.. jealous, he’s intimidated by anyone that isn’t like him,” a concentrated look settles on your face, “he doesn’t have a job or a girlfriend, i mean, he’s barely gonna graduate.. it’s no surprise he’s pissed off that you’ve grown up without him.” 

it’s undeniably the truth, and yet it still hurts. 

this stemmed from tommy’s inability to grow up, and his raging jealousy towards anyone who was actually comfortable enough to be themselves. steve knows what tommy said to you, visiting the bar where you work just to try and get into your pants behind his back. 

he doesn’t hate you, he hates that you don’t care what he thinks of you. and neither does steve. anymore at least. 

“you’re really good at this,” he snickers, reaching over to stroke your cheek, “i don’t say it enough but i really appreciate you.” 

your smile creeps onto your lips, eyes creasing as it grows, “you say it, don’t worry,” leaning into his soft hand, “or you show me, at least,” feeling your smirk against his palm. 

“oh yeah? how do i do that then?” letting his own lips quirk up. 

“hmm lots of ways,” dismissing him with a shake of the head, “like when you kiss my head every morning before you leave orrr..” failing to turn this conversation around, “when you make me cum three times before even thinking about yourself.”

that was honestly just his duty as your boyfriend, your pleasure is paramount and seeing your eyes roll back and your thighs start to tremble meant the world. 

his chuckle bellows, louder than intended. “i’ll always make sure you cum first, don’t worry,” gaze flickering back to the ceiling, contemplating his next words. “even when we’re old and gray,” he’d been thinking it for a while, you deserved to know too. 

“oh?” yawning through your words, “are we going to get old and gray together then?” as if it weren’t a certainty. 

steve hums, unsure of how much detail to divulge, “oh yeah, i’ve got this all planned out,” his tongue clicks against his teeth, “you just have to agree.” 

you laugh sleepily, talking into the soft pillow at this point, “and you think you’re gonna tie me down?” 

he pauses again, “hmm no, i know i’m gonna marry you,” waiting for your reaction to his outlandish claim, though it doesn’t come. 

steve looks over, finding your eyes pressed shut and your mouth slightly open, soft snores floating out and into your room. 

“goodnight then,” reaching over to press a gentle kiss to your forehead before flicking the lamp off and settling in. 

he would die a happy man if he got to talk nonsense with you for even one more night. 

-

eddie was hesitant to invite steve, it was his birthday after all. he understood, it’d take a while to earn his trust and respect, that was fair. 

but you were insistent, pestering eddie until he crumbled and said steve could join you all at the bar. so long as he was nice and didn’t bring any trouble. 

easy enough. 

steve keeps with you mostly, trailing around after you like a lost puppy dog. fetching drinks and accompanying you to and from the bathroom. fulfilling any and all boyfriend duties. 

“i’m just going to get another drink,” standing from the booth to shuffle over his legs, “stay here, i won’t be long,” patting his shoulder rather patronisingly. 

oh no. 

robin was in the bathroom, you were going and the two guys that eddie had arrived with were in a heated game of pool inside. leaving him no choice but to talk to him. 

“you’ll be okay, won’t you?” already walking off, leaving him with really no other option but to make awkward small talk with eddie. 

steve can sense how painfully awkward this was about to be, neither of them wanting to acknowledge the other without you here to mediate. 

no doubt some cunning plan of yours to get them talking. 

he determines that being the one to break the silence is the better move, clearing his throat before speaking, “so.. you having a nice birthday?”

“mhm,” short and curt, exactly as he expected. “i’m glad..” clearly struggling to be nice, “glad you could come,” his eyes flicker to the stone floor, “you’re not so bad, actually.” 

wow. 

steve almost falls out of his chair. 

he doesn’t know what to say, eddie had never been so polite, “th-thank you,” eddie already thought of steve as a loser, he didn’t need to make it any worse. 

eddie offers his cigarette carton out to steve, an olivia branch of peace or something. at least that was how steve saw it. it’d be rude not to take one. 

“thanks,” he hums, lighting the cigarette himself before offering his lighter out. 

it’s peaceful, and far less awkward than it had been just twenty minutes ago. maybe they could be friends, they had a common interest after all. 

“you know i used to overcharge you for weed, right?” eddie chuckles, taking a drag of his cigarette, narrowed eyes focused on steve.

he just sighs because yes, you had explained in great detail that thirty dollars was nowhere near the correct price for a gram of weed. “yeah.. she told me,” smiling back through his embarrassment. 

“sorry dude,” he shrugs, though it sounds completely insincere, “but you deserved it,” stubbing out the embers of his cigarette. 

“yeah, that’s fair,” he’d done far worse, he’s sure. 

just as they collapse into laughter, you and robin swan back through the door, carrying a tray of what looked like tequila. 

“absolutely not,” eddie cries out, watching robin grin as you hand them out. 

“it’s your birthday! don’t be so bor-“ interrupted as the door swings open again, a chorus of voices steve unfortunately recognised following suit. 

tommy, and his new lackeys stumble in, catching sight of your little party immediately. 

“this is sweet,” he mocks, “where was my invite, stevie? i thought we were best friends!” his tone patronising and his eyes narrow and dark, just as they were in the locker room. 

steve doesnt meet his eye, his didn’t deserve that respect. “we should go..” finding your infuriated gaze instead, noticing your clenched jaw. 

this wasn’t a fight worth having. 

tommy’d win whatever happened. 

“leaving so soon? but we just got here!” sneering at your silenced group, “c’mon man, where’s your hospitality?” swaggering over to the table, an overbearing grin that steve wants to wipe right off of his face. 

he won’t. of course. 

this is eddie’s birthday and tommy’s thoughtless stunts won’t get in the way of him becoming friends with your friends. 

but eddie’s up before steve can do anything about it, fist drawn back until it quickly meets tommy’s nose, a loud crack and a guttural groan follows. 

tommy grabs his nose, only to pull it back stained red, “what the fuck man!” staggering backwards like he didn’t deserve that and worse. 

eddie turns, entirely unfazed by his actions, “i think we should go home,” finding each of your eyes. he didn’t look ashamed, or even slightly concerned about the blossoming bruises on his knuckles, instead, he was proud. 

steve can’t sling his arm around him fast enough, stumbling out of the bar in sheer shock that that had really just happened. someone had finally shown tommy hagan up. 

“thanks man,” steve mutters into his ear, watching as you and robin attempt to hail a cab. 

eddie claps his hand against steve’s back, shaking his head slightly, “that wasn’t just for you,” his eyes trained on your back, “but her too.” 

their shared affection for you had been their means to come together, steve can recognise that eddie only ever wanted what was best for you. and now he thinks that eddie might just see that he was worthy enough to be that.

[clemeientene]

𝗕𝗟𝗘𝗔𝗖𝗛 𝗫 𝗕𝗟𝗢𝗢𝗗 [Yan!Hitman x Gn!Reader] [PROLOGUE]

DISCLAIMERS, WARNINGS & AUTHOR’S VERY PROFESSIONAL NOTES

this story contains:

Murder. (Casual.)

Blood. (A lot of it.)

A hitman with anger issues. (But he smells good, so it’s fine.)

A cleaner MC who is definitely not normal.

(Because why are you so good at this?)

Ridiculous yandere behavior. (Please do not attempt this at home.)

Slice-of-life. (But crime-flavored.)

--Disclaimer--Disclaimer--Disclaimer--

This is a fictional work. Not real. Ridiculous. Stupid. And most importantly—for entertainment purposes only. I, the author, do not condone murder, crime, or falling in love with emotionally unavailable hitmen. (But if he smells good, I understand.) Also, I do not support yandere behavior. But Mr. Zy isn’t real, so we can enjoy this in peace. The images are not mine :D They are ither edited or they came from Pinterest.

- Regarding the Highly Suspicious Cleaning Accuracy-

Do I know how to clean up crime scenes? Heh. A secret. (Just kidding. I googled it. Also, don’t believe everything I say—this is not an expository essay, it’s fictional chaos.)

-Timeline? What’s That?-

This is slice-of-life. No exact timeline. Time flows as it pleases. Logic? We don’t know her. Now, buckle up, grab your pink apron, and enjoy the ride.

PROLOGUE...

You had dreams once.

Not, like, big dreams—nothing too delusional, nothing that involved saving the world or becoming some great person. No, your dreams were reasonable. Manageable. Simple.

Maybe get a nice job. Something where you wouldn’t have to deal with too many people (because, let’s be honest, most people are gross). Maybe a stable paycheck. An apartment that doesn’t come with complimentary cockroaches. A life that isn’t actively falling apart.

…And yet, here you are.

Veygrove City—Home of Crime, Blood, and Probably a Future Headline With Your Name in It.

Look, Veygrove isn’t exactly known for its safety. It’s the kind of place where the crime rate is so high, the police just stopped pretending they cared. Where the rich live in luxury, the poor get stepped on, and the middle class? Doesn’t exist. Nope. This is not Gotham.

This city eats people alive. And if you’re not careful, you become part of the pavement.

Which is why you tried to play it safe.

Which is why you, a completely normal and responsible 24-year-old, took an internship at a totally legit (read: highly questionable) office.

And now?

Now you’re watching your boss bleed out on his own desk.

One Hour Ago: Another Day, Another Scam

Your current job? A glorified call center scam.

Officially, the company was called "Greenleaf Financial Solutions." In reality, you were working for a bunch of sweaty, coffee-addicted conmen scamming people out of their money. You were supposed to be learning “business strategies.” Instead, you spent most of your time not touching anything (because, ew, these desks were disgusting) and trying to ignore your coworker, Greg, who smelled like expired deli meat.

But, hey. It paid the bills. Barely.

At least the job didn’t require much. You were a cleaner here, which meant two things:

You cleaned up paperwork—aka shredded anything incriminating when the wrong kind of people came knocking.

You cleaned up actual messes—which mostly meant spilled coffee, but given the shady nature of this place, you figured it was only a matter of time before you had to mop up something worse.

(You were right. You just didn’t think it would be this soon.)

Present Time: Boss Down, Hot Guy Up

It happened so fast, you almost didn’t process it.

One second, your boss—a greasy, rat-looking man named Dominic—was screaming at some very tall, very brooding man in a dark suit. The next?

Bang.

Blood. Everywhere.

Your boss slumped forward, a bullet between his eyes, and the man holding the gun didn’t even blink. Just casually adjusted his grip, exhaled smoke from his cigarette, and—without a single ounce of urgency—tucked his gun away like this was Monday.

…Okay. So. That happened.

You should probably react. Scream, cry, run, something.

Instead, all your brain managed was:

Wow. He’s hot.

Which—not the appropriate response. But in your defense, the man was ridiculously attractive in a tall, dark, and dangerously competent kind of way. Late 30s? Early 40s? Sharp suit, broad shoulders, goatee, and an expression so unreadable it could probably scare the IRS. The whole gritty hitman aesthetic was working way too well.

(Your poor, thirsty little brain was thriving in the worst moment possible.)

He turned to you.

Paused.

Narrowed his eyes, cigarette burning lazily between his fingers.

You swallowed.

So. Uh. What’s the move here? Panic? Faint? Run?

Apparently, none of the above. Because, instead, this absolute hell of a man reached into his pocket, pulled out a sleek black business card, and slid it across the desk—right through the blood.

"Want a job?"

You stared at him. Then at the card. Then back at him.

The blood on the card was fresh—approximately 4 minutes old (judging by viscosity and color).

And, God help you, all you could think was: Wow, he smells expensive.

You picked up the card.

You flipped the card between your fingers, the blood smearing just a little. The edges were crisp, the lettering elegant—nothing cheap, nothing rushed. Classy.

Zy (No last name. Just Zy. Mysterious.)

Underneath, a phone number. No title, no company name, no unnecessary details.

Simple. Efficient. Very much "call this number and you're in a crime syndicate now."

You looked up. He was still watching you, deep blue eyes unreadable, cigarette smoldering between his fingers.

His hair—just slightly gray at the temples—was neatly combed back, and that mustache? Oh. Oh, it was working for him. Distinguished. Refined. Daddy-coded.

(I should not be finding this man attractive.)

But, hey. You were jobless now. So.

You: "What kind of job?"

Zy’s lips quirked—barely noticeable, but it was there. Amusement? Interest? Hard to tell. His voice, when he spoke, was deep. Steady. A low timbre that made you want to lean in, just a little.

Zy: "Cleaning."

A pause. You narrowed your eyes.

You: "Cleaning… what, exactly?"

He exhaled, the scent of expensive tobacco curling between you. Then, as if he wasn’t offering something completely insane, he gestured loosely toward your ex-boss’s corpse.

Zy: "This."

Ah.

Ah.

You tapped the card against your palm.

You: "…So. Just to clarify. You’re offering me a job to clean up… murder?"

Zy: "Crime scenes, evidence disposal, asset management." He paused, then added, "And occasionally, laundry."

…Okay, what?

Your brain did a small, polite error 404 before catching up.

You: "Laundry."

Zy: "Dry cleaners can be unreliable."

You blinked.

This man—this deadly, extremely well-dressed, unreasonably attractive hitman—was out here committing murder and complaining about bad customer service?

Honestly? Fair. Dry cleaners were a scam.

Still, you kept your expression neutral.

You: "And what’s the pay?"

Another hum. Zy took another slow drag of his cigarette, then—carefully—leaned forward just enough that you could smell the faint cologne beneath the smoke. Musky. The kind of scent that stayed with you.

He tilted his head slightly, watching you like he could already predict your answer.

Zy: "More than this place paid you."

…Alright. You weren’t dumb.

One job had you making minimum wage while surrounded by fraud and Greg’s questionable hygiene.

The other? Significantly less legal, but significantly more lucrative.

And—objectively speaking—you were good at cleaning. Great, even. You could erase bloodstains, scrub out evidence, dismantle crime scenes with the efficiency of a damn forensics team.

And if you happened to have a dangerously attractive, mustached employer with deep blue eyes? Well.

That was just a bonus.

You slipped the card into your pocket.

You: "When do I start?"

The slowest smirk. Zy stubbed out his cigarette, stood up, and—without another word—walked past you, already expecting you to follow.

So.

That’s how you got hired by the most dangerous man in Veygrove.

Neat.

[average-imperfection]

The ghosts and German handwriting

Completely niche, self-indulgent topic no one cares about except me but I would really love an episode in S2 where Emma finds an old hand-written document that she wants to decipher, and she goes to the ghosts for help, only to find that none of the ghosts can read it either because 1) it's just plain bad handwriting and 2) it's written in this specific handwriting that was only taught in schools from the 1910s to the 1940s and they don't have a ghost from that period on hand. Context: Around the beginning of the Modern era, in Germany (and some other countries too but this is about Germany) people started using two parallel handwriting systems. One, the so-called Latin cursive, was very close to the cursives used in other countries at the time and can still be read somewhat easily today. The other, the more commonly used one, was called Kurrent. Which one you used depended on context. Loan words, place names and quotes for example would often be written in Latin cursive, even if the rest of the text was in Kurrent. Here an example of the word Generalienmäßig (in the manner of generals) which has the first half written in Latin cursive and the second part in Kurrent to show the difference.

People nowadays still learn cursive in school (at least they did when I was in school) but since the 40s they'd only learn a cursive close to the Latin one. Kurrent has completely disappeared from schools and now you'll mostly only encounter it at the university level when you're studying history or archival science or something similar. Svenni and Joachim probably didn't learn how to read/write it. But, if Kurrent has been around for so long, wouldn't Friedrich or Adelheid be able to read it? Generally, yes. But of course writing styles have evolved over the 200+/100+ years since they've been dead as well. Here's what Friedrich's handwriting could have looked like:

(This one's a bit of a mix of Kurrent and Latin cursive but wikimedia didn't have any other good examples for Friedrich's time so it is what it is lol Here are Friedrich's and Ludwig's actual handwritings from the show, even if they're not very legible. Kudos to the set dressers and the actors for actually using Kurrent!)

And this is what Adelheid's Kurrent could have looked like:

Okay but now to the super specific 1910s to 1940 kinda Kurrent! It's called Sütterlin after the guy who invented it, it was in part inspired by the Jugendstil/Art Nouveau art movement and its main goal was to simplify the cursive for school kids to learn it easier. It looks a little something like this:

This one's a pretty neat and legible example but if the handwriting was really bad, on top of it being a new variant of Kurrent, even Friedrich and Adelheid could struggle a bit to read it. In the end of the episode maybe they find a new ghost that can read it, maybe it gives Urs a moment to shine or maybe it was Lotti's diary all along, any of these outcomes would be a lot of fun~ (And just for completion's sake, I don't know if Urs and Griet can write and/or read, but I'm sure Claudius can and his handwriting would probably look like this (which also wouldn't be very useful to Emma's deciphering quest lol):